Depression and suicide

[pwd72s]

Originally Posted by Rednine11

my live in GF of 2 year committed suicide in my house. I found her........please help the family if there is anything you can do just be there.

Damn! Sage advice from one who has been there...

[911 Rod]

My condolences.
Reading this thread lets us all know how lucky we are.

[Racerbvd]

Ok, I'll chime in again, as I have suffered from depression (diagnosed) for over 20 years, a few years it 2as really bad, as I would drink until I passed out, could not leave the house, didn't smile for literally 10 years. I went through all different types of medications before they found something that helped, even a little bit.
I never had the desire to kill myself, but I also didn't care if I lived. I hate being in crowds or groups, but I force myself, this includes working environment. Am I better now, somewhat but that Monkey is still on my back and I literally have to push myself to do public things. And yes, as recently as last week I was fighting those feelings , and from the outside, no one would think I'm depressed, I mean good looking, successful, have cool cars and other toys. I have lived a good life and had opportunities that many others could only dream of. So yes, I'm a face of depression.

[tabs]

Originally Posted by Racerbvd

Ok, I'll chime in again, as I have suffered from depression (diagnosed) for over 20 years, a few years it 2as really bad, as I would drink until I passed out, could not leave the house, didn't smile for literally 10 years. I went through all different types of medications before they found something that helped, even a little bit.
I never had the desire to kill myself, but I also didn't care if I lived. I hate being in crowds or groups, but I force myself, this includes working environment. Am I better now, somewhat but that Monkey is still on my back and I literally have to push myself to do public things. And yes, as recently as last week I was fighting those feelings , and from the outside, no one would think I'm depressed, I mean good looking, successful, have cool cars and other toys. I have lived a good life and had opportunities that many others could only dream of. So yes, I'm a face of depression.

When the very people you love don't give a dam whether you are there or not..you wind up feeling let down and have no reason to do anything. So you do what you need to do to get by.

There is a lot of disapontment and pain when you are not given a dam about, that you can't totally escape from because it is a given. It is the cards you are dealt. You recouncil yourself to that fact and carry on the best you can.

[Rednine11]

Racerbvd:
Obviously I deal with depression as well. always remember about all your friends here on Pelican too.. you can always lean on us...if you get depressed and or just plain bored shoot me a msg directly if you want I will always take time to talk. anytime any topics. Depression is a very real and very serious problem. in severe cases that talk could save a life. in fact I would be married right now.

[pwd72s]

Some days it's damned hard to NOT allow depression in. It gets tougher to do as you age. Just got back from the local clinic, a cute young PA talking on all the things wrong with me, ordering more meds changes.

Made me wonder why I'm bothering to hang around..knowing it's a downhill from here...able to do and enjoy less & less as time passes.

But, I know this current feeling will pass...it always does.

So, can only imagine the hell of feeling depressed 24/7...

[Baz]

On the subject of suicide, this movie has stuck with me through the years.

Ordinary People garnered four Oscars for 1980, including the Academy Award for Best Picture. The picture, Robert Redford's debut at directing, won him the Academy Award for Best Director. Alvin Sargent won the Academy Award for Best Adapted Screenplay. Timothy Hutton won the Academy Award for Best Supporting Actor in his first film role (he had previously appeared on television).

[Evans, Marv]

Originally Posted by pwd72s

Some days it's damned hard to NOT allow depression in. It gets tougher to do as you age. Just got back from the local clinic, a cute young PA talking on all the things wrong with me, ordering more meds changes.

Made me wonder why I'm bothering to hang around..knowing it's a downhill from here...able to do and enjoy less & less as time passes.

But, I know this current feeling will pass...it always does.

So, can only imagine the hell of feeling depressed 24/7...

I can relate to this, even though I'm lucky enough to only take cholesterol and light blood pressure meds at my age. I can imagine older people becoming depressed and wondering about continuing to "hang around." It is nothing but a down hill trip without chance for change. There is sometimes an overwhelming attitude of BTDT that keeps you from looking forward to doing things. You look around and see that you're "out of the game" in so many respects and will never have a chance to get back in. When my grandmother was going down hill at 96, I talked to her doctor. He said she was depressed. At that time I was wondering what she had to be depressed about, since she was well taken care of and in physically decent shape for her age. Now as I get older, I'm gaining some insight.

[vash]

Originally Posted by pwd72s

Some days it's damned hard to NOT allow depression in. It gets tougher to do as you age. Just got back from the local clinic, a cute young PA talking on all the things wrong with me, ordering more meds changes.

Made me wonder why I'm bothering to hang around..knowing it's a downhill from here...able to do and enjoy less & less as time passes.

But, I know this current feeling will pass...it always does.

So, can only imagine the hell of feeling depressed 24/7...

this actually isnt depression. it's being sad for a predicament. sure.
i was actually confused about the difference and mentioned it to my doc. she sent me to a depression workshop. it was 6-7 evening classes, one day a week. i didnt miss a single one. it was clear early on, i was not clinically depressed. i was sad about some stupid event (coincidentally, i cant even remember the event anymore). i stuck it out, just to learn a thing or two.

some of the people in my class..yea, a group hug and a high-five wasnt gonna cut it. they had magical thinking, etc. real deep dark depression. your mind playing jokes on you. eye opening.

i think i'll recongnize it if it strikes me. i hope so. right now. group hug OR an high-five, i'm good.

[jhynesrockmtn]

I was adopted at birth and found my birth families 25 years ago. Great relationship with my birth mother and siblings. I found my birth fathers family. He committed suicide about 8 months after I was born. The situation with me was a factor. It's hard not to feel a bit guilty about being on this earth 55 years later. The wounds of how he died still run deep in the surviving members of his family. Be well and take care of those affected including yourself!

[tabs]

Originally Posted by wayner

Tabs, it seems that this thread is really close to home.

You have my condolences, and I am sorry for your loss

Wayne

Thank you for your condolences..

Jack was a rock solid friend for 27 years. He had a good life, where his heart just wore out..He stuck around until he just couldn't anymore.

On Sunday night I had a dream of Death coming, he looked like the actor Tim Roth dressed in gray cloths.. I told my friend Francis about it on Monday 5/13. On Wednesday my friends wife called me to tell me Jack had died.

It was a bit perplexing to me because I have never had a dream quite like that one before. On Wednesday I found out why.


As you grow into old age you become much more aware of your own mortality, and the ever increasing physical frailty. So it is not really a depression..it is part of the emotional process of the stage of life you are in.