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-   -   Broke up with the GF yesterday (http://forums.pelicanparts.com/off-topic-discussions/772959-broke-up-gf-yesterday.html)

kinein 09-23-2013 01:08 PM

Embraer

hey bro sorry to hear about the break up. I didnt get the pleasure to meet your gf when i came to pick up the tickets from you. Well if you cant be yourself in a relationship then its fake.
KEEP IT REAL. So does this mean i'll see you at the grand prix next year?

BlueSkyJaunte 09-23-2013 01:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Don Ro (Post 7670176)
Garage sale...never know - could meet cute neighbor.

Make it a yard sale / BBQ and you could meet a cute meat-eating neighbor! :D

Chocaholic 09-23-2013 01:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Embraer (Post 7670171)
thanks for the support guys and tweeze. now the interesting part. ...whether to stay in LA and pay a lot of money for rent, or move back into my old shared house in palmdale. plus...now I have another house worth of furniture and crap. I might just donate it all to habitat for humanity....it's basically all brand new stuff.


You're saying that not only did you try to become a Vegan for her, you also lived in LA in a high rent place....also for her? Time to reinstate your man-card and take ownership of your life. You were waaaay too bent over for this woman. Not her fault, I see it as yours.

On the other side of the coin, I'm sure she saw that you were the one bending like a pretzel. Not conducive to long term success. She should have never let it go as far as it did. Perhaps her ultimatum wasn't "really" about being a vegan. May have been an easy path to parting ways.

Tough it out. Breaking up was a good thing for both of you. For future reference, if you find yourself turning your life upside down and trying to be something you're not for another woman...take note. It doesn't, and shouldn't work.

motion 09-23-2013 01:55 PM

Ummmm.... no woman is going to want to live in Palmdale. I've been to the Palmdale Walmart (it was a bike racing emergency) and I know of what I speak :D

Baz 09-23-2013 02:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Joe Bob (Post 7670416)
Hot Rods in CA can be tricky with non original frames AND bodies. The DMV will no longer license pre '76 VW pans with a Porsche body.

Repop frames and glass bodies also need to comply with modern smog rules. Unless you get one of the 500 exemptions issued every year. They disappear before noon on January 2nd. :(

I know that's some kind of metaphor......just not sure which one.

But I like it! :D

nostatic 09-23-2013 02:17 PM

nominated for the "wrong thread, right message" award

Don Ro 09-23-2013 02:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Chocaholic (Post 7670382)
Perhaps her ultimatum wasn't "really" about being a vegan. May have been an easy path to parting ways.

Thought the same thing.

Don Ro 09-23-2013 02:37 PM

A short between the earplugs? :D

j/k

strupgolf 09-23-2013 03:25 PM

There's a whole bunch more fish in the ocean and a whole bunch more cattle on the range. Good luck in your future search.

targa911S 09-23-2013 03:58 PM

women marry thinking they can change their man, men marry thinking their women will never change.

sc_rufctr 09-23-2013 04:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Don Ro (Post 7670449)
Thought the same thing.

+1... Often when someone wants out they lack the courage to just end it so "finding" a deal breaker is a common strategy.

If you just end a relationship people will ask why and somehow we feel we need to provide a valid reason even if we can't quite verbalise it. So statements like "it just wasn't working" are common.

Move on QUICKLY. Don't waste a moment of your life on someone who wont accept you they way you are.

sc_rufctr 09-23-2013 04:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by targa911S (Post 7670579)
women marry thinking they can change their man, men marry thinking their women will never change.

That sums up my failed marriage.

targa911S 09-23-2013 04:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sc_rufctr (Post 7670584)
That sums up my failed marriage.

that sums up everybody's failed marriage..

Danimal16 09-23-2013 04:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by targa911S (Post 7670579)
women marry thinking they can change their man, men marry thinking their women will never change.

Very True. Wisdom is understanding this.

Seahawk 09-23-2013 04:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by HardDrive (Post 7669757)
I think you handled it the way most would. Ultimatums are not what relationships are about. She's flexible, and so am I.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Evans, Marv (Post 7669781)
I could never truly trust a person whose philosophies, behavior, or lifestyle represents far ends of the spectrum.

Quote:

Originally Posted by nostatic (Post 7669785)
At some point we all stop pretending and be who we are.

Better to find out now rather than later...

Quote:

Originally Posted by onewhippedpuppy (Post 7669984)
My wife is a devout Catholic...had she attempted to force me into it, we wouldn't have gotten married.

Mike, just repeat the above, and the other excellent posts, to yourself if you ever waiver in the belief that this wasn't a positive thing.

Long haul relationships require maintenance and mutual respect, not dictums.

jyl 09-23-2013 04:26 PM

You are a lucky man.

Don Ro 09-23-2013 04:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Seahawk (Post 7670602)
Long haul relationships require maintenance and mutual respect, not dictums.

An old man once said to me, "Relationships are like a fence line, you always need to maintain them."

Embraer 09-23-2013 04:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Chocaholic (Post 7670382)
You're saying that not only did you try to become a Vegan for her, you also lived in LA in a high rent place....also for her? Time to reinstate your man-card and take ownership of your life. You were waaaay too bent over for this woman. Not her fault, I see it as yours.

On the other side of the coin, I'm sure she saw that you were the one bending like a pretzel. Not conducive to long term success. She should have never let it go as far as it did. Perhaps her ultimatum wasn't "really" about being a vegan. May have been an easy path to parting ways.

Tough it out. Breaking up was a good thing for both of you. For future reference, if you find yourself turning your life upside down and trying to be something you're not for another woman...take note. It doesn't, and shouldn't work.

I did try to become vegan...i can respect the health aspects of it. in the year of doing it, my blood pressure went from about 145/110 to 110/74.

I knew after date number 4 that she wanted a partner who would be vegan for life. i tried my best to adapt the lifestyle, but when it came to really think long and hard about our future, i knew that, in good faith, i couldnt commit to that. i do feel bad.

she feels as though i have deceived her, when in actuality, i tried my best to adapt the lifestyle. i did it for her, as well as myself.

im not denying that i brought this on myself. it just sucks that ive lost somebody who has brought so much to my life, helped me to look at things in a different way, and helped me to become a better person. (in a lot of things...not just having to do with animals)

i feel like she came into my life for a reason...i have certainly changed for the better by having her in my life. it just sucks it didnt work out.

thanks for all of the kind words by everybody here....it's been a tough day.

Embraer 09-23-2013 04:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Seahawk (Post 7670602)
Mike, just repeat the above, and the other excellent posts, to yourself if you ever waiver in the belief that this wasn't a positive thing.

Long haul relationships require maintenance and mutual respect, not dictums.

i do see the positive in the whole situation..still just hard to deal with right now

lendaddy 09-23-2013 04:40 PM

She was looking for a way out of the relationship, this was just her vehicle. Don't sweat it and move on.

It drives me crazy when people say things like "marriage is hard work and is all about compromise, etc..."

No... no it is not. My marriage is anything but work and we are incredibly happy. We have been together over 20 years. Not much compromising going on but lots of understanding.

She did you a favor, you're better off with someone else.


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