A friend in need

[genrex]

Here's what my Seattle social-services friend suggests. Basically along the lines of what everyone else is saying...

(1) Fill out the SSDI (Social Security Disability) application online. Doesn’t have to be 100% complete, just fill out as much as possible. The name of her prescribing doctor would be helpful. After each section is completed, make a copy (print-out) for her to save for her records.

Oregon DHS: Disabilty benefits - Disability Determination Services (DDS)

(2) Social Security will then send a letter to her mailing address, with short instructions on how to complete her application.

After she submits the initial online application (#1 above), she can then take her copies to DHS and tell a counselor that her disability application is “pending” and ask them for help... either financial help to stay in her apartment, or help getting into disability housing.

If she can get some financial help (even short-term), that qualifies as income... and if she has a little income, that qualifies her for low-income housing.

So in a nutshell – if she can’t get into disability housing right away, maybe she can get into low-income housing sooner.

(3) If she has a mental illness, then she might be happier in a group home setting. You can get a list of women-only group homes, and visit each home as a “walk-in” visitor. That’s a good way to see the homes as they really are. The level of noise is a consideration, as is personal privacy. You can visit the homes more than once, of course.

I forgot to ask about the application process for group homes...

[LWJ]

Genrex,
You are fantastic! Thank you,
Larry

[LWJ]

Jyl,

It is similar to your friend. I don't have hope that it will turn out nearly as clean as your banker friend. A quiet peaceful existence would be welcome for her.

Larry

[Baz]

Larry,

I cannot add anything to what's already been posted - you've been given a lot of excellent input.

I just wanted to say Good Luck - I hope the situation improves over time....

Keep us posted, please.

Baz

[Groesbeck Hurricane]

Larry,

Here are my random thoughts:

Give her the money for 30 days rent.

Sit down with her and talk about how much YOU need to have someone staying with you and how it would be so very nice if it were her. Talk about your needs and how she can help you out. Don't know what your needs are but I'm sure you are busy and could use help around the house, someone to talk to, someone who knows you to brainstorm your business ideas, and someone to work for you completing those tasks you just do not have time to complete.

The 30 days rent will allow you to consolidate her things in an orderly fashion. Moving into your spare room will consolidate spend and save everyone money in the long run.

Turn this into her helping you out, this is her opportunity to do something you need.


Now, you need to seek some psychiatric advice if you are going to take her on. Keep yourself level headed and in the game.

You will need to work HER into psychiatric help of some sort. Maybe it is through the church, maybe it is through a mental health agency, maybe there is another route. She MUST eventually reach out for help to get better.

You will be her crutch and she will start to expect things of you. Is there a danger either one of you could start to believe this is a romantic situation? This would lead to more issues.

Also, you need to check on her meds. Do they conflict with each other? Is she taking them as needed? Does she really need them or are they what is causing the issue? What is the underlying cause of this pain?


I have some friends we have given an open door invitation when things were down. It gave them the knowledge they would not sink into the streets. Sometimes it is what we do for those we love.

[jyl]

I asked around and was referred to NAMI: National Alliance on Mental Illness - Mental Health Support, Education and Advocacy as the organization that would know about programs, benefits, etc for persons will mental problems. I've no experience w/ them. I can ask around some more. PM me if you have info on her situation that might focus me a bit.