He couldn't lead a platoon of cowards in a downhill retreat!

"Busier than a one legged man in an a$$ kicking contest"

She's flakier than a snowstorm.

Balls said the queen, if I had two I'd be king.

He/ she could talk a dog off a meat wagon.

That's 4 times for this one...

I guess 5 now...

So hot I'd crawl though a mile of crushed glass just to listen to her fart through a walkie-talkie.

Marry a woman with small hands it will make your d**k seem larger!

That boy is about as useful as wet toilet paper.

As nervous as a Chilean miner . . .

Shaking like a blind queer at a weenie roast

About as useful as abandoning a baby in a dumpster

I'm off like a prom dress....

"This band will go over like a lead balloon" (And the rest is history)

"Not worth a hill of beans." That's what my mother told me every day when I was a kid. Glad I had enough self esteem to not listen.

This thread seems to have evolved from its intended theme to something more akin to: Metaphors, Homilies, & Bromides.

With that in mind; When in doubt, mumble

He doesn't know his a$$ from page 4

I was so confused I didn't know whether to $hit, reset my watch or steal third base

Lastly & maybe most importantly; When reason & all else fails, kick 'em in the nuts!

Cheers
JB

Talk about slapping a skunk - stirring up trouble for no reason.

Take a long walk off a short pier - get lost

Stronger than an ox

Sweeter than molasses

He has a hand full of gimmie and a mouthful of much obliged - never contributes

About as ornery as a mule

Who put the burr under your saddle?

You can buff your shoes, you can buff your car, but you can't buffalo - something that can't be done- from my grandpa