suicide

[Danimal16]

Originally Posted by milt

Well, that news is extraordinary in a bad way. I'm sorry to hear this.

I had to say something to show care before addressing something else here. I don't think tabs is that far off as the danimal says:



Sounds to me that both may have some personal experience.

Milt,

Your right. The hell of it is that we can't lump all folks into a single stereo type. The folks that I knew were not substance abusers and did not go into the local Macdonald's and waste the place. This is the case of a person that gets at a point in life where they cannot, for God knows what reasons, handle it anymore. Down and out is one thing, being blue is part in part the same, but there is a dark place that unless one has been there is very hard to explain. Just saying that someone needs to get real or cut the crap does not lend a full understanding of the problem or problems that one goes through that would bring them to such a point.

My concern comes with how many cases of doing oneself in is prevented by another person either recognizing the signs or just happens to say the right thing. But that is a statistic that is darn near impossible to measure as the bad is prevented without anyone knowing it. So buckle up and suck it up are not for the vast majority of human beings, that is something that many may have but I believe that everyone has a breaking point, everyone.

[Danimal16]

Originally Posted by 9dreizig

Well what I've learned through this whole process is you often can't see it coming.. and clearly it's mental illness that nobody can possibly understand why they would do it.. both of these people were loved by everyone around them.. I'm just happy that both of my sons have independently said " that's never the answer" I worry about the scars that this has left on my brother his wife and son, and my ex wife. I'm sure everyone else will be fine, I'm just not sure losing a spouse or child is ever totally recoverable......

I feel for you and your family. Take care of each other, although it sounds like that is your focus. My first wife, Sue, lost a sister this way. It has been many years but it did impact her family even to this day. Very sad. The focus on the positive is very important. It just seems that some of the youngsters face pressures that we may not have or that they think we may not be able to relate with them. Again, much luck and healing to your family, words just don't seem enough.

[Buckterrier]

I'm truly sorry to hear of your losses. Thank God your kids were in their mid 20's vs. young teenagers or worse. At least they have some sort of idea about life in general at this point. I know this isn't very comforting now but that scar tissue may come in handy down the road as their lives continue to move forward.
God bless you and your family.

[Math]

My best friend's mom hanged herself when he was 14, 15 years ago. him and his brother found her and unhook her. We never talk about it but the guy is deeply scarred. they were 4 children and you can see the different effects it had on them, in different ways, My friend is a no fear whatsoever guy, always doing something extreme, defying death. his sister has been in hospital for schizophrenia. his little brother is deep into drugs.
suicide is very sad, both for the peoples who see it as a solution and the ones that are left behind.

[Oh Haha]

The scars remain, deeper for some, I suppose.

After your post about the MSU niece, I called my oldest sister to talk to her about my BIL.

She told me that my Mom told her at the time that it was like losing a son again. Because of the situation I was in at the time, I didn't talk to anyone much about it except to explain what happened.

Now, 10+ years on from my own depths of depression, I know that, had I done the same thing, my family would have been put through hell. (Me being here has been enough they may tell you but that's another story.)

Again, my thoughts, prayers, and condolences to your entire family.

[nynor]

i am sorry to hear about your loss.

my sister hung herself last april. in a closet. she was 21 and nearly 6 feet tall, so hanging herself in the closet took some doing.

my father found her a couple of days later (they were out of town) and cut her down. i think that her suicide may kill him. i think he has given up.

apparently everyone but me knew that she was troubled. i am the black sheep of the family, so no one ever tells me anything. it sure brought out a bunch of latent strangeness in a lot of relationships. i was exhausted all the time, emotionally, until about two weeks ago.

i think that a person has the right to do that. i wish they didn't do it, though.

[Seric]

My condolences, depression and suicide are truly nasty things.

Take care.

[Rick V]

I have a very close friend who is getting out of a bad marage. It was so bad that she tried to get out by overdoseing, twice. She has spoken to me about it and even though she has done her best to try and describe where she was at those points, I still can't get a grip on the depth of despair that would drive a person to such a drastic end. I guess unless you have been there there is no understanding. I am just glad she failed.

[Oh Haha]

Nynor,

I have to ask.
What occurred 2 weeks ago? Something good, I hope?

I offer my condolences on your loss. Black sheep or not, she was your sister.

[nynor]

Originally Posted by Oh Haha

Nynor,

I have to ask.
What occurred 2 weeks ago? Something good, I hope?

I offer my condolences on your loss. Black sheep or not, she was your sister.

i have been going to school and doing clinical rotations as well. i've been at the limit and then that happened. it took that long for me to not be both physically tired and emotionally exhausted. honestly, i don't know. i just moved past it a little.

thanks, man. and thanks to the original poster for bringing it up.

[Oh Haha]

Hang in there, my friend.

[aap1966]

Originally Posted by Danimal16

My concern comes with how many cases of doing oneself in is prevented by another person either recognizing the signs or just happens to say the right thing.

Spot on.
Never underestimate a kind word, you may have no idea as to how important it is to the person.

[elwood-914]

Originally Posted by Tim Walsh

It seems to happen to the people you least expect. I had a coworker/friend of mine take his life just a month or two ago, and even the day before we were talking about stripping one of his turbo dodges down to be the ultimate track rat, or an ITA car.(He was a regular corner worker for nonSCCA events at VIR) Nobody saw it coming, and having battled those demons before, that's it's still tough to spot...

In my case work was the one place where I didn't dwell on my depression, it was an escape, so no one knew my pain. When I went home the depression would sink in again. You never hear about it because a depressed person keeps it inside. At least this is what happened to me after my divorce.
I'm a lot happier now

[craigster59]

I would just like to weigh in on my original post and reiterate about the "contagiousness' of suicide, especially among teens. When it touches your friends/family, keep a watch because it can suggest an alternative for those already experiencing depression and be a catalyst to attempt or carry out what they might have been contemplating.

My condolences to 9dreizig, Oh haha, nynor, Strupgolf and those that have gone through this. A lot of unanswered questions and pain but we can all get through it.