Got hauled into HR today, nervous as hell

[gorthar]

Originally Posted by 302340

Employee: Hi! I'd like know more about the 401K program!

HR: Go to the company website.

Employee: Ok. I also need to know about my health coverage.

HR: Go the the website.

Employee: How about overtime and vacation?

HR: Website.

Employee: How do I log on?

HR: Talk to IT.

etc. ...

Most HR people are there because their yoga degree didn't pay off like they hoped.

Lee

Oh you nailed it. Half the time these bozos can't help you with anything..,never call when they say they will, etc.

[bob deluke]

I used to call them "Inhuman Resources" hated those bastards. Worked over 50 years, can honestly say I never met or dealt with any reasonable person working in that department. Glad I"m retired. Feel sorry for folks who have to deal with those trolls.....

[aap1966]

Originally Posted by bob deluke

I used to call them "Inhuman Resources" hated those bastards. Worked over 50 years, can honestly say I never met or dealt with any reasonable person working in that department. Glad I"m retired. Feel sorry for folks who have to deal with those trolls.....

Come on, they do serve to expand your vocabulary.
Where else can you learn how to use nouns as verbs?

"Let's workshop the problem", not "fix the problem"
"We should action this", not "do this", etc

[jyl]

I've been hauled into HR twice in 35 years, both times I walked out with a termination date

[oldE]

Then there was the managers' meeting when HR was addressing us about procedures in different circumstances. One of them used the phrase "out placed ". I asked her what that was supposed to mean. She of course asked me what I thought it meant. My response was a series of words like "fired, axed, terminated, **** canned ". Yes. I had an attitude by that time.
Twenty years before, I recall her predecessor referring to union contract negotiations as "that dog and pony show ".That woman probably did more to destroy working relationships within the company than anyone else.
Best
Les

[pavulon]

Originally Posted by aap1966

Come on, they do serve to expand your vocabulary.
Where else can you learn how to use nouns as verbs?

"Let's workshop the problem", not "fix the problem"
"We should action this", not "do this", etc

Yes. When your work is utter BS, buzzwords put creamcheese frosting on your schitzcake...but it's still schitzcake. HR has become the internal analog of marketing.

[epbrown]

My favorite HR story. My boss and I are called in and I'm told I threatened to harm an employee. "What?!" Turns out someone not in my dept. was walking by as one of my team asked about something and I told them the info was confidential. "What's that mean." "That means I could tell you, but then I'd have to kill you." The passerby reported me.

My boss looks at the HR rep: "And you couldn't explain to that dumbass that it's just an expression? You had to call us down here and waste my time?"

[legion]

Originally Posted by pavulon

Yes. When your work is utter BS, buzzwords put creamcheese frosting on your schitzcake...but it's still schitzcake. HR has become the internal analog of marketing.

[Macroni]

what a bounce of whiners...... how did you ever get hired......O yeah HR.......

[pavulon]

Originally Posted by Macroni

what a bounce of whiners...... how did you ever get hired......O yeah HR.......

Director of HR at Pizza Hut?

[legion]

[Macroni]

Originally Posted by legion

I dealt with HR when I was hired 16 years ago. Not since.

I have been called into my boss's office on short notice a few times. Always turns out to be something unspectacular.

Life in the real world......