This is pretty screwed up (parents)

[porsche4life]

Originally Posted by mepstein

Or we could show some compassion for a young child trying to find their way, even if we don't have a complete understanding of the situation.

Amen. Like I said, being a kid is confusing enough without a bunch of people telling you that you are wrong to feel the way you feel.

[DonDavis]

Wait, is the student or the teacher changing genders?

Teacher? During the school year? For 5th graders? Extremely poor timing. Calls for a school board discussion. Leaning toward dismissal, or transfer at minimum.

Student? Tough conversation.

[scottmandue]

Originally Posted by DonDavis

Wait, is the student or the teacher changing genders?

I'm not clear on that either.

[Tervuren]

Originally Posted by mepstein

Or we could show some compassion for a young child trying to find their way, even if we don't have a complete understanding of the situation.

Apply this standard to every idea a kid has.

How does it work out?

Play in the street?

Jump of a multi story building?

Leap into the ocean tied to an anchor?

There are lots of things kid may want or desire that in the long run it is best if you make an attempt to curb it. That is the truly compassionate path.

And what happens if he wants to be considered a different age, he was born into a body too young?

[MBAtarga]

The little kid student has decided they want to switch genders.

[Tervuren]

it is my observation that parenting should have a goal in mind of the life the child will live when the parent is gone.

Some decisions while difficult now and require conflict can save a life time of trouble down the road. This seems to be one of those situations.

[epbrown]

Originally Posted by oldE

I worked last summer with a young trans person who was born female but said he knew by age ten he was a boy in a girl's body. Mom was out of the picture and dad was a red neck whose take on the situation was : you can't be a guy because you're not into cars. His family was not supportive and did everything they could think of to "change his mind ". He said it wasn't a choice.

I believe that. When I was growing up there was a kid down the street that clearly was like this, long before it was talked about. His parents were content to leave him be, and as kids I don't remember him being hassled for playing with dolls and jacks rather than playing stickball with the boys. He'd been like that all our young lives.

However, if my 10 year old suddenly told me he or she was trans, one thing I'd want before doing an update on the birth announcement cards ("Turns out, it's a BOY!") is get a professional opinion, rather than just take the word of someone still arguing over which is the best Power Ranger.

[scottmandue]

Originally Posted by epbrown

However, if my 10 year old suddenly told me he or she was trans, one thing I'd want before doing an update on the birth announcement cards ("Turns out, it's a BOY!") is get a professional opinion, rather than just take the word of someone still arguing over which is the best Power Ranger.

^^^This... I understand there are transgender folks but I think today parents are too quick to jump to conclusions.

Billy picks up a doll "he's a girl!"
Sally plays with a tonka truck "she's a boy!"

[look 171]

I haven't had time to real all the post, but thanks for not senting this to PARF. Real men play there, I stay here in the kiddy pool, like Vash once said.

That was all the info I got from my little boy. Nothing more and I am not going to make a big deal out of it

Sad all the way around that the parents acted that way. Its a little person at age 10. To young to worry about this crap IMO. Maybe they have already done studies with the professionals, who knows? Why is it necessary to announce that to the public? In this case, the classroom. I think no 10 year olds should be made aware if their classmate is a trans or not.

[john70t]

At 10, I want to grow up and be Batman.
And that's who I am today...except for all the stalking and assault charges.

Kids are always kids: Experiment with everything. Making mistakes. Pushing the limits. Figuring things out.
Some keep experimenting and changing their entire lives (like Bowie/Madonna).

Making permanent surgical decisions at that age?.......just no.

[pwd72s]

Originally Posted by scottmandue

^^^This... I understand there are transgender folks but I think today parents are too quick to jump to conclusions.

Billy picks up a doll "he's a girl!"
Sally plays with a tonka truck "she's a boy!"

Amen to that. I loved baseball, and flag football as a kid. In our small town, pre Jr. high days, no tackle football until high school. I also enjoyed playing jacks with a girl cousin. Man, she had the fastest hands I've seen. Later in life, when both able to enter alcohol establishments, she'd murder me in foosball.

Not enough letting kids be kids these days. Too much psychobabble causing parents to worry about things.

[wdfifteen]

Originally Posted by porsche4life

Amen. Like I said, being a kid is confusing enough without a bunch of people telling you that you are wrong to feel the way you feel.

+1
But, I would say something along the lines of, "There will be lots of things going on in your mind and body over the next few years. Don't go with your immediate feelings, because they can, and probably will change from time to time, sometimes day to day. Give yourself time to grow up."

I just want to comment that I'm proud of this board. This is a subject that often elicits knee-jerk reactions one way or the other and a lot of heated "discussion" that goes nowhere. A lot of thought has gone into most of the comments here.
There are adults in the room.

[Fly Mach .86]

I realized years ago, I am just a lesbian trapped in a man's body. LOL

[Eric Coffey]

Originally Posted by varmint

C\that kid “chose” to be transgendered the way a cat chooses to be vegan.

It’s the ****ed up parents calling the shots.

I'd agree that is the biggest factor, either directly or indirectly. I would bet that if that kid had never been introduced to the subject, and had never heard the word "transgender", it wouldn't have even been a thought in her mind.

It's a predictable outcome when one combines lax/bad parenting and the attention-seeking behavior of a child. Parents are supposed to be parents. Direction, education, moral/ethical guidance, motivation, discipline, etc.
It's not about being your 10 y.o. kid's "friend" who lets them "be whatever they want to be" (while consciously or unconsciously indoctrinating them to be what they want them to be).
It's probably not intentionally selfish or neglectful in most cases, just misguided.

[ckelly78z]

Originally Posted by porsche4life

I’m sure this will be an unpopular opinion here but....


Who says this isn’t totally the kids idea? And honestly let them live their life. If they are just asking to be called a different name and recognized differently, how does that in anyway affect your child’s education?

Now think about what that kid is going through. Being a kid is confusing enough, without wondering if you were born with the right bits. If they are struggling to figure that out, I think it’s our duty as the adults in the room to make sure that they feel as comfortable in their own skin, and in their school and home lives as we can.

NO, that's not the way this should play out, someone put this idea into that poor kids head, and we all, as a society have to accept, and coddle their dream ? NO !

Call me old fashioned, and rigid, but god only put two genders on this earth, and that is determined by what you were even before you were born.

[Eric Coffey]

Originally Posted by wdfifteen

That being said, at 10 (5th grade) it seems like waiting and watching the kid’s development is more appropriate that jumping to changing gender assignment. I think some of the kids are questioning their gender because it’s been talked about and in the news, and maybe a bit of peer pressure. I don’t think most kids at the age of 10 are mentally and emotionally prepared to make such decisions.

+1

Only to add/clarify: Assuming it's legit (and not just attention-seeking behavior), then It's not really a "decision" one makes anyway, but the result of a mental disorder.
Trying to normalize, champion, or force social acceptance for gender dysphoria is akin to doing the same for anorexia, schizophrenia, or any other mental illness.

[Eric Coffey]

Originally Posted by scottmandue

^^^This... I understand there are transgender folks but I think today parents are too quick to jump to conclusions.

Billy picks up a doll "he's a girl!"
Sally plays with a tonka truck "she's a boy!"

Another +1.

Muddying the waters further by conflating gender dysphoria with the masculine/feminine spectrum in both sexes is likely a large contributing factor to the "social acceptance" (and misunderstanding) of the issue.
IOW, being a tom-boy girl or an effeminate boy, does not make one "transgender", or any of the other current (socially-contorted) "gender" distinctions/definitions.
Then there are those that confuse the matter even further by trying to relate it to gay vs. straight, which it has nothing to do with.

[Clint Lando]

Originally Posted by ckelly78z

NO, that's not the way this should play out, someone put this idea into that poor kids head, and we all, as a society have to accept, and coddle their dream ? NO !

Call me old fashioned, and rigid, but god only put two genders on this earth, and that is determined by what you were even before you were born.

Yes.

[oldE]

So, what would you do if your ten year old daughter came to you and your wife and advised you she doesn't want you to freak out, but she has known for a while that she is a boy in a girl's body?
I can only speak to a few cases, but the trans people I have met did not do it for a lark and suggesting it was a frivolous act is denying the hell they have been through.
Grant me the serenity to accept what I cannot change, the strength to change what I must and the wisdom to know the difference.

Best
Les

[porsche tech]

Originally Posted by oldE

So, what would you do if your ten year old daughter came to you and your wife and advised you she doesn't want you to freak out, but she has known for a while that she is a boy in a girl's body?
I can only speak to a few cases, but the trans people I have met did not do it for a lark and suggesting it was a frivolous act is denying the hell they have been through.
Grant me the serenity to accept what I cannot change, the strength to change what I must and the wisdom to know the difference.

Best
Les

How about getting her a DNA test?