Originally Posted by GH85Carrera (Post 6668754)

Max, you are a lot like I was at your age as far as the dating and socializing aspect. I have never liked the bar scene mostly because of cigarette smoke. I just can't stand to be in a smoky bar. Back in the olden days when I was dating almost everyone smoked in the bars. I quickly learned if you meet a girl in a bar she will want to go back, a lot. All the chicks at bars were professional drinkers, not social drinkers.

I would go for several months at a time with no real social life because I got into another hobby that had few if any women. Astronomy, model airplanes, computers, cars, and so many of my hobbies had almost no females. I counted once and came up with 18 hobbies.

Chasing women is the most expensive of all the hobbies. It was real easy to blow a year's tire budget for autocrossing on a few dates, and I am NOT talking about hookers. :)

I dated a lot of very different women. From the earth mother new age hippy types, school teachers, veterinarians, and scientific researchers. I learned I wanted an smart woman that could understand the world around them. A lady that can actually understand algebra, computers and carry on a conversation about something other the fashion or TV shows and movie stars.

The advice everyone tells you is to "be yourself" and that was what I was most puzzled by. How can I be anything but myself?

I finally understood that is means answer the questions honestly. If a girl asks if you like something or how you see things don't just try to tell them what you think they want to hear. You don't have to say RAP music sucks balls even though it does just let them know you don't want to go to see a RAP concert.

Originally Posted by Flieger (Post 6668762)

Dude, you just don't get it. I don't like that stuff. I never have had a drink, and I absolutely hate second hand smoke. I don't like the idea of altering one's perception with chemicals. It's not who I am.

That is part of the problem. I feel that I am fundamentally different from the vast majority of the college population.

Originally Posted by recycled sixtie (Post 6668777)

Different is good. :) No drink, no smoke. You will go far:)

Originally Posted by nynor (Post 6668781)

i often wonder who is lurking on this thread....

Originally Posted by GH85Carrera (Post 6668812)

I knew that all my activities seemed to have all men. I figured I needed to reverse that trend and try something that had a lot of women. I started going to a folk art dance club. I did not really care to dance, but the ratio of women to men was 10 to one. Once they knew I was single I was busy all the time. It is good excersize and the dancers were all in good shape, even the old cougars. And not one of them smoked.

Originally Posted by Flieger (Post 6668751)

How did this thread get to be all about me?:confused:

Originally Posted by Flieger (Post 6668762)

Dude, you just don't get it. I don't like that stuff. I never have had a drink, and I absolutely hate second hand smoke. I don't like the idea of altering one's perception with chemicals. It's not who I am.

Originally Posted by Flieger (Post 6668816)

Hmm. Interesting. I'll think about what I can find out here that would be like that.

Originally Posted by nynor (Post 6668725)

oh, yes we do. that dude on facebook needs a thrashing.

Originally Posted by Noah930 (Post 6668823)

'Cause talking about what makes you uncomfortable is more comfortable than talking about what makes us uncomfortable. :D



And at some point, you'll start to enjoy a drink just for the taste of it, itself. Instead of craving an ice-cold Coca Cola or glass of lemonade on a hot day, you might crave a certain beer. Drinking isn't just about getting drunk/buzzed. But if you don't like that stuff, that's fine, too.

If you're not willing/interested in going out of your way to meet chicks and just want to find those who are interested in what interests you, you can follow that direction, too. I used to bike a lot in grad school. OK, so maybe I didn't meet so many girls out climbing the fireroads in the foothills of Pasadena. But I certainly had the opportunity to meet random chicks riding my bike on the bike path between the Palisades and Palos Verdes. (Middle of the week was best.) They were out riding bikes and roller blading, too. If you want a chick who races cars, well, you're largely out of luck. But heck, show up at autocrosses or PCA events and see what happens. Unless you serendipidously assist some stranded female motorist on the side of Mul ( a la Joe), you're not likely to pick up any chicks strafing the corners of the hills of the 'bu with your dad riding shotgun.

Originally Posted by GH85Carrera (Post 6668825)

There are some goofy folk dances in this world. The instructor would pick a country and we would do the dances from different areas. Once you get over the shyness of dancing in public it is interesting to meet people from all walks of life.

Originally Posted by Flieger (Post 6668766)

I understand the advice about being myself, and that is exactly why I don't want to go to the bar to meet someone.