"Man-Card" Violations

[scottmandue]

Originally posted by Rick V
Not being able to change a flat.....................like my Daughters biyfriend.
What a wuss.

biyfriend? is that a typo or a Freudian slip?

Over twenty years ago I was driving with a lady friend (she was driving) at night on a twisty road. All of a sudden we hear wump wump wump and the car is vibrating.
"Pull over"
"Huh... why?"
"You have a flat... pull over"
Fortunately her dad made sure she had a spare and a emergency kit.
I popped a flare, changed out the tire in five minutes.
She stood by with her mouth hanging open looking at me like I was from outer space.

Man card violation: Wearing anything that is more than fifty percent polyester.

[Dan in Pasadena]

Originally posted by ERAU944
i guess you guys can have my man card then. i'm so glad 'yall don't actually make the rules...

so, what if i was gay? is that grounds for revocation of my man-status?

I'll chime in since I started this thread. Nah, I don't have a problem with you being gay. I don't relate to it, but it isn't any of my business, doesn't harm me in any way.

But then I'm (more or less) a lefty, plenty of other guys here will now chime in and make this a gay vs. straight thread. "Gay" is only a perjorative (to me) if you're NOT gay. It isn't if you ARE gay; it's who you are.

There's a whole other (probably hilarious) thread for violations of the "gay card"!

[Racerbvd]

Here are a few;

Watching queer eye for the straight guy

Naming your car after a male model , loose More points if said car is a boxster.

Now this one kills me and it is true. A lady I know told me that her husband (now ex) was taking a t-shirt that he just bought back to the mall (ok, that is grounds right there) because he was worried that the phrase on it might get him beat up
I'm sorry, what kind of man does that or would even give that excuse????????

Having a newer Sportster, I'm sorry, that is a chick bike after the 80s

I'm sure that I'll think up a few more after a bit.

[scottmandue]

Come on guys the thread is a joke, stop taking it so seriously.

Miata's are great cars but this couldn't be the first time someone teased you about owning one.

[Seahawk]

Sorry Sports, but there is a a catch to all this "Man-Card" bravado Bravo Sierra, a get out of MC jail free pass:

In the day, if I was trying to get laid, and she was hot, your MC rules were waived: adios, buh-bye, see-yah, go watch the game alone you hump, I'm on a mission and if you can't see it none have been so blind, ta f'ing tah.

MC? No even today.

[scottmandue]

FWIW People also label Boxsters girly cars and I would love to own one.

Man card violation:
Changing the channel when women beach volleyball is on.

[Dan in Pasadena]

Originally posted by scottmandue
Come on guys the thread is a joke, stop taking it so seriously.

Miata's are great cars but this couldn't be the first time someone teased you about owning one.

+100. My whole point in posting the thread was to poke a bit of fun about ourselves.

My the way, if you have no sense of humor about your own "manliness"? - BIG man card violation.

Real men are full spectrum; we've got a sense of humor ESPECIALLY about ourselves.

[onewhippedpuppy]

Originally posted by Seahawk
Sorry Sports, but there is a a catch to all this "Man-Card" bravado Bravo Sierra, a get out of MC jail free pass:

In the day, if I was trying to get laid, and she was hot, your MC rules were waived: adios, buh-bye, see-yah, go watch the game alone you hump, I'm on a mission and if you can't see it none have been so blind, ta f'ing tah.

MC? No even today.

Agreed. Man law exemptions are granted when chasing tail. That's for you single folk out there.

[Porsche-O-Phile]

Do highly butch lesbians GET a man card?!?! The horror!

[lendaddy]

Originally posted by Porsche-O-Phile
Do highly butch lesbians GET a man card?!?! The horror!

I guess they would........interesting observation.

[Dan in Pasadena]

Originally posted by Racerbvd
... Having a newer Sportster, I'm sorry, that is a chick bike after the 80s

I tend to agree nowadays but if you are anywhere near my age you remember "Then Came Bronson" with Michael Parks (one of the MANY intended and failed James Dean replacements) and his red Sportster. I LIVED for that bike when I was a boy.

..........until my brother-in-law's best friend showed up with his brand new candy red with dual gold stripes '69 Honda 750 Four. To say it turned me on is the understatement of the decade. Talk about a MAN'S bike? At that time, oh man was that a stud bike.

P.S. That SAME bike is quietly rusting under a cover in that man's garage. Hasn't been started or ridden in decades. I could probably get it for $1000 and I keep thinking of it. I'm no longer a bike guy but would LOVE to do a bolt-by-bolt restoration of that one bike only. I'd never sell it. Its a dinosaur now but it'd make me 15 again just sitting on it. Back to the Man-card thing

[Tim Hancock]

Wearing a helmet to ride a Murray or Huffy bike around the neighborhood.

Wearing a life jacket in a standard row boat.

Asking for directions.

Paying someone to change your oil.

Cooking, vacuuming, dusting, doing dishes or laundry once you are married. (my poor dad just cannot get over the fact that I NEVER have done ANY of the above in ten years of marraige except dishes a couple times when the wife and kids were away for a week )

Changing diapers if married.

Driving a minivan as your daily driver.

Backing down from any physical challenge proposed by any woman (this one can cause some serious injuries, but none the less, to do otherwise would be a direct violation )

It is good to be a man

[artplumber]

Originally posted by scottmandue
FWIW People also label Boxsters girly cars and I would love to own one.

Man card violation:
Changing the channel when women beach volleyball is on.

Have you seen some of those manly girls? Much rather watch NOPI TV

[Ned nyna 11]

Guys,

I have a bit of a dilemma here since I have no doubt whatever that walking the poodle rates a BIG card but........It takes really big balls to do it so .......is it or isn't it????

I won't be guided by any response that I receive.

Happy New Year.

[Tim Hancock]

After giving it some thought....... I think the wife needs to walk the poodle during daylight hours.

[lendaddy]

Is it fullsize or toy?

[RANDY P]

listening or worse, dancing to anything called Techno. you become untouchable once you are caught listening to anything resembling House or Trance.

Or, thinking anything metrosexual is cool.

[Dan in Pasadena]

Originally posted by Ned nyna 11
Guys,

I have a bit of a dilemma here since I have no doubt whatever that walking the poodle rates a BIG card but........It takes really big balls to do it so .......is it or isn't it????

I won't be guided by any response that I receive.

Happy New Year.

I think walking a poodle is a man card violation. Walking a poodle that has one of those ridiculous poof ball trims or is dyed blue or pink is a man card revocation offense.

On the other hand, if you look like you could beat someone to death with his own leg that you ripped off him because he made fun of you for walking that dog would be a mitigating factor

Remember, there are mitigating factors to all man card violations. Especially the "Laid Rule".

[Rick V]

Watching Oprah, Dr. Phil, Montel etc.................Violation

[the]

Originally posted by RANDY P
listening or worse, dancing to anything called Techno. you become untouchable once you are caught listening to anything resembling House or Trance.

Or, thinking anything metrosexual is cool.

Even knowing what "House" or "Trance" is is possibly a violation.

Getting your hair cut by a "stylist" - violation. Getting your hair cut anywhere where at least Playboy isn't prominately offered for your perusal, violation.

Not knowing how to drive a manual tranny car, major violation.

In fact, not being able to operate all forms of motor transport (car, motorcycle, ATV, etc.) - violation.

Airplanes excluded, you don't need to know how to hop in a plane and fly it if you've never taken lessons. Although you know in your heart if the pilot on your flight died of a heart attack, you'd be able to land that 747 if someone on the ground was there to "talk you down," dammit!