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guys, I think I found "the one"..
Or at least a woman capable of actually being the one. Maybe not the only one, but a one.
I met a woman quite a long time ago through some mutual friends. This was, eh, maybe 6 years ago. I would see her every now and then with some girls she hung out with, several of which I think I probably dated and this is why I knew the 'group'. I was always curious in her since she seemed so... I dunno.. different, quirky, cool, nice, funny... pretty much everything you'd want to be around. Last two or three years we've gone out on and off. She lives about an hour and a half away, goes to college.. We've been 'dating' you could say more and more frequently until this month when I now see her every week. I have this amazing attraction to her and everything she does. I find myself in the situations where I can just sit on the couch and watch her talk about random things and it mesmerizes me. Past girlfriends were all good women but it usually ended up being mostly physical attraction and thus spiraled down into a sex-driven hell hole were we end up hating each other. This girl is totally different. If you've ever see "High Fidelity" with John Cusack, she would be represented well by Catherine Zeta Jones' character. I think the thing that made me think "this is the one. this is the woman" is when, last weekend, I'm doing a clutch job on the 924S when she calls. I said I was 10 hours into a 20 hour clutch job and she jumped in her car and came and helped me out. I mean got down on the floor under the car and helped me out. At 2AM. And she knows nothing, jack nothing about Porsches. Yep.... this is the girl. She's coming to stay with me for a few days soon. This may or may not be a turning point. My biggest fear/problem is that I still have yet to initiate this relationship past what would currently be described as a deep male-female friendship. Which as many of you know is possibly the worst position to be in. The thing that makes this different is she seems like she could be eager to move this to the next level... So PPOT braintrust.... think I can do it? Think I can overcome all odds and put this one in the bag without destroying a relationship? I know that TTIWWOP, and maybe I will get you all some eventually, but right now I don't want to let on a lot as she's damn good and finding things on the internet. |
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I hope it works out. Tom |
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She like you man. You like her. See where it goes. |
sounds nice. take it to the next step. keep going slow and steady.
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Don't rush it, follow your heart and just enjoy being around her. Any girl who wants to help you change a clutch is pretty rare. She probably digs you too.
pics or ban.. |
Can she drink like you?
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Sounds good so far. Congratulations!
I am damaged goods from previous relationships so my advice is very biased, stemming from living with a psychopath. Hence, my "please just take your time and make sure this is a good person" is probably most of the time a no-brainer. Good luck! Oh and whats that saying I here about "Pics or Ban". :D |
Wait, you said you dated which implies something of the sort of a 'good night kiss' at least (otherwise it ain't a date) and then you say you haven't initiated more than a strong friendship.
I'm confused - maybe it's because I'm not supposed to be awake right now. I dunno. Sounds like you're in the friend zone. Hard to get out of there, it's like being stuck in the sand at the beach in a truck with no weight on the rear wheels and not really knowing that's the problem. Once you do realize it - you have to figure out how to get some weight on there... |
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You're correcto on the friend zone. We've not shared anything but a few goodnight kisses and hugs sorta deal. I have no carnal knowledge of this girl as of yet. In my mind I can only hope she's been thinking the same thing I have for the last month. Which is why the hell haven't we hooked up yet. It's just a touchier spot than I've ever been in because, in my past relationships, it usually started with the hooking up part and the relationship part developed later. That is probably why they all failed. Like you said, I gotta get some weight on there. Find a way out of the friend zone and into the more intimate zone. I'm too used to one night stands. This is a long term goal, a little more fragile. My life is one long seinfeld episode. |
Well, if you've had a good night kiss - then you're not exactly in the friend zone. If she's kiss you on the cheek - well - that isn't a good night kiss.
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It's friend zone, trust me. Let's just say we haven't shared a good goodnight kiss. Usually when I see her goodbye it's just 'next time we'll go...' and hugs a few times and see ya..
I'm thinking an semi-spontaneous romantic dinner one night... some italian food, wine, and go for it. She says she wants to come visit me here.. If she travels to my place to stay this weekend there is the inevitable mathematical deduction of the fact that I only have one bed. She's smart, she knows this. Again- I think there was a seinfeld episode that covered this... I just never had to work out of a hole like this before. |
Jermaine: It's just that I think she might be the one.
Bret: Sally? Jermaine: Yeah. Bret: What makes you think that? Jermaine: You just know. When it happens to you you'll know. Bret: You said Michelle was the one. Jermaine: Yeah, she's the one. Bret: You said Claire was the one. Jermaine: She's another one. Bret: So you have more than one one? Jermaine: Some people are lucky, I've had a few ones. Bret: So how many ones can you have? Jermaine: Five. Bret: How many have you had? Jermaine: Three. How many have you had? Bret: Just one. Just one. :D |
Ha. It is Wednesday:
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Don't push it, just let it take it's natural course. If it was meant to be it will be, if not so be it.
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Have you heard of the ladder theory? Google it.
Good luck with the weekend! Pics or it didn't happen! |
Good luck! I found the "right one" for me about 25 years ago and we've been happily married for almost 23 years. I couldn't imagine my life without her...
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Ask yourself do you love her? If the answer is yes tell her so.
I talked to a woman who has been married to the same guy for about 40 years...she told me that this was the guy who told her he loved her, told her she was a good person, hugged her and reassured her when she needed some reassurence. In other words he was there for her when she needed some comfort and love. This woman btw owns her own insurance biz in Ventura CA. so is no basket case. |
This board is a hoot.........
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This clashes with the theory that I should tell her we can't be friends because I find her too attractive to be just a friend. :-) |
Is there any other guy in her life right now? Has she talked about anybody else or is she trying to "get over" someone else. Does she not want to "complicate" her life right now with a relationship?
Otherwise, she's bringing her toothbrush and a change of panties... To do that and still want to be friends is just cruel. |
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