i need a polite exit strategy for religious visitors

[Don Ro]

Originally posted by svandamme
they must have a black list or something, i never, ever saw any of them again...

You may be right - 'been 3 - 4 yrs. since they were here.

[Jared at Pelican Parts]

I tell them im a gay satanist.. That usually gets some really funny loks

[Groesbeck Hurricane]

My wife's old dog was WONDERFUL!!! He was partially blind and very quiet and friendly. He was a large Blue Collie with blue eyes. City folk always thought he was a wolf. He hated having someone take hold of his collar.

Modus operandi: go to door, Sterling followed, take hold of collar, Sterling leaned forward, open door, Sterling went to move closer to people on the other side.

Other side of the door, ring/knock, person opens door with LARGE dog pulling against the collar, no wagging tail, no barking, mouth closed. Salespersons/religious persons would beat a hasty retreat!!

Dog: Oh boy, someone at the door, maybe they have a treat or will pet me!!! He was always upset the people left without petting him.

For extra fun, my elderly (70's at the time) mother would answer the door holding Sterling.

Now I just tell them I'm Anglican, watch the blank stare for a moment, tell them to research it, and close the door.

[930addict]

My grandmother was an "inactive" mormon who chain smoked. One day the Missionaries came knocking at the door. She opened the door with cigarette in hand. They asked to come in and talk. Grandma took a big drag off her cigerette and, as she exhaled, said, "No, thanks I'm already mormon". That was one of the funniest things I've ever seen.

I don't like to be rude to people so depending on my mood I either don't answer the door or just tell them I'm not interested and close the door.

[Victor]

How should I react when this happens in my own family? My brother is a freakishly devout born again christian - last time we went for a visit, my 7 year old daughter was told she will burn in hell if she does not accept Jesus in her heart as Lord and saviour.

Folks like that should be nailed to a tree - and I have to go there for his 40th bday tomorrow.......

[svandamme]

if i had a kid, and my brother came up with crap like that to my kid
then he shouldn't cry about it when later on i start taking his kid out for some whiskey in a titty bar, just to broaden his horizon...

quid pro quo.

[930addict]

I would have a talk with your brother. Tell him that you don't appreciate those types of remarks and that if you cannot expect him to keep his religion to himself, he shouldn't expect you to be there for his family.

[djmcmath]

My Dad used to see the JW's coming down the driveway on Sunday afternoon's and meet them on the porch. Think winter in North Idaho, bunch of JW's in a minivan fresh from their gathering, so they're all wearing three-piece suits and hoping to get invited in for coffee. No such luck -- Dad would stand out on the porch in his warmest coat for as long as it took for the poor blokes to realize they'd freeze to death before they got invited inside, and they'd get back in their van and leave. They only came a few times before they realized that my Dad had studied at Dallas Theological and knew their material better than they did, and that he was really just toying with them.

[Victor]

It's been going on for decades - he was OK when he first joined (back in 1985) but seems to be getting more bitter and twisted as he is getting older. Get this, he refused to let his daughter come to my daughters 4th birthday party because the little girls wanted to dress as fairies....he thinks it "demonic".

[Dixie]

"You need to leave. The Rottweillers need to go out."

[scottmandue]

Originally posted by Kurt V
I answer the door naked.

I had a friend that did that, said it worked every time.

But you have to be pretty confident to pull that one off...

[kang]

On a more serious note, don’t open the door. Just ask “Who is it?” through the closed door. An answer to this question is not in their “script.” They have no choice but to answer “Jehovah’s Witnesses” or “I’m selling newspapers” or whatever. Respond with a “Not interested.” That’s it. Done. They are stuck looking at a closed door and just walk away. No insults and it doesn’t waste your time.

I tell my wife to do this for safety, as well. Who knows what nutcake is going to barge their way through an already open door when a single woman answers it?

On the other hand, if you have time to waste, mess with them all you want. I used to mess with phone solicitors when I had more time.

[Victor]

My wife tells them she is jewish - the last time she did that they spent a couple of seconds looking at the crucefix pendant hanging off her necklace and then just walked away.

We have more of a problem with telemarketing companies based out of india over here in Australia at the moment though. They don't have the same privacy laws as us and on some evenings can call up to 5 times in a row.

[KevinP73]

I tell them they are just in time for the AmWay meeting and invite them in.

[djmcmath]

Answer the door with blood on your hands, maybe your face, too. Use real blood if necessary, but fake blood works just as well. Give them your best "I'm batty" smile, eyes kind of wide, and comment darkly as you look from one to the other, "You're a little late, but," and look them up and down slowly, "You'll do just fine." Then invite them in.

[KevinP73]

Originally posted by Victor
We have more of a problem with telemarketing companies based out of india over here in Australia at the moment though. .

My favorite, I tell them They caught me in the middle of something and ask if they would hold on a minute till I finished. They always say yes so I lay the phone down in front of the tv and drop a porno in the dvd player. Then just go about my business for a while.

[Jims5543]

I have this bookmarked on my computer at work. If I see a telemarketer calling in on the caller ID I launch this board.

http://www.ebaumsworld.com/jacket1.html

Then I put the phone on speaker and click away.

One guy started laughing and playing along. Some get pretty wadded up and hang up.

[sammyg2]

You could be a complete a$$ as many of the previous posters recommend, or you could try the truth.

[EdT82SC]

Ask them, "You're here for the black mass?"

[trekkor]

You are not rejecting them . You are rejecting their message.
They don't take it personally.

If you don't want to be visited again, make it known.
Why be rude?


KT