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Registered
Join Date: Mar 2004
Location: Higgs Field
Posts: 22,633
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Impulsive Gastronomic Question
Another thread got me thinking. I have a question for you guys. Or at least......I wonder if anyone here understand what I'm about to report:
I've never had a serious thought in my life. Sure, I suffer from gas and heartburn, but I've never considered changing my diet. Maybe it has to do with my problem of not eating properly, and not caring about what I eat, as I reported in a thread here a few months ago. At any rate, I just have never worried about my own suffering, and so I have never considered ending the suffering. I digress. I have a fear of closed spaces, but that's not the reason I will not walk into an elevator or phone booth. The reason I will not walk into an elevator or phone booth is because I am afraid I will fart. It's not that I want to kill myself. The reason I feel like farting is hard to explain. I see the opportunity. I realize that farting is something that, in a flash, with little effort, I could easily accomplish. And I feel a sort of impulse. If I were to fart, it would truly be just a random, senseless thing. Purely senseless and impulsive. But the impulse is there. I once met someone who understood this impulse. Anybody here?
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Jeff '72 911T 3.0 MFI '93 Ducati 900 Super Sport "God invented whiskey so the Irish wouldn't rule the world" |
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05-04-2010, 03:39 PM
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Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: Long Beach CA, the sewer by the sea.
Posts: 37,792
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First there's the "higgins" on the shower floor and now this. I'd say you have to be eating some funky food.
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05-04-2010, 04:04 PM
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Used Up User
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'87 Carrera Cab ----- “Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former.” A. Einstein ----- |
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05-04-2010, 04:19 PM
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"YOU CANT RACE A CAB."
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i knew there was a reason why theres a hole in the ozone layer right above lynwood washington.
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05-04-2010, 04:22 PM
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Formerly reformed
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Rutherfordton NC
Posts: 2,424
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I once cleaned out a high school art room with the same weapon you now hold. Use it wisely, my son . . .
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1968 911P (Paperweight) |
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05-04-2010, 04:24 PM
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Senior Member
Join Date: Feb 2000
Location: Lacey, WA. USA
Posts: 25,310
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I have the same feeling this morning that I had in fifth grade when Jeff Jensen hit me on the back of the head with a spitwad during class. Thank's, Jeff.
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Man of Carbon Fiber (stronger than steel) Mocha 1978 911SC. "Coco" |
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05-05-2010, 06:55 AM
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Registered
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: Magnolia State
Posts: 7,548
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When there are two people on an elevator and one farts, both know who it was.--Ancient Mexican Proverb
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Jim 1987 Carrera 2002 BMW 525ti 1997 Buell Cyclone cafe project 1998 Buell S1W: "Angriest motorcycle I've ever ridden." |
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05-05-2010, 10:20 AM
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Registered
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Capital Region, NY
Posts: 688
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A half teaspoon of baking soda in an 8 oz glass of water helps lasso my gas. Worth a try. Been doing it forever.
 87 blk coupe |
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05-05-2010, 10:34 AM
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N-Gruppe doesn't exist
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: *%@#ing GPS, where am I? Oh wait I see the Space Needle.
Posts: 4,394
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i didnt want to say anything, but now that you mention it. scooter did wake up looking a little green every morning last week.
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Ted '70 911T 3.0L "SKIPPY" R-Gruppe #477 '73 914 2.0L SOLD bye bye "lil SMOKEY"  "Silence is Golden, but duct tape is SILVER.” other flat fours:'77 VWBus 2.0L & 2002 ImprezaTS 2.5L |
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05-05-2010, 12:49 PM
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Registered
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Kenbridge VA
Posts: 4,283
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You want gas quit smoking. I thought my wife was going to make me start smoking again.
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Peppy 2011 BMW 335d 1988 Targa 3.4 2001 Jetta TDI dead 1982 Chevette Diesel SOLD
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05-05-2010, 01:20 PM
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1987 Porsche 911 Carrera Cabriolet 3.2
