neighbor from hell

[Gogar]

Every example you give has some kind of qualifier or excuse added.

BUT they have no proof it was my dogs
BUT my dog can't be on a leash, it scares him
BUT my dogs are good dogs
BUT i was nice to them
BUT why does she have to be such a beyotch
BUT they said it was ok at first



My answer is this:

If they don't want your dog over there, you need to make damn well sure your dog is not over there. Period. END OF STORY.

If they don't want the girls walking through their property, then you need to make sure the girls do not walk through their property. END OF STORY.

You need to be the nicest mother effer on the block, regardless of how you actually feel. That's it.

You can't claim the moral high ground you obviously want in this situation until

1. Your dogs do not go over there. Ever.
2. You respect their right to not have the girls walk through their property. It just doesn't matter if it's stupid or not.


I do hope it works out for you! Nobody wants schitty neighbors. No one wants to be the schitty neighbor either.




PS: You gotta cool it with the commas, man.

[Evans, Marv]

If it were me, I'd just be straight out with the guy. Tell him when you are alone with him he's clueless and you're going to be direct about it, and that you don't mean any harm but just want to get the situation straight. Explain about the time line involving the trash & let him know about the coyote situation. He should understand since you live in an urban environment, there are some things you can't control and wildlife is one of them. Also let him know everybody helps everybody else out like when you helped him, and if he wants to isolate himself by being hostile it might not work out for him in the long run. I live in the country too, and the people around me are direct with each other in a practical way. It works out fine that way, and if somebody gets stuck wtih something, we're there with the resources we have.

[Evans, Marv]

Take Gogar's comments to heart too.

[LeeH]

Originally Posted by vash

that property is HUGE!! i bet a dog takes a dump out there, your chances of even finding it with the bottom of your shoe is remote.

is "taking the high road" an option? i mean, go over there with a tray of food..or wine and talk it out. maybe she is just being a total beotch because the stresses of moving are wearing on her.

(i rarely take the high road, just saying)

Yeah, I think I'd have to try the nice guy approach on this one. "Sorry we got off on the wrong foot.... we live next to each other and could for a long, long time, so let's do whatever it takes to make it pleasant, etc."

Can you offer to buy them a container for the trash so no dogs get into it?

[T77911S]

mine are in an electric fence and water on 3 sides, the neighbors have a wood fence. hers get out a good bit. in fact, on e was in my back yard the other day.
we dont live in a neighbor hood, its like the country, but close to civilization. if it was a neighbor hood, i would have a fence, actually, i would not have a dog.

i read part of gogars little story, you dont get it either. they left 1 garbage bag full of food out side.
they have done nothing, if anything we have gone over and helped them out. we showed them where chris put potatoes in the walls, and told them about other things he did to the house. its too bad you cant read either. (he was thankfull for the info. he went back in and cut holes in the walls to get them out.)(and he asked us about the history of the house)
your story iis more agrevating than whats going on because you have assumed so much or added things in your story. just stay out of it, your not welcome in my thread. what an ass.

[tweezers74]

I agree with Lee, Marv, and Gogar. This could get ugly fast and that would just not be very fun since it will be a long time, considering they just moved in. Direct and nice guy is good. But I would like to say that ultimately, it is their property and even though it is the country and it seems everybody is really nice in the neighborhood except this b*%*#!, you can't really get mad at her for wanting her property to be, well, her property. She will just be the house that gets egged at Halloween.

Maybe try to build a smaller enclosed/fenced in area on your property for the dogs? So then you don't have to build an entire fence for your property.

Sucks to have no bueno neighbors.

[Gogar]

*you're


As in

"You're the one who was asking for suggestions."


Best of luck to you with your situation.

[T77911S]

i have been EXTREMELY nice to the guy. i have only said hi to her once. when he asked that hte kids stay off his property, i told was extremly nice and told him its his property and he has the right to do what he wants.

gogar, you did not read very well. the girl that walks to the bus is not my kid and i dont have control over her.



i am planning on talking to him again when i can. i dont think he liked doing what he did because he could not look me in the eye when he was telling me.

[vash]

good luck T77.

i'm hoping the stresses of buying a house and moving is the catalyst for the woman's rage..

bring wine. keep us posted. great neighbors are the best.

[T77911S]

Originally Posted by Gogar

*you're


As in

"You're the one who was asking for suggestions."


Best of luck to you with your situation.

i never asked for any help. just thought i would share my christmas weekend. its slow at work today.


its not going to get ugly. i dont have to socialize with them, and the few other neighbors around dont like them now either, so they have isolated themselves.

i will continue to help the other neighbors. if i talk to to him again and he feels the same way, we will just be non speaking neighbors.

[T77911S]

this thread is not about dogs, kids or garbage. its about having to live next door to someone that, for lack of a better word, is petty or vindictive. one of those people that if you bump into them, they have to hit you, or if hit them, they have to kill you. someone that just has to always get the better of someone.

[mossguy]

Originally Posted by T77911S

i never asked for any help. just thought i would share my christmas weekend. its slow at work today.

You might be better off finding some work to do today.

[sammyg2]

Good luck, hope it turns out well.

I've been living at my house for nearly 19 years and have NEVER had any issue with a neighbor. No hurt feelings, no gossip, nothing.

That's because I mind my own business and keep to myself and expect them to do the same.
I don't make noise that would annoy them and expect the same in return.
I keep my property clean and maintained and expect the same from them.
I don't go onto their property and ask the same from them. I keep my dog in my back yard and they do the same. No reason to ever have a problem.

I take that back, I might have hurt one neighbor's feelings early on. Once when he asked me to fix his car and once when he asked if he could borrow some tools.
I was cool about it but let him know neither of those are allowed.

Not really sure if he got butt-hurt or not because I mind my own business and didn't go around having conversations with everyone I saw.

I'll wave at the neighbors when I see them and they do the same to me, but that's it. A wave is not an invitation to come over and impose.

It works out really well that way. Friendly from a distance is way better than PITA up close.

[BeyGon]

when you open up your life on a public forum you don't always get a box of chocolates.

[Noporscheform]

Since college my wife and I have lived in 10 houses in four states and two countries.

Never had a neighbor that did not become a good friend.
Never had a neighbor that would not be welcomed to drop in any time of the day or night.
Never had a neighbor that would feel uncomfortable calling me for ANY reason any time of the day or night.

Always wondered how people could go thru life living twenty feet away from someone and not extend a hand in friendship.

[szyzygy]

Originally Posted by pwd72s

My experience is that good fences make good neighbors...

Get them to pay for half!

[Jim Bremner]

Originally Posted by Noporscheform

Since college my wife and I have lived in 10 houses in four states and two countries.

Never had a neighbor that did not become a good friend.
Never had a neighbor that would not be welcomed to drop in any time of the day or night.
Never had a neighbor that would feel uncomfortable calling me for ANY reason any time of the day or night.

Always wondered how people could go thru life living twenty feet away from someone and not extend a hand in friendship.

I've only lived in about 6 houses. I have only had 1 house where I had a neighbor that had issues. AND there was a second one with issues. The frst one would talk crap on everyone mostly neighbor #2 so #1 and #2 both had problems and didn't like people and the funny thing was even if they didn't like each other to the extent of trying to cause problems with each other they would gang up to create bigger issues with another neighbor!

We lived in a city where you could only paint your house certain colors, had to hire city permited workers, couldn't park your car overnight on the street. couldn't have a work vehicle on your property overnight etc. These two assclowns made the last 6 years living there pretty hard! I was happy to move.

[yellowperil]

Originally Posted by Gogar

Every example you give has some kind of qualifier or excuse added.

BUT they have no proof it was my dogs
BUT my dog can't be on a leash, it scares him
BUT my dogs are good dogs
BUT i was nice to them
BUT why does she have to be such a beyotch
BUT they said it was ok at first



My answer is this:

If they don't want your dog over there, you need to make damn well sure your dog is not over there. Period. END OF STORY.

If they don't want the girls walking through their property, then you need to make sure the girls do not walk through their property. END OF STORY.

You need to be the nicest mother effer on the block, regardless of how you actually feel. That's it.

You can't claim the moral high ground you obviously want in this situation until

1. Your dogs do not go over there. Ever.
2. You respect their right to not have the girls walk through their property. It just doesn't matter if it's stupid or not.


I do hope it works out for you! Nobody wants schitty neighbors. No one wants to be the schitty neighbor either.




PS: You gotta cool it with the commas, man.

None of my business but I think Gogar is right. Be nice and it might rub off otherwise you're all going to be miserable, and maybe for a long time. Have them over for some brownies (wink,wink) see how that goes. Good luck pal

[porsche930dude]

inviting unfamiliar animals and children to roam freely on your land unsupervised is a lawsuit waiting to happen. Keep your dog contained and when their garbage gets ripped up again and again theyll know it wasnt your dog. Our neighbors are good but when the land around our house went up for sale we bought it as soon as we saw the sign!

[onewhippedpuppy]

Gogar nailed it. If they don't want your dogs on their property, as a dog owner it is your responsibility to keep your dogs off of their property. Same goes for the kids. Period, end of story. Can't handle that? Then you shouldn't have dogs or kids, because you have zero rights to their property.

We are great friends with all of our neighbors except one, which we have a horrible relationship with. Their dogs started crapping in my yard from the first day they moved in, and at first I was super nice about asking them to keep them out of my yard. But you know what, they made zero effort. Therefore each request became less and less nice, which culminated in my wife unloading on the lady after both she and one of my kids stepped in a big fresh turd. They finally built a fence, but the damage is done. We don't speak, and I'm ok with that. So from my perspective I felt totally disrespected, particularly when I didn't even receive an apology from them after multiple issues. Seems to me you're placing the entirety of the blame on them without any objective reflection on your part. She may be a b!tch, but that doesn't make it ok for your dogs to be in her yard.