Let me know your preferred pronouns if I can’t tell by your gender by your name

[911 Rod]

When did this become a "thing"?
I didn't get the memo.

[masraum]

Originally Posted by vash

I'm with Tobra. if they let me know, good to go.

until then, sorry for stepping on anyone's sensitive bits.

[gtc]

Since you don't have your name or pronouns in your signature, i'm going to assume based on your screen name that you are a she/her... probably an old one... and likely driving a Prius.

Originally Posted by cantdrv55

This might get parfd, I don’t know. Anyway, my wife wrote to my son’s school principal and that person wrote back. Below her signature are her preferred pronouns. Her name is Brianna. I have no doubt that her pronouns are she/her. Brianna copied her colleague who then wrote back to my wife and did not include his or her pronouns. I have no friggin idea if that person is a male or female because the name is foreign. I think that’s about the only time disclosing your pronouns make any sense.

What are your thoughts about this?

[juanbenae]

slap that trick.... you'll know more then.

[Esel Mann]

Originally Posted by cantdrv55

This might get parfd, I don’t know. Anyway, my wife wrote to my son’s school principal and that person wrote back. Below her signature are her preferred pronouns. Her name is Brianna. I have no doubt that her pronouns are she/her. Brianna copied her colleague who then wrote back to my wife and did not include his or her pronouns. I have no friggin idea if that person is a male or female because the name is foreign. I think that’s about the only time disclosing your pronouns make any sense.

What are your thoughts about this?

Thx for asking for thoughts! One needs to branch out beyond periodicals such as Grit, and your hamlet free press to keep up with the world. Why just last recently, WSJ had some blurb about furries. That'll make you a scrabble pronoun x-pert!!!!

[WPOZZZ]

My neighbor has 2 kids, Hunter and Kaine. You tell me which is the boy.

[A930Rocket]

Originally Posted by masraum

Where I work, they sent an email out to everyone "inviting" us to add our pronouns if we want. It has gained some adoption, but it's not widespread.

Same for us. Being in construction, I suppose some corporate office people have added their pronoun, but nobody in the field has.

[cstreit]

You can easily write a response using neutral pronouns.

“We’ll if he/she says that..”. Simply becomes “”well if they say that…”

Having worked internationally for many years, this is mymdefaultmif I’m not sure,…

[john70t]

"They" is both 3rd person and plural.
If you call me that, I would have to check with Chuck and Buck also.

[matthewb0051]

Originally Posted by masraum

I used to address emails with "Gents" (assuming all male names), but I've converted to starting almost all emails with "Folks" or avoiding pronouns when I'm not sure.

22 years in the Army and I'm conditioned to the salutation in emails being: Ladies, Gentlemen, or Ladies and Gentlemen, sir or ma'am. If it is peers and I know the email could be forwarded Gents would work too. And the end is always R/ or VR/; meaning respectfully or very respectfully. Deviate from this at your own peril.

Now I deal with assistant DA's and sometimes use Ladies but feel a bit nervous doing so with these youngsters.

A friend posted some link on social media to her nieces or something. I look at their 2 profiles and saw something that was totally bizarre. Both had name, Bible verse, then their pronouns. Sort of conflicting messages if I'm honest. Again, kids these days

[masraum]

Originally Posted by matthewb0051

22 years in the Army and I'm conditioned to the salutation in emails being: Ladies, Gentlemen, or Ladies and Gentlemen, sir or ma'am. If it is peers and I know the email could be forwarded Gents would work too. And the end is always R/ or VR/; meaning respectfully or very respectfully. Deviate from this at your own peril.

Now I deal with assistant DA's and sometimes use Ladies but feel a bit nervous doing so with these youngsters.

I would probably not use "Folks" in a super formal environment. I feel like it's a little informal. Many years ago, I changed my salutation to "Thank you." I'm often asking someone for something, or possibly even more so when they've asked me for something especially if I can give them what they want, I feel like "thank you" helps to keep the other side happy.

A friend posted some link on social media to her nieces or something. I look at their 2 profiles and saw something that was totally bizarre. Both had name, Bible verse, then their pronouns. Sort of conflicting messages if I'm honest. Again, kids these days

Assuming their pronouns match their chromosomes, I assume they are just trying to fit in or something.

[masraum]

Originally Posted by Fast Freddy 944

Edited! Interesting thread.

and now this is headed to PARF...

Dude, don't bung up an otherwise unPARFy thread.

[aschen]

all this falls into who cares for me.

I have no idea why some are so sensitive about their pronouns, but if I can do the tiniest little thing to make them a bit more comfortable why not.

If I am confused if someone is a boy or girl on an email I don't have a problem asking. Big whoop. I am also fine using non gendered pro nouns in such a case.

If a person with a ding a ling wants to go by she/her I care precisely 0%, whatever floats yer boat as they say.

My name is sometimes mistaken for a girls name and often spelled with the girls conventional way, it doesnt even register as a bother to me.


Everyone (in the general sense) needs to lighten up a bit.

[Seahawk]

Let’s see if it can stay. FF I just deleted your posts...that is all.

[Scott R]

I was going to post about this, so I searched first, and here I am. I'm having a heck of a time in the last few months with pronouns. I'm trying to respect everyone, and honestly do what makes you happy.

Where I'm going to mess up is on Slack (instant messenger.) One of the first posts in this thread says he used "folks," Masurm, sorry wanted to accurately quote you. I was using "folks" today, I just noticed I'm doing it. Or just "people" all of the time.

I'm completely afraid to use "gents" as mentioned earlier, or my go-to "you guys" "those guys." It's just a matter of time before I offend a person. I've been in IT 30 years, maybe it's time to cash out. Most of my young co-workers give me looks when I pull out my reading glasses anyway.

Just ranting, thanks for the thread. No parf intended here.

[sc_rufctr]

I've steadily changed over the years... Now I don't assume anything about anyone. For instance when asking about someone's spouse I use the term partner instead of husband or wife.

About 6 months ago I met what I thought was obviously a lady (gorgeous looking, smoking hot bod etc.) but the person identified as a "they". As I got to know they, they told me they were born female but doesn't identify as one but also doesn't identify as a man. No judgement really but I tend to steer away from people like that.

The workplace has become a minefield. Stay away from HR if you can. For some reason silliness seems to thrive in that department.

[cstreit]

It’s just not that hard. I hear people whining that they can’t remember a few pronouns yet they can remember hundreds of,peoples,individual names and 37 phone numbers…

…but One extra set or pronouns? Too much. ��

[Hard-Deck]

I am: He/him/HMFIC/MOFO, and I identify as a GE-mini-gun

[Scott R]

Originally Posted by cstreit

It’s just not that hard. I hear people whining that they can’t remember a few pronouns yet they can remember hundreds of,peoples,individual names and 37 phone numbers…

…but One extra set or pronouns? Too much. ��

I'm getting better, I'm going to pocket "partner." Just not natural to me yet. Technical papers I write, articles etc, those are no brainers, and what I do. I'm saying I'm going to mess up on IM.

[masraum]

Originally Posted by Scott R

I was going to post about this, so I searched first, and here I am. I'm having a heck of a time in the last few months with pronouns. I'm trying to respect everyone, and honestly do what makes you happy.

Where I'm going to mess up is on Slack (instant messenger.) One of the first posts in this thread says he used "folks," Masurm, sorry wanted to accurately quote you. I was using "folks" today, I just noticed I'm doing it. Or just "people" all of the time.

I'm completely afraid to use "gents" as mentioned earlier, or my go-to "you guys" "those guys." It's just a matter of time before I offend a person. I've been in IT 30 years, maybe it's time to cash out. Most of my young co-workers give me looks when I pull out my reading glasses anyway.

Just ranting, thanks for the thread. No parf intended here.

"Gents" and "guys" - exactly why I use folks. hahah, yep, I'm in IT, and just north of 50.