A buddy is hiding a new motorcycle from his wife in my garage.

[Rick Lee]

This is going to be interesting. A high school buddy I hadn't seen since graduation moved to Scottsdale a year ago. He got the bug for a bike real bad after seeing me on mine a few times. It was a non-starter with his wife and he gave up trying to convince her. He has two small kids too. Finally he bought a Suzuki GXR 750 on Wed., even got a loan so his wife wouldn't see the funds withdrawn from their account and wants the paperwork for everything sent to my address. I went with him to do the deal and he was too scared to ride it back to my house. So I rode it. Now it's sitting in my garage. He just came by to go for his first ride ever in traffic. He did ok, but was slow and nervous. Now he's headed home in his car and says he won't tell the wife until her mother comes to visit from Korea in about a month. His reasoning is that his wife will be working again by then, so she'll need her car. He's back in school and that's 25 miles away from their house. And his mother in-law will need his car to shuttle the kids around. So he needs the bike to get back and forth for school.

Money is not an issue for them, so the fuel savings doesn't make for an argument. He's really wrestling with this, but figures it's better to ask forgiveness than permission. Makes sense to me, but going to such lengths to hide this from her for a month is going to be hard to forgive. And I suspect I'll be the target of some of her wrath as well. Though I cautioned him all along about lying to his wife. Still, I didn't put my foot down and say I wouldn't help him. So I'm kind of guilty too. God forbid he gets hurt before he tells his wife and I have to explain this all to her. What a mess. Will keep this updated.

[widgeon13]

This is not going to be pretty.

[Gooch1971]

this is not going to be pretty.

+1

[motion]

Poor guy... sounds like a great life.

[JJ 911SC]

Rick

Oh yeah, this is going to be interesting...

When you mix wife, kids and I want a motorcycle sparks will fly.

As for the "ask forgiveness rather than permission", he would have a better chance if he had bought a new 911

Good luck and hopefully you will not become Collateral Damage

[GH85Carrera]

Nothing good will come of that purchase.

[aigel]

Strange way to deal with your spouse. You either respect her veto (not unreasonable IMHO on a MC if you have small children) or you go ignore it, be a man and face the music immediately. This behind the back stuff is childish and very bad for a relationship IMHO. Will make the spouse lose trust quickly. She will wonder in the future what he is hiding next? I.e. Rick? Will you let his new GF move in too until it is convenient for your buddy to tell his wife?

G

[aigel]

I know why you helped. You like the MC and hope for a great deal when he is forced to sell it on the spot! LOL!!!

Not sure if it is a good idea to wait for the MIL to come visit to break the news. He may have two ladies open a can of whopass on him.

G

[recycled sixtie]

This is a killer situation. You are part of the problem. Tell him to get some more life insurance because he is a dead man anyway. Wifey can claim if he gets killed on the bike. If wifey kills him, she probably can't claim. A train wreck about to happen. I did the same about 5 years ago with my 99 Miata. And drove it right home. 4 years later she complained there were no heated seats or air. cond. Soooo..... I went out and bought a 2001 Boxster with aircond. and heated seats. She has stoppped whining now. Till the next time. Tell your friend to man up..

[dennis in se pa]

If he wanted one he should have just gotten it and taken it home. This is childish deception. Not the mark of a good relationship.

[Baz]

I gotta agree with G ^^^

This amounts to disrespect.

I'm sure their team dynamic is not what it should be or this wouldn't have been necessary.

[GH85Carrera]

Originally Posted by dennis in se pa

If he wanted one he should have just gotten it and taken it home. This is childish deception. Not the mark of a good relationship.

Yep. You nailed it.

[azasadny]

What a sad way to live...

[recycled sixtie]

Originally Posted by Baz

I gotta agree with G ^^^

This amounts to disrespect.

I'm sure their team dynamic is not what it should be or this wouldn't have been necessary.

Yes but sometimes talking about it ends up getting nowhere.....
soooo what do you do ? Buy it anyway or not buy it?

[dennis in se pa]

"soooo what do you do ? Buy it anyway or not buy it?"

Buy it - life is too short. Unless it is not financially OK, but that has already been stated as OK.

[aigel]

Originally Posted by dennis in se pa

"soooo what do you do ? Buy it anyway or not buy it?"

Buy it - life is too short. Unless it is not financially OK, but that has already been stated as OK.

Yes, buy it and ride it home to the wife. What is he gaining by hiding it for a month or two?

I also think some things can wait in life - MC riding is a high risk activity and if you have small kids it isn't a crazy request from a spouse to wait until the kids are older. Compromise? How about a 500 hp ragtop car?

G

[JJ 911SC]

Originally Posted by recycled sixtie

Yes but sometimes talking about it ends up getting nowhere.....
soooo what do you do ? Buy it anyway or not buy it?

Here is the way to do it;

Dream of a 911 for 45 years... all the way back to 1963 when it was introduced at the Internationale Automobil-Ausstellung.

Mentioned that I like to have one to my wife from the day we got marry, 16 years ago.

3 years ago, she send me a link to a Kijiji Porsche for sale and that was it

[dennis in se pa]

"MC riding is a high risk activity and if you have small kids it isn't a crazy request from a spouse to wait until the kids are older."

I agree. I had a bike from the time I moved out of the house until my second child arrived at age 42. I got married late. My family depended on me and I wanted to meet my responsibilities.

Now the kids are grown I know I am too slow mentally and physically to enjoy riding like I did, so no more motorcycles for me.

[JavaBrewer]

I agree with all the comments - especially those from dennis. Years ago I was chomping to get back into street bikes and the wife was not supportive. Well after 6 months of trying to convince her I just went out and got one. Rode home with it immediately. Sure my wife as not terribly excited about it but in the end it all worked out fine. At least I was honest with her and she appreciated that. When confronted by the wives of our friend network my wife basically said "He's a grown man. He can make his own decisions". I realize not all relationships work that way - I am fortunate.

Bottom line - Rick's friend is totally blowing it. He also mentioned the wife's Mom is in Korea. Is the wife Korean? From my personal experience Korean women tend to run a pretty tight ship at home. Roles are clearly defined and not easy to break. That works awesome most of the time - in this case maybe not so much? YMMV.

[stomachmonkey]

We did something similar in HS, I told my parents Steve was leaving his bike at our house because of his parents, Tim told his parents the same about mine, Tim's lived at Steve's. We were all 16 and not legal to ride but back then no one got a bike license, least not where I lived.

The only comment from my wife when I think about getting another is "fine, just up the life insurance first"

Kids act one way, adults another.

I think you'll be helping your friend sell that thing before too long.