Our nightmare
 

Guys,

Have you ever been in a place where you don`t see the end of the tunnel?
I need different perspective to see that maybe things are not that bad, but I can honestly say that our family is going through hell right now.

I had to move to New Mexico for a new job back in April, and we put our house for sale in New Jersey. My wife and daughter stayed there because we were hoping to sell the house quickly, and buy a new one so they could directly move with me.
But the house does not sell. We have lowered the price numerous times, from $465k to $409k (I bought for $505k). It just does not go, we are stuck with this rock around our neck. My wife is bordering depression now, she thinks she will not make it through this ordeal. We have been separated for over 3 months.

What we are contemplating now is renting our beautiful house, and living in a 3 bedroom apartment in Albuquerque. We are willing to take a huge equity loss, it does not matter anymore, we just want this to end, and to have a home again. Problem is, there doe not seem to be a price low enough that will attract buyers.

I almost feel like quiting this job and returning to New Jersey, even though there is no job to go back too.

Can you rent the Jersey house? I was kinda in the same boat when I retired and was ready to get out of town.....Been renting that house now for 2.5 yrs. With no mortgage on it, I make over $1K/mo after expenses.....Best of luck for sure...

You don't take a loss until you sell it. Rent it. If you value your marriage, get her where you are.

Sorry to see you and your family suffering with this.
But you have the solution somewhat worked out- get your family together in Albequerque, so you only have one house hold's worth of monthly expenditures. Rent out the NJ home, taking precautions on who you rent to.
Sure it will be a set back living in an apartment for a while, but if you have your health and loved ones together with you, and a job, you are far better off than others out there.
Some clarity will return once the depression lifts a little. Albequerque is a nice place, and perhaps your wife might be able to find work as well. That way the possible monthly loss (the difference between the rent and mortgage on the NJ spot) is minimized.
You need to get your family life back on track, and it won't happen without a job, moving back east.

Good luck and best wishes

Renting your house out long distance is a pain but maybe you can find a realtor to help with it and keep it rented, for sure they will take a bunch but it keeps your mind on living. Rent in NM for awhile, I think that would be best anyway.

Guy at work went through similar situation, He rented out his house and is renting an apt. here. Seems to be working out for him, only complaint is the square footage difference. Good luck, things will work out.

X2 what Gogar said

I really appreciate the support that this board brings, and hearing from people older and and wiser than me who went through similar situations is very comforting. Thanks guys, I really mean it.

I can say that for me, going from homeowner to renter was not the end of the world - not even close. Both have their ups and downs. Rent the place in NJ (maybe find a management company to handle the details) and rent in NM. House does not mean home. Home means home, and home is where family is. Long distance relationships are not relationships imho.

This same thing is happening all over here. Our neighbor is renting their house. Rent the house and get your family with you. Good luck!

It is never good to look back, but in 2007 when I sold my first house, I should have invested the profit in Apple stock and rented a place...where do they sell those crystal balls?

Nightmare? Really?

1. Call 5 property management agencies and interview them.
1a. Chose 1.
2. They rent out the property and maintain the property.
3. Your wife and child moves to NM


I don't see the drama.

Whether there is drama or not depends on the numbers.

If the total monthly expenses for the house (mortgage, property tax, maintenance, property management fees, association fees, etc.) is $2K, and you can rent it for roughly $2K, that's easy.

If the total monthly expenses for the house are $4K+ and the house can rent for $1,500, that gets a little more dramatic. Esp. since the value of the house isn't going up in the next half decade or longer (and in fact will probably continue to decline for some time). And even more esp. if you simply don't have the resources to continue throwing thousands of dollars a month into a declining value house, for years and years.

Expenses add up. My guess is the NJ property tax on that house is $1K or more, per month.

There's a reason why millions of houses are going back to the banks.

this

The mortgage and taxes are about $2.5k/month, taxes alone are $750/month. We can probably rent it for that amount.

The drama comes from the fact that selling was a much better option for us, because the company that hired me pays real estate fees, closing costs and points as part of the moving package. Plus, there are some smoking deals on the buying end right now. That is why we have been trying so hard to sell.
If I rent, I cannot buy, lose those incentives, and may rent for a very long time before the market recovers.

Got nothing else to add, except you and your family will be in our prayers tonight.
Stay strong and true.

how much do you owe on it?

The problem is, a market recovery arguably isn't going to help you. Yes, your house in NJ will go up in a mkt recovery, but most likely, the future house you are going to buy will also go up. So it will be a wash.

Exactly, so we may as well sell now if we can. I owe about $310k on it.

I agree.

OK. Take your pick:

1. Incentives from sale
2. Your wife and family.

SmileWavy