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Un-Registered User
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 902
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Two old men were sitting on a park bench. They look over and see a dog licking himself. One old guy says to the other, "Boy, I sure wish I could do that!"
The other replies, "You probably could, but you might want to pet him first"
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Don 1988 Targa |
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Edministrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: SF east bay
Posts: 24,825
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Did you hear about the fire at the circus? It was in tents.
You know, 10 out of 2 people are dyslexic...
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Good post? Leave a tip! O - $1 O - $2 O - $3 |
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RETIRED
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A priest, a Rabii and a Minister walk into a Bar,
Bartender says...."What is this, a joke?" |
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Registered
Join Date: Dec 2006
Posts: 6,522
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The phone rings at Miss Piggy's house.
Kermit answers and says... "She can't come to the phone she has a frog in her throat".
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O2 In Sully We Believe |
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Man asks his wife if she'd like to try a new position called "Wheelbarrow". Wife say's "Sure, but let's not go passed my parents house."
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'86 911 Coupe Corner bal track aligned '09 JCW Mini Cooper '94 Suzuki Carry 4x4 '07 BMW 530xi 6spd '11 Rancilio Silvia w/PID '79 280zx ported, rally cam(sold) '87 and '95 300Ds, (Sold) Wisdom begins w/ calling things by their real names; A is A. |
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Registered
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What's black and white a red all over?
a penguin in a blender. Yeah , is third grade but it is short.
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Rick 93 968 (My summer car), 05 Cayenne S (My winter car), 79 924 (Wife's summer car), 02 C230k (Wife's winter car), |
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RETIRED
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What's black and white and rolls on the beach?
A homeless person and a seagull fighting over a french fry..... |
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Puny Bird
Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: Port Hope (near Toronto) On, Canada
Posts: 4,566
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What's the fluid capacity of Monica Lewinsky's mouth?
One leader.
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'74 Porsche 914, 3.0/6 '72 Porsche 914, 1.7, wife's summer DD '67 Bug, 2600cc T4,'67 Bus, 2.0 T1 Not putting miles on your car is like not having sex with your girlfriend, so she'll be more desirable to her next boyfriend. |
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Registered
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The number zero walks up to the number eight and says "Nice belt"
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Paul B. '83 930 Euro '05 KLR650 '07 Honda Pilot '13 Mini Countryman |
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Canucks Fan
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Vancouver B.C. Canada
Posts: 2,216
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A guy comes out of the Liquor store with his purchase and cuts through an alley to get to his car, a bum lounging in the alley asks him what he has in the bag.
"I got some wine for my wife" the bum says "good trade"
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From the Deep Dark Jungle |
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Two condoms are walking down the street. They pass by a gay bar and one condom turns to the other and says "Hey, whatta ya say we go in and get $hitfaced!"
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--------------------------------------------------------------------------- "There is nothing to be learned from the second kick of a mule" - Mark Twain |
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White and Nerdy
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After twelve years of therapy my psychiatrist said something that brought tears to my eyes. He said, "No hablo ingles."
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Shadilay. |
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