"Can't use my tickets, you want them?" Need your opinion....

[UconnTim97]

That email implies that he was giving them away since he can't use them. It was nice of you to offer to pay. Very odd that he accepted that offer.

We just gave our theatre tickets away to my BIL. We made it known that they were available and free since we weren't able to attend this show.

[MBAtarga]

I can see the offer from the email going either way.
I think there is a difference between "Does one of you want them" (which could have an implied - pay me for them) vs "Could one of you use them" - as in, I can't so can you use them so they don't go to waste.

[Hugh R]

I have an RVing buddy who is three pay grades above me at least. He is a Sr. VP. He has seasons tickets to the Dodgers. When he has tickets he can't use, he always notes that they are for sale, or free.

[speeder]

You should have asked, "how much?" You can't just guess whether someone is giving something away or selling it and you can't really offer to pay for something but not really mean it, (get offended when they accept).

I agree that he was not clear on whether they were free or not but that's all the more reason to ask. At the end of the day, you went to hockey game and sat center ice with your son and paid face value for the tickets. Plus learned something about dealing with that relative. Don't give him any freebies. It will all come out in the wash, as they say.

[Willem Fick]

I have given a number of tickets away in my life, sometimes to complete strangers, and never considered taking money - even when it was offered. I always felt that the money I paid for them was lost in any case and there was no harm in paying forward. Must add that I did however feel that those not at least offering to pay were rude, even given that I wouldn't accept their money.

In your case I certainly it was polite of you to offer, but I do feel his taking the money was a bit off.

The one instance that did peave me hugely though was when I gave tickets to someone who then went and sold them at more than face value (scalping?).

[oldE]

Typically I would expect to purchase unless otherwise stated.

One can infer all sorts of things (wishful thinking?) but your interpretation of what he wrote as opposed to what he actually meant cannot be held in judgement against him.

If you decide to back out, don't delay too long.

Best
Les

[sugarwood]

Originally Posted by speeder

you can't really offer to pay for something but not really mean it, (get offended when they accept).

I agree that he was not clear on whether they were free or not but that's all the more reason to ask.

+1

[Lothar]

Funny story: A neighbor had season tickets and gave two tickets for a game to another neighbor as a thank you for some neighborly deed. The recipient's wife was not interested in going, so he called me and asked if I would like to go, which I did.

The neighbor who was the source of the tickets inquired of the other neighbor if he enjoyed the game. He was told that his wife was not interested, so he invited me.

The donor then called me and asked me to pay for the ticket, since I was an unintended beneficiary.

Needless to say, we have not spoken since then and I did not pay him for the ticket.

[Moses]

As many of you have suggested, I'm absolutely certain the tickets were free until I offered to pay for them. No big deal, I'll have a great time with my son.

I'm not annoyed by the money. If he had asked up front I would gladly have paid for the tickets. The annoying thing is that it's a total breach of the unspoken "sports tickets etiquette" In my circle, offered tickets are always free unless specifically stated. Most tickets (these included) are corporate tickets. Either bought with corporate funds or written off as an entertainment expense.

Here's how ticket protocol usually works...

1) I offer a friend tickets I can't use.

2) He offers to pay. I refuse.

3) He sends me a thank you note or a bottle of wine after the game.

I'm not pissed about paying for the tickets, but I'd rather pay inflated prices on StubHub than be played by a family member.

[Noah930]

If tickets are for sale, they're for sale. Seller mentions that in the initial offering. To not make any mention of price in the offering--and then expect to be paid--is breach of etiquette. Why would I agree to buy them if I had no idea whether they're a pair of $25 bleacher seats, or $1000 apiece luxo-box tix?

[nostatic]

Originally Posted by Moses

I'm not pissed about paying for the tickets, but I'd rather pay inflated prices on StubHub than be played by a family member.

As they say, you can pick your friends, but you can't pick your family. Though you don't have to spend any time with them...

[fintstone]

Just be straight with him. Tell him that you can't go because you did not realize the were so expensive when you offered to pay for them (Obviously if you wanted to buy them for full price, you would have bought them the same way he did). Maybe he will come back and offer them for a more reasonable price.

[Moses]

Originally Posted by fintstone

Just be straight with him. Tell him that you can't go because you did not realize the were so expensive when you offered to pay for them (Obviously if you wanted to buy them for full price, you would have bought them the same way he did). Maybe he will come back and offer them for a more reasonable price.

It's really not that big a deal. I can afford the tickets. I'm just always surprised when people behave in ways I never would.

All of my good friends are gracious and generous. They tip well in restaurants and treat people with respect. It's taken years to cull the herd. =)

[Seahawk]

Originally Posted by Moses

1) I offer a friend tickets I can't use.

2) He offers to pay. I refuse.

3) He sends me a thank you note or a bottle of wine after the game.

In my world that is the Circle of Ticket Life, described exactly. Every transaction in life should be so simple, understood.

There is a parallel world in the lending and borrowing of farm equipment or asking for help when you need it: the only difference is return the item in the same or better shape and be ready to help when they need it. Oh, and beer rather than wine.

[nostatic]

Originally Posted by Seahawk

Oh, and beer rather than wine.

Philistine...

[stomachmonkey]

Originally Posted by Moses

...(these included) are corporate tickets. Either bought with corporate funds or written off as an entertainment expense....

Is it his business or is he an employee of the business with access to the tickets.

Put another way, did he pay for them originally?

[speeder]

Originally Posted by Moses

It's really not that big a deal. I can afford the tickets. I'm just always surprised when people behave in ways I never would.

All of my good friends are gracious and generous. They tip well in restaurants and treat people with respect. It's taken years to cull the herd. =)

I just want to add after my previous post, his etiquette in this matter was awful. Total bait and switch. But you should have asked, "how much?", before agreeing to take them. That way, the other person has to clarify that they are free or tell you, "buy dinner some time", or give you the price.

I also do not associate with anyone who has bad manners or is not generous. They continually inspire me to be a better person and be more generous so I benefit from that as well as their generosity.

[mreid]

Crappy grammar and a crappy situation. His offer implied free. This guy is rather toolish.

[fintstone]

Originally Posted by Moses

It's really not that big a deal. I can afford the tickets. I'm just always surprised when people behave in ways I never would.

All of my good friends are gracious and generous. They tip well in restaurants and treat people with respect. It's taken years to cull the herd. =)

I didn't mean you couldn't afford them, only that you likely would not have purchased them yourself knowing they cost that much (I assume if you thought it that important, you would already have tickets). In other words, you didn't necessarily value them at $234.

I guess it depends on how you offered to pay. Maybe he feels obligated to take your money...as not to hurt your feelings.

Don't let a misunderstanding screw up a friendship. Just tell him that you didn't realize how much they were when you offered to pay.

[911boost]

I would have read that as free as well.

Go and have fun with your son. I was in San Jose for work and went and saw my Wings play the Sharks. I couldn't believe they walked around selling sushi. I wanted nachos and a beer!

Bill