I'm an evil bastard

[Aerkuld]

Sorry this is really long and honestly a bit of a rant, but...

As I've mentioned before, I entered divorce proceedings in January 2005. Among other things to come out of the first court hearing in March that year, my ex-wife was granted exclusive occupancy of our former home and was deemed responsible for the upkeep. It was also ruled by the court that the house was to be immediately listed for sale. If I tell you that after several more court hearings the final order was signed in February 2007 and the house was still not on the market then you'll get some idea of the frustration I have been dealing with in between.

Fortunately I have since managed to get the property listed, albeit for about thirty thousand below the original purchase price due to the condition it is now in from it not being maintained for two and a half years. Better still we have accepted an offer for the full asking price but it did require me to do a bit of work on the property which I have been doing and paying for what I cannot do myself. I was having a little trouble with my ex who was doing things such as turning the appraiser away and making access difficult for some of the contractors, but all in all probably 75% of the work has been done to date.

The sale has been set to close on June 5th, as detailed in the original offer which was signed by myself and my ex-wife at the end of April. Two weeks ago she started calling me and e-mailing our realtor saying that she won't be able to close on that date. Also she is having to return to the UK very soon to get her Visa approval stamped in her passport so that she can start her new job in August. I have been asking and asking when she will be travelling but she keeps telling me that they have nothing booked yet. She has already dropped hints that she won't sign the closing papers, so I have got a court order which will allow the receiver to be approved to close the deal on her behalf.
Now combine this with the trouble she is causing with the work required to close on the deal and you have me and my realtor with strong concerns that she will do whatever she can to make the deal fall through.

So what am I to do? Well, this is where I feel bad.
Finally today after lengthy discussion with my realtor and my attorney I served her with an eviction order. Now I feel terrible and she is having a field day going around telling everyone that she can find what a bastard I am for turning her and my son out onto the street.

Although I feel bad about doing this it isn't as if she hasn't had any idea that the house was going to be sold and that she is going to have to move out. She will probably be out of the house anyway, but I need to get reassurance for myself, my realtor and our buyers that the closing will go ahead.
What else am I going to do?

Sorry guys, but I feel better already.

[Groesbeck Hurricane]

Have her create a power of attorney specifically for closing the property, if it is legal in your area.

FWIW, once she gave the power of attorney I would go after having the funds frozen while you proved she failed to follow the court order. Recoup your losses.

From one sorry sob to another....

[Aerkuld]

Originally posted by Groesbeck Hurricane
Have her create a power of attorney specifically for closing the property, if it is legal in your area.

FWIW, once she gave the power of attorney I would go after having the funds frozen while you proved she failed to follow the court order. Recoup your losses.

From one sorry sob to another....

I have effectively had the court grant power of attorney to the receiver, the problem that I could see is that we'd get to June 5th and she'd still be in the house.

I was thinking about asking the court to grant me an increased proportion of the house proceeds to recover some of the costs I have incurred.

The thing is that I'm not really after the money, I just want to give her a clear message that I am done being screwed over by her.

[Groesbeck Hurricane]

Is it legal for you to take all her stuff out of the house and safely and gently put it in a storage location, give her the key, and you pay for the first month's storage?

Please, I don't mean to be cruel, but you will have to deal with this lovely young lady for many years to come. My ex lives in another country and still finds ways to annoy/pester. At least she has stopped trying to get joint credit accounts to run up...

[HardDrive]

I don't think you have done anything wrong Aerkuld. It sounds like your ex is being extremely immature.

[Aerkuld]

Funny you should mention it. I have one of those PODS arriving at her house tomorrow. I think that due to her performance I would have no trouble getting the Judge to allow me to do that if it comes to it. She hasn't really made any friends out of the local legal community. She's rude to the judge, rude to my attorney and has had two attorneys that were representing her bail on her, I assume because she didn't pay their bills.

I am trying to help, the eviction order is sort of a last resort back-up plan, something to keep in the back pocket if needed.

I am well aware that I will be putting up with this for a long time yet. I am on friendly terms with her previous ex and he keeps me entertained with her annoying e-mails to him.

I appreciate the advice though. Thanks!

[mattdavis11]

You have done well. I'd watch what goes into the POD while enjoying an adult beverage on the lawn.

[LeRoux Strydom]

Just make sure that you don't alienate your son in the process. Is he old enough for you to explain the situation to him? He may perceive it that you are turfing him out of the home.

[schamp]

Sounds like you have a good attorney. I would not feel bad. You have gone beyond the pale. I would ask for the monies you have expended to come out of closing. She I think becomes a tennant if she remains after closing and becomes the problem of the new owner if the new owner closes with her in it. I would evict her if I had to. Let the county sheriffs put her stuff on the curb. She will get the idea. Oh, get used to her sticking it to you. I would be concerned about her taking your son out of the country, or to her home country unless you divorce agreement prohibits it. Hope this works out for you.

[Joeaksa]

You have gone well beyond what was required and given her far too much time to comply with everything.

Would not feel the least bit bad but as noted above would really spend sometime with your son over this. Tell him the truth and do not "color" it in anyway against her, and he should couple it with his memories and realize who is in the right.

[MichiganMat]

There is love, and there is business. May the two never meet.

[Joeaksa]

Originally posted by MichiganMat
There is love, and there is business. May the two never meet.

Yes but many men cannot think with their upper head when a wife/girlfriend is involved.

Once we start thinking with our upper head and realizing that the two are different, things might change, but not before.

[Rick Lee]

Subscribing!

[MichiganMat]

Originally posted by Joeaksa
Yes but many men cannot think with their upper head when a wife/girlfriend is involved.

Once we start thinking with our upper head and realizing that the two are different, things might change, but not before.

Yeah, I've been experiencing a bit of that myself lately. Sometimes it seems logic is no match for sex, even bad sex. Strange. Me no understand!#@#%

[Aerkuld]

RESULT!!
Went to court this morning and it turned out pretty well.
We got the Judge to order her to sign power of attorney over to our realtor.
She has been ordered to vacate the property before closing.
I am authorized to remove anything left in the house and put it in storage at her expense.
If the house isn't left tidy or if anything is damaged then any incurred costs will be deducted from her share of the sale proceeds.
Also, she was trying to get me to pay for refilling the pool and the electricity to get it running prior to sale and this has been ordered to be deducted 50/50 from the sale proceeds.

Can't really get fairer than that.

I will take the opportunity to talk with my son, but to be honest I don't think he has been corrupted by her stories yet. I will make sure he knows what's what.

Schamp - I have been very pleased with my attorney and would recommend him to anyone unfortunate enough to need one. He has been fairly expensive (name one that isn't) but does the job very well. At first I thought he was very abbrupt and difficult to deal with but I have come to see that it's just his way of cutting through the crap. If I think he's difficult to deal with then it works in my favor when we're in the court room and the opposing attorney or my ex has to deal with him, he just walks all over them.

[Joeaksa]

Glad to see it worked out. 50/50 is more than fair considering the way she has been playing games with you, but then thats not unusual in a lot of cases like this.

My ex did the same and the court spanked her in the end. Only winners were the two lawyers who drew the event out over the course of 5 years time...

[Groesbeck Hurricane]

I am going to ask a very tough question: Can you get custody of your son? Does ex have ability to move somewhere you cannot enforce visitation (like Ukraine, China, France)?

If I were you, I would get with my attorney now, while you have the current judge, and see if there is anyway to get full or joint custody. The ex does not really matter, Your Son does!!

I've been through something similar and hope for the best for you!!

[Aerkuld]

I already have joint custody and the only place that she could realistically move to is Britain, but I know she has a job lined up here for August and she is very keen to stay in the USA.
I have been thinking about trying for full custody, even more so as she carries on like this. I am having serious doubts about her mental capacity, and I'm not joking. The only thing that I can see as a problem is the advice early on from my attorney. It may be a Georgia thing, but he told me that it is very difficult for a father to gain custody and unless you have concrete proof of a serious problem with the mother, such as drug use or alcoholism then it is a long shot at best. I don't think just being an obnoxious cow will cut it.
Still, I will see how things progress and it may become a more pressing issue.

[Porsche-O-Phile]

All is fair in love and war.

This is war.

There is no such thing as "overkill" in war.

[cool_chick]

Originally posted by Aerkuld
RESULT!!
Went to court this morning and it turned out pretty well.
We got the Judge to order her to sign power of attorney over to our realtor.
She has been ordered to vacate the property before closing.
I am authorized to remove anything left in the house and put it in storage at her expense.
If the house isn't left tidy or if anything is damaged then any incurred costs will be deducted from her share of the sale proceeds.
Also, she was trying to get me to pay for refilling the pool and the electricity to get it running prior to sale and this has been ordered to be deducted 50/50 from the sale proceeds.

Can't really get fairer than that.

I will take the opportunity to talk with my son, but to be honest I don't think he has been corrupted by her stories yet. I will make sure he knows what's what.

Schamp - I have been very pleased with my attorney and would recommend him to anyone unfortunate enough to need one. He has been fairly expensive (name one that isn't) but does the job very well. At first I thought he was very abbrupt and difficult to deal with but I have come to see that it's just his way of cutting through the crap. If I think he's difficult to deal with then it works in my favor when we're in the court room and the opposing attorney or my ex has to deal with him, he just walks all over them.

That's awesome. It's only fair. You earned it too by hard work. IMO, just because a woman is a woman doesn't mean she's more entitled or anything beyond what she put in.

I would like to caution one thing, however. Not saying that you will, I don't know you, but just in case, but I would advise not to speak ill of your ex-wife to your son. It only causes damage to the child. No matter what, that child loves both his parents. I just wish more women would wake up and realize the ones they're hurting the most when they do that shyt is the children. For a lifetime.