Serious family issue. need advice

[Gogar]

First,

How old are you? I mean, how much older than the stepdaughter are you?

My $.02

She's doing it because she KNOWS nothing will ever come of it. She's in her early 20's. That's what they do. She wants to get you all riled up so she can inflate her sense of self esteem. At age 20ish sex is one of the only tools she knows how to effectively use, so that's what you're getting. She hasn't learned how to use her "smart" or her "money" or her "kick your ass" power yet.

If you EVER EVER try to do anything (anything naughty) about it, she will freak and creep out because she NEVER EVER expected it from FAMILY. Are you kidding? She will tell her mom, and hello divorce, hello embarrassment, hello smaller bank account. Hello one bedroom apartment.

So anyway, realize that it's NOT REAL and tell her to stop it, because it's annoying you and her mom.

[Joeaksa]

Originally Posted by hitched1

Still at home, so tough to keep away from. Trust me I have never even made the slight advance or even suggestive anything towards her. We are good friends , we do alot together, enjoy the same music, activties, etc... We have alot in common. Maybe shes just become too comfortable around me? I dont know.

Reinforce how much you love her Mother and let the daughter know that several times, or whenever it can be brought up in a conversation.

Remind yourself how much you love your wife and dammit think with your upper head. No matter what do not allow yourself to get in a situation where something happens. It WOULD be the end of your marriage and a substancial part of your assets.

[juanbenae]

i have an idea who our step papa may be, and he has not answered the thread yet for cover..... cant believe it has not come up yet...

T$

[Moses]

Originally Posted by Gogar

First,

How old are you? I mean, how much older than the stepdaughter are you?

My $.02

She's doing it because she KNOWS nothing will ever come of it. She's in her early 20's. That's what they do. She wants to get you all riled up so she can inflate her sense of self esteem. At age 20ish sex is one of the only tools she knows how to effectively use, so that's what you're getting. She hasn't learned how to use her "smart" or her "money" or her "kick your ass" power yet.

If you EVER EVER try to do anything (anything naughty) about it, she will freak and creep out because she NEVER EVER expected it from FAMILY. Are you kidding? She will tell her mom, and hello divorce, hello embarrassment, hello smaller bank account. Hello one bedroom apartment.

So anyway, realize that it's NOT REAL and tell her to stop it, because it's annoying you and her mom.

'zactly

[austin552]

Either way you are going to have to get something straight between you.

sorry.

[berettafan]

you should be pissed that the ***** doesn't respect the relationship you and your wife have. she's being a piece of trash. this girl isn't worth anybody's time, and most certainly not yours.

we all know a hot chick can get dick anywhere she choses so the only explanation for your situation is that she is effing with you just for kicks and self esteem. i repeat that you should be pissed.

[Aerkuld]

I have to agree with the guys that think she is messing with you, maybe not even intentionally, and nothing would ever come of it anyway. Just ignore it and get on with what ever you were doing before. I can imagine that the temptation is there to see just how far it could go, even if you never let it get to the point of no return, but it really isn't worth it.
Credit to you for even noticing. I normally have no idea when a chick is trying it on.
Of course I'd be more that happy to take her off your hands.

[hitched1]

[QUOTE=Gogar;3395406]First,
How old are you? I mean, how much older than the stepdaughter are you?
QUOTE]
I'm 41 shes 24. She recently landed a good job and is looking for a place.
Once again let me stress, NOTHING has ever happened. She has never made an outright pass. Nor have I. Like I said It just seems like shes too comfortable around me sometimes. Nothing more.
Maybe its just my paranoia. The main reason it is bothering me is because someone brought it up to me a number of times( a female friend of ours). It never really seemed like anything before that.

[Aerkuld]

So is the step daughter flirty with you in front of other people? What about in front of your wife?
Can't you ask the female friend to bring up the subject of "Do you think your daughter seems to be very flirty around your husband?"

[hitched1]

I dont want it brought up around my wife. I think most of you are right . it will just go away on its own.

[turbo6bar]

+1 to most comments and I feel the need to reiterate the threesome theme:

"Well I, uh, I'm not sure how you pronounce it or anything, but I believe it's ménage à trois?"
George Castanza

[the]

It sounds like she needs to be taught a lesson.

So next time she comes on to you, dim the lights, get your Marvin on, then have your wife pop out of the closet wearing nothing but a very revealing negligee and talking about how a mother/daughter 3-some has always been her fantasy.

That ought to scar the daughter sufficiently for life.

[Super_Dave_D]

QUOTE]
The main reason it is bothering me is because someone brought it up to me a number of times( a female friend of ours). It never really seemed like anything before that.[/QUOTE]

Oh now the truth comes out - the female friend wants you and is jealous!! Man you have it bad!!!

[Paul K]

Do you want to hit it? That's the most important question. Be honest...

[hitched1]

Originally Posted by Super_Dave_D

QUOTE]
The main reason it is bothering me is because someone brought it up to me a number of times( a female friend of ours). It never really seemed like anything before that.

Oh now the truth comes out - the female friend wants you and is jealous!! Man you have it bad!!![/QUOTE]

LMAO No thats not the case and NO I dont want to hit it!

[Sonic dB]

Just don't do anything. Live life normally. Forget about any thoughts
that you have of this woman. She is probably just Yankin your Chain
around a little bit...and she is probably not serious about doing you.

So, just move forward. No thinking about her, especially not when you
are with your wife.

We dont want to see you on Dr. Phil or worse, Jerry Springer show....

[hitched1]

I have truely absolutely no intentions whatsoever. trust me

[JavaBrewer]

Originally Posted by Paul K

Do you want to hit it? That's the most important question. Be honest...

Men, in the right circumstances, want to hit just about anything. That is being honest.

hitched, if you seriously love your wife, and your marrige, this would not even be up for discussion. Shut the girl down and move on. If you don't...well then you lose...

[lendaddy]

Originally Posted by hitched1

...and NO I dont want to hit it!

Yea, this is where you lose me. Without question you want to hit it, a 40 something guy feels pursued by a hot 20 something (of non-blood origins) and you claim to not want to hit it? Yea, not buyin' it. Hell, most of us want to hit it and we've never even seen her.

I think what you mean is "I don't want....to want to hit it.", which is much more honest.

The desire is chemical, it's what we do that matters.

[widgeon13]

Sounds like you have a good relationship with the stepdaughter as well as your wife, perhaps you are a little guilty your stepdaughter feels so close to you. Just be a gentleman and don't even allow yourself to get close to the "LINE" and all will be fine. You are the mature one, she just enjoys the opportunity to flirt a little or whatever you want to call it.

As Ann Landers would tell you "Don't fuch up a good thing" keep your pecker in your pants and hands in your pockets! In the long run, you will all be happier for it, otherwise you will really screw up on a number of fronts.

As some others have stated, you don't want to end up on the Jerry Springer show.