In all seriousness though, there is much wisdom here. Different people have certain things that are more important than anything else. Obviously, her vegan-ism is more important to her than the relationship. If you aren't willing to sublimate your desires in the interest of the relationship then you did the best thing you could do.

Just think though, you missed an entire lifetime with an air of moral superiority!

So, I guess my question is.....did she complain when you ate her?? Last time I checked, they weren't lettuce leaves :--)

Chin up, this too shall pass..

Nobody was denying her vegan wishes. However, she apparently couldn't see where she ended and you start. People who have this problem make their spouses miserable over time.

The perfect woman changes into a roast beef sandwich & a 6 pack the very second you are finished having sex. Look for one ...they are out there!

Wait until you get older, and your girlfriends hit menopause.

Of course by that time, there should be a cure for that...

__

HEY!? Weren't you the guy pondring whehter or not it was alright to park a Ferarri outside ;)

You've clearly got much more important things to ponder than a stubborn born carnivore turned praticed leaf eater :)

How'd that steak taste? You've had one right...

ha! the Ferrari did stay outside for about a month. of course, nothing happened to it.

an interesting thing about this situation....

her mom had planned a visit from Australia months ago to come see us. anyway..she's coming next week. she plans on being here 3 weeks. well, the situation has been hard for both of us.

for the guys who think she was looking for an "out"...that couldn't be more wrong. she's devastated by the whole thing. she thought that i was totally on board with veganism. probably, because i was fairly mum about my feelings. I knew from early on that she needed a vegan partner. I thought I could become that person. I did do it for a year. a solid year of no meat or animal products. like I said earlier, I can get on board for the health reasons, but like others here said...that type of commitment is like a religion. which, in good, faith...I can't commit to right now.

anyway...her mom is coming, we're not together. i'm letting her stay at my house in LA....ive moved up to my old place in palmdale. yesterday was the toughest day. we said goodbye for probably the last time. it's hard to say goodbye to somebody who I still love very much...and also my best friend.

we have two little dogs that we rescued. they are staying with her and her mom for the next three weeks. she'll be going back to Australia with her mom...so I wont see her before she goes. ...but I will be taking the dogs once she's gone. I love the little dogs...they do help with stress in my life. when we first got them, I didn't really want the responsibility. now I couldn't imagine not having them.

so yeah...here I am, back in the desert.

You get to BBQ without looking over your shoulder?

You can have bacon & eggs without remorse?

You can drink bacon infused vodka till you pass out?

And best of all .... your expenses just went down by a wheelbarrow full.

Ummm ..... Winner Winner Chicken Dinner!

I say take the things that you feel were positive changes for you as a person and continue to make them a part of you. You clearly believe that your time with her was a benefit to you so as a sort of tribute to your time together continue to incorporate those things that you feel were beneficial. At the same time move forward as the better person you now are with your eyes wide open.

Break up's are difficult but like any difficult experience you will be able to learn from it. Next time be more open about your feelings. You may have felt at the time that you were really trying but by keeping your feeling to yourself you allowed her to think that you were OK with the changes that she was forcing on you. Find a women that accepts you for who you are and not for who she wants you to be. No women is worth sacrificing your identity.

Good luck, Mike. Stay positive, talk it out with your friends.

I did. in some ways...I thought that after investing this much time in each other, that we'd be OK if I couldn't commit to it...but her passion for it in her heart is just THAT deep. yesterday we talked...and she said she wouldn't be honoring herself if she compromised on this one thing. she said she could compromise on ANYTHING except that.

maybe in a week or two, she'll think a little harder about it....but I think she's fairly set in her ways.

I don't know. This just sounds crazy to me. It's so hard to find someone who is compatible with you. It sounds like you two love each other and are best friends. But yet this wonderful relationship falls apart because you will eat a piece of chicken?

Blows my mind.

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger. You'll more than recover from this. Take out a girl who loves steak and then, well you know......

You were into the relationship more than she was. that was an out.

Frankly all that irrational internal spirituality talk **** sucks to deal with. Had an ex who uses that type of talk to describe herself. In real life, she's a dingbat, and her life reflects that. In her family she's considered the Dodo. Beautiful but dumb as ****.

rjp

Sorry, but don't kid yourself. She doesn't want you and don't be surprised if you bump into her at a local steakhouse with some dude face-deep in barbecue sauce from going to town on some ribs. "Best friends" and lovers compromise. I can appreciate ideals and conviction, but if she really cared about you she'd respect your convictions like you do hers. She did you a big favor.

xactly what I was thinking.... that whole conviction thing is BS. Works that way with sex too. Push you off, push you off, then one night stand with some random guy...LOL

rjp

Until the next thing. :(

you guys have no idea.

has no one asked for pictures of this girl yet?


we need to judge if it is worth lying about not eating meat just to keep her happy.

Mike, I think you're right, kinda

I agree with Motion on this one. And disagree with the general sentiment of other Pelicans on this thread. Imagine that, a bunch of self-centered 50-something cranky white guys having a similar opinion on women and relationships...

Flip this around.

She's sobbing to her friends about this and they are all saying, "he values meat-eating more than he values you!"......which is true, right?

And that's how I see it: are you valuing your individual choice more than you are valuing your partner as a couple/team. Want to be an individual? Be single.

Which you are now. And now you're free to do as you damn well please. Which seems to be the misogynistic view of many Pelicans here.

But she's not to blame here. She laid it out at the beginning.

If you "click" on the 999 other attributes of your relationship and truly love each other, I'd think long and hard about losing that partner based on one relatively unimportant thing. She's young. You're young. Most likely those "hard" views will soften over time.

You'll have no trouble finding another partner. They're out there, and 99.99% of them eat meat. But believe me, there will be some other unimportant issue....some kind of crazy.... that will make you feel the same way. They ALL have that something. And so do you. It's that individual choice. And it will take two people at the same time choosing to give up that individual choice to make choices together as a couple. It gets worse when you sacrifice those choices you make as a couple to those you will make as parents. It is constant.

Or, you can choose to stay single like many Pelicans who have weighed in here. Do what you want, when you want. Accumulate toys to fill that void. It works very well for some people.

Or, you can find a subservient female companion. Find a trophy wife or unequal partner. One where you can call the shots and she'll follow. Many Pelicans have those too.

Good luck. You know what advice I'm giving.