Missing chick Hearn

[sammyg2]

A mention on another thread got me thinking about chick and instead of hijacking, I started a new one dedicated to the chickster who called 3338 consecutive Lakers games without missing a minute.

Here are some things to jog the memories:

Chickism

The particular phrases that Chick used during his broadcasts were labeled "Chickisms". Many are now staples of basketball.


20 foot lay-up: A jump shot by Jamaal Wilkes.
Air-ball: An errant shot that fails to touch either the rim or the backboard.
(He sent that one back) Air-mail Special!: A strongly blocked shot, often sent high into the stands.
Bloooows the layup! : Missed a very easy layup.
Boo-birds: Fans who boo their own team when they play badly.
(He did the) bunny hop in the pea patch: He was called for traveling.
(You could) call it with Braille: An easy call for an official, e.g. a blatant foul.
(He got) caught with his hand in the cookie jar: A reaching foul.
(The) charity stripe: The free throw line.
(That player is in) civilians: The player is not in uniform.
(He's got 'em) covered like the rug on your floor: Really good one-on-one defense.
(They) couldn't beat the Sisters of Mercy: The team is getting beat badly.
(They) couldn't throw a pea into the ocean: The team's shooting is really awful.
(It'll) count if it goes ...: A player that is fouled in the act of shooting, or alternatively gets off a shot just before the buzzer sounded. It go-o-o-oes!: The shot is successful.
(That shot) didn't draw iron: A shot which misses the rim, but hits the backboard. Sometimes he would add but it drew a lot of flies.
Dime store score: A 10 to 5 score.
Dribble-drive: A player drives the basket while dribbling.
Finger roll: A shot where the ball rolls off the shooter's fingers.
(He) fly-swatted (that one): A shot blocked with force and authority.
Football score: A score resembling one often seen in a football game (e.g., 21-14).
(He threw up a) frozen rope: A shot with a very flat trajectory.
(We're) high above the western sideline: Chick's perch at the Forum, from which he called his "word's eye view" of the game.
Hippity-hops the dribble: A player dribbling the ball does a little hop step.
I'll bet you an ice cream: Hearn and Keith Erickson (his one-time color commentator) often bet ice creams on the outcome of a shot or game.
(He's got) ice-water in his veins: When a player hits a clutch free throw.
(It's) First and ten: Multiple players are sprawled on the floor after a physical play or diving for the ball.
(It's) garbage time: The (often sloppily played) final minutes when reserve players get a chance to play in a game that's out of reach (after it is in the refrigerator).
Give and Go: A player passes the ball, makes a quick cut, and receives a return pass.
(In & out,) heart-brrrreak!: A shot that appears to go in, but rattles off the rim and misses. Sometimes it went in so far you could read the Commissioner's name from below.
He has two chances, slim and none, and slim just left the building: The player has no chance of success with this play.
If that goes in, I'm walking home: Similar to a prayer, when the opponent shoots a shot that is a prayer, a streak, or some amazing shot. (Usually on the road)
Leapin' Lena: A shot made while the player is in the air and off balance.
Marge could have made that shot: A missed shot that was so easy, Hearn's wife Marge could have made it. Marge was often referred to when a player messed up something that was easy.
Matador Defense: Poor defense that allows their opponent to drive uncontested through the lane to the basket.
(There are) lots of referees in the building, only 3 getting paid: The entire crowd acts as though they are the officials by disagreeing with a call.
(Like a) motorcycle in a motordrome: Ball spins several times around the inside of the rim, then drops through or goes "in & out".
Too much mustard on the hot dog: Describing a player attempting an unnecessarily showy, flashy play.
The mustard's off the hot dog: A player attempts an unnecessarily showy, flashy play which ends up in a turnover or otherwise unsuccessful, such as a missed dunk.
My grandmother could guard him, and she can't go to her left!: Said of a slow, out of shape, or hurt player.
Nervous time: When the final moments of a game are pressure-packed.
94-by-50 hunk of wood: The basketball court, based on the floor's dimensions. (Attacking 47 feet: The front court.)
No harm, no foul (no blood, no ambulance, no stitches): A no-call by an official when varying degrees of contact have occurred. (More adjectives means the non-call was more questionable.)
Not Phi Beta Kappa: Not a smart play.
...Since Hector was a pup A very long time (e.g., the Lakers haven't had the lead since Hector was a pup.)
He's in the Popcorn Machine (with butter and salt all over him): Meaning that a defender got faked into the air (and out of play) by an offensive player's pump fake. ("Popcorn Machine" is a reference to an actual popcorn machine in the old Los Angeles Sports Arena, which was near the basket, but far from the court. Thus, if the player went far out of play, he was in the "popcorn machine.") When Hearn guest starred as a mouse in the Garfield and Friends episode Basket Brawl, Odie literally runs into a popcorn machine.
(He's) on him like a postage stamp: Very tight defense.
Seventeen five-oh-five, standing at the Forum: When a play drew universal acclaim (17,505 was the seating capacity for the Inglewood Forum)
Slam dunk!: Hearn's most famous phrase; a powerful shot where a player forces the ball through the rim with one or both hands.
(He was) standing there, combing his hair: When a player uninvolved with the action comes up with the ball and gets an easy shot.
(He) takes him to the third floor and leaves him at the mezzanine: A move where an offensive player pump-fakes a defender and draws a foul from the leaping player.
Tattoo dribble: A player dribbling the ball while not moving, as though tattooing the floor with the ball, as he waits for the play to develop.

This game's in the refrigerator: the door is closed, the lights are out, the eggs are cooling, the butter's getting hard, and the Jell-O's jigglin'!: The game's outcome is set; only the final score is in question. Chick's variation on "the game's on ice."

Throws up a brick: When a player tosses up a particularly errant shot, particularly one that bounces off the front of the rim.
Throws up a prayer (...it's (or isn't) answered!!!): A wild shot that will need a miracle to score (and does or doesn't).
Ticky-tack: A foul called when very little contact has been made.
Triple-double: A player gets 10 or more (i.e. double digits) in three statistical categories: points, rebounds, assists, steals or blocked shots.
(On his) wallet: A player fell on his rear end. When Lynn Shackleford, color man 1970-77, who liked to sass his rather straitlaced senior partner, remarked once that a player had landed on his backside, Hearn admonished him in all seriousness, "That's his wallet."
Words-eye view: What listeners received while listening to Hearn call the game on the radio.
(He's) working on his Wrigleys. A player is chewing gum.
(He's) yo-yo-ing up and down: A player dribbles in one place as if he were playing with a yo-yo on a string.
(He's dribbling) left to right (or right to left) across your dial: To let people who were listening to radio know which direction the ball was going up the court.
(He's) alone, he sets, he fires, he gets!: Player not defended who stops, sets and shoots.

Nicknames for Laker players[edit]
Kareem Abdul-Jabbar: Cap, The Captain
Kobe Bryant: The Kid
Cedric Ceballos: Garbage Man
Wilt Chamberlain: Wilt the Stilt (Was given to Wilt by a newspaper writer during his high school years.)
Michael Cooper: Secretary of Defense
Vlade Divac: The Old Serb
Derek Fisher: Fish, D-Fish, The Bulldog
Rick Fox: Foxy
Gail Goodrich: Stumpy (because of his height) This nickname, frequently used by Hearn, was actually given to Goodrich by Elgin Baylor.
Connie Hawkins: The Hawk
Robert Horry: Big Shot Rob
Rod Hundley: Hot Rod
Magic Johnson: The Magic Man, Buck, Mag
Eddie Jones: Fast Eddie, Steady Eddie, The Pickpocket, No Sweat Eddie
Eddie Jordan: Thief of Baghdad
Jim McMillian: Jimmy Mac
George Mikan: Mr. Basketball
Norm Nixon: Stormin' Norman
Shaquille O'Neal: Big Fella
Sam Perkins: Smooth
Kurt Rambis: Superman: (because of his safety glasses)
Byron Scott: Rook
Sedale Threatt: The Thief
Nick Van Exel: Nick the Quick, Nick Van Excellent
Jerry West: Mr. Clutch, Zeke from Cabin Creek
Jamaal Wilkes: Uncle Silk
James Worthy: Big Game James

Memorable calls[edit]


And the crowd stands for Kareem to get the ball. Everybody's waving their arms...it's in to Kareem. Kareem swing left...right-hand twelve-footer...GOOD!

— -calling Kareem Abdul-Jabbar's NBA record 31,420th point, pushing him past Wilt Chamberlain as the league's all-time leading scorer.


The new king of scoring has ascended his throne.

— -Shortly after Kareem's record-breaking basket.



To the left goes Magic...he's got it. He didn't shoot it...five seconds left. Magic down the middle, just what I thought. A hook shot at twelve, GOOD! Two seconds left! The Lakers take the lead on Magic Johnson's running sky-hook! Hooie!

— -calling Magic Johnson's "junior sky-hook" in Game 4 of the 1987 NBA Finals.


Portland can put the champagne away and get out the bottled water, 'cause that's all they're gonna drink on their way home!

— -calling the Lakers' comeback against the Portland Trail Blazers in Game 7 of the 2000 Western Conference Finals.

[Noah930]

Between Chick, Bob Miller, and Vin Scully, we've been blessed with the three best sportscasters of all time.

[Nostril Cheese]

Good post.

Showtime was a great time for basketball.

[astrochex]

Chick was the best. I loved that he called the game objectively, when the Lakers sucked he would say it; when the opponent was great he gave them credit.

Announcers today are so preoccupied with their stories about the game that they neglect to call the game.

[Tobra]

I have always hated the Lakers, but always loved Mr Hearn

[ted]

enjoyed how he called the games.

the door is closed, the lights are out, the eggs are cooling, the butter's getting hard, and the Jell-O's jigglin'!: