Parents-biggest threat to your young kids?

[berettafan]

Would like to see what parents of grade school aged kids perceive as the greatest threat(s) to their children these days.

For myself it's drugs in schools, violence in pop culture and parents of his peers just not doing their job. (my kids are 5 and 10).

What are you guys worried most about?

by high school i'll have a new set of worries involving sex and driving.

[sammyg2]

Move this thread to PARF and I'll be able to answer it.

[JavaBrewer]

My kids are both in High School now. But when they were in elementary school, highly ranked (why we moved there) public school, I think the biggest threat was getting bad teachers. Parents need to be very involved with the entire process. Doing so will provide insight into what teachers to avoid. Seems that every grade had 1 super star teacher, 1-2 who were 'good', and 1-2 to absolutely avoid.

The wife and I decided she would stay home with the kids (at a big hit $$) those early years. She volunteered at the elementary school and was a teacher assistant 2x a week. Our kids always ended up with the teacher we wanted. It was sad to see how terrible some of those teachers were.

[legion]

I've got one who will be in preschool next year and another on the way.

We picked an area to live where people have similar values to us. I know we will deal with some bozo parents and teachers along the way, but we're trying to teach my son to be independent and resilient. I saw too many kids growing up who had their entire lives scheduled by their parents and couldn't make a decision without mommy and imploded in adulthood.

I think the biggest threats are leveraged federal government bubble that will pop on my son's watch, and the loss of freedom due to tracking technology embedded in everything.

[berettafan]

by grade school I meant through high school.

surely a bad teacher can make for a very tough year. been there, done that.

[vash]

A bad education.

Stupidity stink is difficult to shake.

[pavulon]

All too often, the biggest threat to kids are their own parents...many have no idea how influential they are or how much benefit and harm they can or are bestowing on their own kids.

[bivenator]

The biggest danger IMHO to my daughter are the other girls and sometimes the boys. The "mean girls" phenomenon is real, why are women such witches to each other? Mine is no shrinking violet and can hold her own, but it does hurt when there is cattiness.

[Porsche-O-Phile]

Our so-called "food" supply (over processed, over sugared, over sodiumed, chemical-laden garbage).

That and the public indoctrination... er... "education" system.

[Evans, Marv]

I never had kids. I worked in education in various capacities. During my time of watching and working with kids, parental supervision and guidance were the major factors. Some people (kids included) have the temperament to make poor decisions, but parental concern, involvement, supervision, and guidance are super important in deciding whether or not a child will tend to make a good decision in any given circumstance. It takes tenacity that some just don't have. I've seen many times where the parent(s) just didn't want to be involved with their kid's problems and actions. These kids' actions can influence and involve others. Additionally the bad teacher/bad educational system is a reality and are big players too.

[glewis80SC]

The Zombie Apocalypse!!!..................................... ...............seriously it's friends who's parents don't parent anymore.

[nostatic]

Originally Posted by pavulon

All too often, the biggest threat to kids are their own parents...many have no idea how influential they are or how much benefit and harm they can or are bestowing on their own kids.

^^^

I don't worry that much about external influences. There will always be bad choices that can be made. The key is to try and give your kid the tools to make some right decisions, and insight into how to recover from the wrong ones. But also key is letting them make some wrong ones int he first place...

[aschen]

cellphones, ipads, other "devices"

[madmmac]

^^^...this

Kids today are not having nearly the face to face interaction.

I interviewed some early 20 somethings a couple of weeks ago. They could hardly talk or look you in the eyes.

[BE911SC]

Originally Posted by berettafan

Would like to see what parents of grade school aged kids perceive as the greatest threat(s) to their children these days.

For myself it's drugs in schools, violence in pop culture and parents of his peers just not doing their job. (my kids are 5 and 10).

I entered Kindergarten in fall 1967, just in time for schools in the S.F East Bay Area to begin integrating and busing. The schools went from Leave it to Beaver to Fort Apache in a short period of time. Drugs, violence in pop culture and poor parenting--across the board, not just in certain racial or economic demographics--was a problem then too. Hey, it was the turbulent late '60s.

My kids are 14 and 16 and in public schools. Good parenting and good teachers, combined with their own born-with work ethic and street smarts, has kept them on the path to success.

"There is nothing new under the sun." It's just your turn to deal with having young children in public schools.

Oh, and the greatest threat to our kids is globalization of labor and the race to the bottom in wages, especially in the United States. I half-jokingly (half-cynically) tell them that for the U.S. to compete with China we must become China, not the other way around. My wife and I have prepared them to be ready not only to have several job changes in their careers but to also be ready to go to where the jobs are, even if that means China.

[BE911SC]

Originally Posted by aschen

cellphones, ipads, other "devices"

Addiction to, that is.

[Eric 951]

Being the subject of cat-calls while walking around NYC.

[Rapewta]

Idle time.
If they show any interest in anything... get them involved.
Music lessons, soccer, little league an so on.
The biggest threat is having too much free time. It can lead to boredom and can go down hill.
As a parent, you need to spend some of your free time with them.

They need to spend a lot of their time with trusted adults, teaching them how to become adults.

[peppy]

That we have or are making bad choices about his education, that us pushing him into a normal school setting is not the best thing for him.

He is only in the first grade so I will worry about drugs, girls, bullying, and driving later.

[jyl]

Two kids, now one starting college and one starting high school. Daughter went to a private (language immersion) school through middle school, then public high school. Son went private (same school) through grade school then public (arts magnet) for middle school, now starting public high school.

Drugs and alcohol were not a problem through middle school - I mean they were non-existent, a non-issue. That's for my kids and also for my friends' kids, who went to a mix of public and private schools. Some of the kids started to drink alcohol and smoke pot in high school, but it wasn't a problem, in the sense that it didn't mess them up. By the way, some of the most straight-laced kids in high school are now seriously cutting loose in college, stumbling drunk or high every weekend, according to my now-college freshman daughter. They never learned how to control or pace themselves.

Smoking (cigarettes) also wasn't a problem. In high school, a handful of the kids became smokers, but very very few (that is out of a >1,000 kid high school). Smoking is about as uncool to kids now as venereal disease.

Physical bullying wasn't a problem. I heard zero reports of it.

Online bullying was a problem for some of the girls who were in my kids' schools, in at least one case a severe problem. Neither of my kids encountered it. They didn't get on Facebook etc until 8th grade.

Academic pressure, stress, and workload was a problem for my daughter. The private school's homework load in middle school was ridiculous. In 6th grade she was doing 6 hours of homework a night, routinely staying up until 1 am. I thought it was pointless. I don't see that it matters if your kid is on track to do calculus by sophomore year in high school, or not until junior or senior year. That's why we moved the younger child to public school. He had a much better experience.

Video game and/or online video addiction was a problem for both. They still did well in school, had lots of activities, were well-rounded kids, etc. But it was a constant struggle to control the hours they spent on the computer, to get them to stop "multitasking" (doing homework while listening to music and watching Netflix and keeping up with several text conversations).

Social anxiety and insecurity was a problem for my daughter, but she grappled with it and got through. Not a problem for my son.

I did get to know some of their classmates who were kind of messed up. In every case that I can think of, the problem was their parents. One girl would get out of theater rehearsal at 10 pm and then have to walk in the dark to a bus stop and make her way home in the rain, because her wealthy parents couldn't be bothered to pick her up, nor to show up for her performances or anything else, or even to get her a cab. For high school, they shipped her off to boarding school in England. She really has the parental cards stacked against her, and it shows.

I also know a young girl, now in high school, whose mother was homeless as a teenager, never went to college, and now works at a minimum wage job and just barely makes ends meet. That girl is growing up great, doing well in a "tough" high school and training in an intensive dance program (her desired career is as a choreographer), well-adjusted, on track for a college scholarship, growing up into one of the most beautiful young women I've ever known. Money helps, being in a fancy school can help, but those are minor things compared to the parents, genetics, and luck.