Depression and suicide

[Racerbvd]

My brother sat under a bridge and blew his head off with a shotgun.

[crustychief]

I hope you and your family find peace.

[sc_rufctr]

Originally Posted by Racerbvd

My brother sat under a bridge and blew his head off with a shotgun.

You have my condolences. RIP...

[wdfifteen]

My condolences to all here who have lost a friend or loved one to depression. It is worse than other deaths because it is so hard to understand.

What we expect out of life is up to us, but it’s hard to give up what we want. Most of the world would be happy with a full belly and no threat of dying in the night, but it seems the more you have, the more you expect. I am not depressed, but I’m often angry about my lot in life. I have developed arthritis and I’m in pain all the time. I can’t do what I expected to do in my retirement because of it and it pisses me the hell off. But I have a gorgeous loving wife, a great son and grandchildren, I'm healthy otherwise, and I have plenty of material wealth – I’m living among the top few percent of people in the world no matter how you measure it. And I still get pissed off.
So I can see how people who go in the direction of depression instead of anger can get as wrong-headed as I do about their lot in life.
Those with brain chemistry imbalances are in a different category. My old accountant was very depressed. He once told me, “If they gave me a pill that would instantly make everything right I would look at it and think, ‘why bother.’”
Hard to explain, or understand.

[KFC911]

Originally Posted by Racerbvd

My brother sat under a bridge and blew his head off with a shotgun.

Wow . My condolences and peace to you all...

[Baz]

Depression is a horrible affliction. There are so many who have it. Most know they do and most around them do not.

Most people don't understand it. They don't even know what to tell anyone with it - except I hope you get help.

This is not a personal attack against anyone here as much as just me sharing my thoughts.

We're complicated animals.

Take care of yourselves....

[Jeff Higgins]

True happiness must be one of the most elusive commodities on earth. Conversely, depression is all too common. There seems to be little correlation to wealth or poverty, success or failure, love or rejection, good friendships or loneliness, or any of the "measures" we apply to our lives. People who "have it all" are not immune from depression, where in many cases those who "have" the least have happiness. Like Baz says, "we're complicated animals". We are the only animals "intelligent" enough, or "sentient" enough to decide we no longer want to live. What a burden to carry.

[cabmandone]

Lost two friends to depression. I'll never fully understand it and consider myself lucky I don't suffer from it.

[vash]

Terrible news. I wish your family the best and I hope your BIL finds peace and tranquillity.

[Por_sha911]

I had a friend who was considered "successful" who killed himself. In his case it seemed like an act of revenge to his soon to be ex-wife who left him after she was caught having an affair.
Suicide counselors say that usually, suicide is done on impulse. Not that there weren't problems or it wasn't dwelt upon in the past, but rather that they just have a really overwhelming moment and make a rash decision.
Help your family and yourself to go through the grieving process in a healthy way and seek counseling if needed. Sometimes all it takes is one or two sessions to sort yourself out.
Prayers for the widow and the family.

[cantdrv55]

Thank you all. We had a family gathering tonight at my BIL's place to console my SIL and my nephew. We're going to be torn up for a while but we'll get through this together. Time heals all wounds.

[pwd72s]

Originally Posted by cantdrv55

Thank you all. We had a family gathering tonight at my BIL's place to console my SIL and my nephew. We're going to be torn up for a while but we'll get through this together. Time heals all wounds.

Time at least makes the wounds hurt less. Hang in there.

[tabs]

It is very convient to call it depression..you. have to lay it at some door to make sense of it. It is not that simple deal with it.

Everybody suffers from. DEEEPRESSION..you dog dies you got depression, you lose your job you got depression, your wife leaves you you got depression, you get a b on the exam you got depression...

So the question becomes what do you do with your deeepression. How do ya roll with it...

Part of it is that you learn your coping skills from your family.

[rfuerst911sc]

So sorry for ALL that have chimed in here that have had this tragedy hit them personally . I'm no expert but I believe many ( not all ) people that have depression are what I would call " functioning " depressed . Kind of like functioning alcoholics . They go about their business day to day with little to no outward appearance that anything is wrong . When this is the case a lot of the people that could have helped or wanted to help just don't know there is/was an issue . How many times have you heard about someone that committed suicide " he/she was a quiet person " or something similar ? No obvious signs that something is wrong , the hurting person is just good at hiding or masking it . It is a tough situation to deal with for all involved .

[Gretch]

those left behind must be very conflicted.

[sc_rufctr]

Originally Posted by Gretch

those left behind must be very conflicted.

That's how it is for the people I know who have gone through this and it never goes away.

I've been lucky. Not one person close to me has committed suicide but I had a friend who died from an "accidental" overdose.
His family suffered deeply and there was lots of gossip about what really happened.

[Gretch]

I know a couple of folks who experienced this. One guy's best friend and another's teenage son.

I cannot imagine what they feel.

[wayner]

I feel for everyone who has been touched by an event such as this.

Hopefully this video can be shared in a way that it gets in front of at least one person who it can help. What happens after cannot be fixed. But maybe, just maybe in at least one case it can be prevented by the person themselves by watching this.

I don't believe that others should carry the guilt of not having prevented it or seeing the signs.
Its not your fault. Given out ability to hide things, you did the best you could do not knowing, and you couldn't have know.

The biggest message I think in this video is that our lives are not ours to take. Our lives belong to those in our lives.

Take care
Be kind to yourself

https://youtu.be/qmKtyeQ9Ikk

[VINMAN]

A few years ago, a guy in my firehouse hung himself at home. An hour earlier, he was at our dept Christmas party, laughing it up having a great time with everyone, being his usual outgoing self.
We were clueless.
He had went through a divorce earlier, but never really showed a single sign.

[KFC911]

Originally Posted by Gretch

I know a couple of folks who experienced this. One guy's best friend and another's teenage son.

I cannot imagine what they feel.

Byron's post hurts me 'cause it takes me back in time...when i lived in Jax, awesome coworker (smokin' hot) single mom's 14 yr old son....sweet kid, played volleyball with 'em quite a few times....

She went into work one Sun evening for a couple of hours...came home...found him....same method....damn.....tears

......had to return...

Time doesn't heal that ....be well guys...talk to someone....us....anybody.....more tears.

Gotta leave this thread behind....