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Model Citizen
 
herr_oberst's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2007
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I'm not a "Gentleman"

Listen, I have manners, I hold doors open for ANY woman, I say please and thank you, I try to be polite.

But, when I'm standing at the auto zone, wearing flip flops, cargo shorts and a tee shirt that says "Van Halen, World Tour 1988", PLEASE do not call me a gentleman.

I'm talking about the counterman saying to his colleague; "Bob, I think the Gentleman over there is next."

How about just "Bob, that man is next."

The overuse of the term has caused it to sound condescending or/or patronizing and I'm tired of it.

Rant over.

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Old 09-28-2011, 07:41 PM
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Huh, OK. I don't care if they say "gentleman", "guy", "man" or "dude".

I generally try to use "sir" and "ma'am". Is that the same?
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Old 09-28-2011, 07:49 PM
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I get a little bothered when people call me sir or Mr. Too formal. I'm just Dave.
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Old 09-28-2011, 07:50 PM
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Gallatin, Tennessee
 
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Anymore, at a store I am happy to be acknowledged.

Dave
Old 09-28-2011, 08:02 PM
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I get a bit bent when they get all familiar and use the first name. If I don't know you, you don't need to be doing that. I treat people with respect and expect the same. If you prove to be unworthy of respect, I am not rude but not respectful. When my daily driver got totalled a few months ago, they are getting all familiar and friendly as they were screwing me over. After a few weeks of it, I told them to quit trying to blow sunshine up my skirt, telling me you want to resolve it quickly and get me all the money I was due. You want to get off as cheap as possible, don't BS me about it. I was born at night, but it was not last night.

I am much nicer in real life than I am here. Sorry Hugh, I am just can't pull it off, I know your policy and aspire to one day be as much of a gentleman as you are.

Steve, it just shows you were raised right
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Old 09-28-2011, 08:07 PM
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+1 The "sir" reminds of my Dad and when it comes from a cutie makes me feel older

Quote:
Originally Posted by slodave View Post
I get a little bothered when people call me sir or Mr. Too formal. I'm just Dave.
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Old 09-28-2011, 08:27 PM
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My father (b.1926) always gave me a hard time when I called a strange woman a "lady". He would ask me how I knew she was a lady? To him, they were born a woman - a lady was cultured!

Oh, and I'm 48 today, and (unfairly to others) I really don't like being called "sir". My bad...
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Old 09-28-2011, 08:57 PM
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I don't get sir very often...


Oh and I knew most of you guys weren't gentelmen a long time ago...
Old 09-28-2011, 09:20 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Oracle View Post
+1 The "sir" reminds of my Dad and when it comes from a cutie makes me feel older
Yep, I always tell em that my Father was Sir, I'm just Byron...
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Old 09-28-2011, 09:20 PM
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I also have a shirt from that VH tour. I don't think most folks get it anymore.
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Old 09-28-2011, 09:20 PM
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durn for'ner
 
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I (most Swedes) would probably come off very rude in USA. We don´t have the tradition of using words like Sir or Ma'am. It is a pretty useful phrase however when trying to get the attention of someone unknown. We had the same words in Sweden but they were more or less lost in practice decades ago.
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Old 09-28-2011, 09:54 PM
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But unlike English, most other European languages have a formal and informal tense for "you." So you're sort of saying "sir" by using the formal tense of you for adult strangers.
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Old 09-28-2011, 09:57 PM
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durn for'ner
 
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Thats true but not in Swedish alas.
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Old 09-28-2011, 10:00 PM
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I'm pretty sure you would rather be called a gentleman than what they call you after you leave.

Professionalism. Get used to it. Being older, and getting called sir. Get used to it.
Old 09-29-2011, 01:04 AM
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durn for'ner
 
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Yes Sir!
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Old 09-29-2011, 02:47 AM
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This is a good example of how culture is different in different parts of this country. You simply cannot lump "Americans" together.

Here, people are very respectful to each other and no one would be offended by being called a Gentleman. Where I lived in Upstate New York, what would pass for normal speech might be considered rude here.
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Old 09-29-2011, 03:35 AM
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I'm am used to, "HEY that azzhole is next."
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Old 09-29-2011, 04:09 AM
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This is what angers you? Being referred to as a gentleman by counter workers in an auto parts store?
Old 09-29-2011, 05:12 AM
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I personally save getting "wound up" for more "unique" occasions. Just as one poster aid, today I'm just happy when store staff notice me at all. Cheers
Old 09-29-2011, 05:40 AM
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I'm not angry; If I came across as that, then I went too far. I just think that we as a society label ordinary or meaningless situations as somewhat extraordinary:

• Britney Spears has an album that sells a million copies; the press anoints her a Diva. How does that make someone like Eartha Kitt or Aretha Franklin feel?

• A citizen rescues a kitten, he's called Hero. Personally, I use the word Hero a lot more sparingly.

• A smelly, drunk fatso wearing bib overalls with no shirt is referred to as a "Gentleman" at the local Walmart. Really?


See, the thing is, I feel that it dumbs down society if everyone gets to be special. I know that this is America where everyone has a chance to be what ever they want, the social strata allows for lateral movement; lucky us! USA! USA!
But to those who have put in the work to become something special, something better, shouldn't they be allowed to have their moment? Enjoy the fruits of their labors?

I'm guessing I'm just too nostalgic, and probably for something that never was.

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Old 09-29-2011, 06:09 AM
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