Was given high end audio equipment as a gift... don't think I'll be able to keep it

[LeeH]

My neighbor who lived a couple of doors down passed away from melanoma a few months ago. He was a wonderful person, Swedish gentleman in his late 70s. I was always impressed by how vibrant he was - hiking, biking, always doing projects. We used to chat about various things, audio equipment, bicycles.

After he died, I ran into his family at outside the house. Talked to his daughter about the interests he and I had shared. He had told me repeatedly about his stereo equipment and how it was all boxed up. She offered to let me take a look. Some interesting stuff - Dual turntable, Akai reel to reel, Hales speakers and an amp and preamp whose names I'd never heard of. Told her I'd be happy to liquidate it for the estate when the time came.

Fast forward to yesterday... I'm heading out around noon and see they're having a garage sale. My heart sank. I was really hoping they didn't give away his stuff at garage sale prices! I didn't see any sign of it and had to ask. The daughter says she had been wanting to talk to me about his stereo equipment. She said she felt like he would have wanted someone to take it who would appreciate it. I was welcome to take any or all of it.

We went in and looked at everything. I told her the amp, preamp, and speakers were the only things I'd use, but I could sell everything else for her. She said that would be great. I went back this morning. She said she and her boyfriend had decided to keep the speakers, which was actually a relief for me as I already have some awesome floor speakers and wouldn't have room for them.

I brought most of it down to my house and started researching everything. I was caught of guard to find out that the pre-amp is a tube model (Audible Illusions Modulus 3a) which sells for $1200 or so on Ebay. The amp (Bryston 4B ST) sells for $1000-$1500 on EBay. I'm feeling really uncomfortable about how much this equipment is worth. A couple of hundred? Sure. A couple of thousand? Doesn't seem right. I'm sure I'll see her at the house over the next few days. I think they're getting it ready to sell. I have to admit when hooked up to my Athena speakers this set-up does sound incredible!

How would you handle if in my shoes?

[fanaudical]

Personally, I'd tell the daughter that you've powered-up/checked out the equipment and that it works. Then I'd give her a copy of the research you did to establish its worth. Tell her you're uncomfortable with receiving the equipment without full disclosure and offer to help liquidate if that is her preference.

[HardDrive]

Its a tough call.

I can understand the urge for honesty. But.....I'm not sure that the daughter is ignorant. Perhaps she is not interested in the matter of how much some audio gear is worth? Perhaps she is simply happy that the gear is gone, and to a person who obviously 'knows about these things'. If you treat the gear well, then you treat his memory well.

If the family's clearly in financial hardship, well then its a different issue.

[rnln]

I agree with what fanaudical thinks. I would disclose the price on ebay, maybe she (or you) will get a little less selling on ebay, but would give her a chance to see if she want to sell them or still want me to have them. Maybe she would let you have those and help her to sell the rest.
Just a very individual thought.

[GWN7]

Telling her the value is the standup thing to do. I'd be interested in the turntable if it's available?

[rwest]

My thought is that as long as you're going to keep it and use it, value doesn't matter since she felt that her father wanted it to go to someone who appreciated it. If you go back and tell her that it is worth a lot of money and does she want it back, you're putting her in a position to look look bad by asking for it back.

Write her a nice letter about the times you spent with her dad and how much you enjoy having his old gear. Then enjoy it without guilt.

Best,
Rutager

[on2wheels52]

What Rutager said.
If you were planning on selling it that's a different ballgame.
Jim

[VaSteve]

Originally Posted by HardDrive

Its a tough call.

I can understand the urge for honesty. But.....I'm not sure that the daughter is ignorant. Perhaps she is not interested in the matter of how much some audio gear is worth? Perhaps she is simply happy that the gear is gone, and to a person who obviously 'knows about these things'. If you treat the gear well, then you treat his memory well.

If the family's clearly in financial hardship, well then its a different issue.

X2

When someone dies and you have to get rid of all their stuff, sometimes the fact that stuff is "gone" is a huge releif.

[lm6y]

I would inform them of it's value, and let them know if they would like to reconsider, and sell it, that you're o.k. with that. But if they really wanted you to have it knowing the value, then keep it. Sometimes getting a "steal" isn't really a good thing if you aren't comfortable with it. If they still want you to have it, you can enjoy your favorite tunes, and think of him every time you do so. I can't think of a better way to be remembered.

[jyl]

I'd keep it. And go back for more.

J/K.

I'd just keep it. And use it. And have a drink for him when you do.

[gr8fl4porsche]

I would give her more credit. If she knew her father well, than she knows what his hobbies are all about. If she cared about value she would have taken the time to do her own research. I'm guessing she has plenty to deal with and just wants it gone. You were her best option. Enjoy it, it's yours.

[creaturecat]

Originally Posted by rwest

My thought is that as long as you're going to keep it and use it, value doesn't matter since she felt that her father wanted it to go to someone who appreciated it. If you go back and tell her that it is worth a lot of money and does she want it back, you're putting her in a position to look look bad by asking for it back.

Write her a nice letter about the times you spent with her dad and how much you enjoy having his old gear. Then enjoy it without guilt.

Best,
Rutager

this is good advice.

[matthew-s]

This is tough, and the answer depends somewhat on your relationship with the old man and his family, which I cannot possibly assess.

It sounds like he enjoyed his time with you, clearly enough that his family is aware.

Roughly, I'd say if you keep it for personal use, enjoy it like he would have, and don't worry about it.

If you sell it, then you should let them know. Another (arguably better) place to look for comps and sell the gear is Audiogon.

[techweenie]

So if I understand right, the thought was to have you enjoy it, not liquidate it.

Maybe you want to split the proceeds -- maybe give a chunk to cancer research in the family's name.

[vash]

she gave it to you..buy AC/DC's greatest hits..and make the old man proud!!

our you could sell and give the nice lady the check. your call..either way, the old guy would be happy she talked to you.

[Gogar]

If you can use it and appreciate it and will think fondly of the old guy when you do,

Then that's the definition of "Gift." Enjoy!

Even if you have mixed emotions about the monetary value, I'd suggest you don't worry about it. You and the other family have been sharing a lot of good will and inserting money and dollar amounts etc. into that equation will almost always make it seem 'cheaper.'

If, down the road, you sell the stuff, then revisit the idea.

[tharbert]

Originally Posted by LeeH

...She said she felt like he would have wanted someone to take it who would appreciate it. I was welcome to take any or all of it...

If they are clearing things out using a yard sale, they obviously aren't too wrapped up in getting the most money out of the belongings. While it may make you uncomfortable, I'd zip it about the worth of the things you'd like to keep. Graciously accept the gift. If they aren't worried about the monetary value of the gift, their decision is more about your connection with their dad. Discussing the gift's value takes away from the spirit of the gift. The idea about the note with some stories about your time with their dad would be appropriate.

It sounds like you still intend to liquidate the other components and return the money. That shows class.

[72doug2,2S]

Let me ease your conscience.

She wanted you to have it, so selling it will only create more problems for all those involved. The only solution, if you aren't going to use it, is to give it away to me for free. This is the only way you'll have no guilt about making ill-gotten gain.

[Gogar]

I agree with Doug, with the stipulation that you send me the Bryston and I'll appreciate it for you. I'll pay shipping!

[LeeH]

Thanks for all the input. Nice to be presented with the varied opinions. Definitely some points of view I hadn't considered.

Note to 14 year old self: Don't be too bummed when the "stereo" mom and dad get you for your birthday turns out to be a JC Penney boom box. It gets better.