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Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: San Jose
Posts: 4,622
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Good night mom
I knew this was coming. I thought I had already said my good byes. (in my mind)
My mom had Alzheimers. More and more apparent as the years passed. I visited her as often as I was able. There were times that she had no clue who I was until something I said sparked something back in her mind. One very strong word "Whoopie", her nick name that I gave her before I can remember, always brought her back. It always made her laugh. I love that she always worried about me and when I would get home safe. She used to wait up for me until I got home from work at the hot rod VW shop I used to work at. Her excuse would always be, " You are going to watch Benny Hill, Can I sit up and watch it with you?" Yeah mom. I grew up in a very Mennonite up bringing. I think my mom liked spending time with her son and actually enjoyed some raunchy British humor back in the day. She was an amazing mother to me! Always there. Always giving me encouragement. I got the call I have dreaded for so long Sunday 11/13/16 from my sisters. (I have FOUR older sisters) They said that I needed to come NOW! I hopped in the car and made the three hour drive to see my mother. I got there at 12:30 in the morning and my sisters were saying to hurry hurry. (no words to describe) I got to see my mom and hold her hand. I told her how much I loved her. I told her about how much she influenced my life by letting me be me. I told her about how much my wife enjoyed her time with her before we married. I told her about my daughter getting accepeted into Annapolis. Her eyes were engaged absorbing all. I thanked my mother for being such a good mom. One of my sisters did so also with the words, "Mother, you were waiting for all of your chickens to come home." Within seconds, mom drew her last breath and passed to the next life. I have a huge hole in my heart right now and will always miss her. I believe in God. I believe her mind was clear to hear all of this. While I was talking to her, her eyes were open and responsive to what I was telling her. I told her thank you for waiting for me...and I loved her and it was okay to go. My sisters and I were holding her as she took her last breath. Very sobering! Yet I feel extremely privileged to share her last moments. Rest in peace mom. Dad has been waiting for you. Dad passed back in 2010. 
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Dan 2002 996 C4 Cab w/ Jake Raby 4.0 2024 Tacoma TRD Offroad 4x4 2003 Range Rover HSE |
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11-16-2016, 08:48 PM
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Vafri
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Worldwide
Posts: 2,144
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You are a Son and a Brother who understands love, spirituality, humanity. I know they are proud of you. Your post shows all of this.
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11-16-2016, 10:37 PM
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Registered
Join Date: Apr 2001
Location: Linn County, Oregon
Posts: 48,537
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Dan, welcome to the club none of us wanted to join. Those who have lost both parents. It's fortunate you were able to be there. Take comfort in that...
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"Now, to put a water-cooled engine in the rear and to have a radiator in the front, that's not very intelligent." -Ferry Porsche (PANO, Oct. '73) (I, Paul D. have loved this quote since 1973. It will remain as long as I post here.) |
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11-16-2016, 10:48 PM
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Registered
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 7,917
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My condolences. You're mum sounded very like my own. I am always envious of people who get to grow older with their parents. I lost my mum in my early teens and my dad in my early 20's. I'm 49 now and still miss them dearly.
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In Heaven… the mechanics are German, the chefs are French, the police are British, the lovers are Italian and everything is organized by the Swiss. In Hell…the mechanics are French, the police are German, the chefs are British, the lovers are Swiss and everything is organized by the Italians. |
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11-16-2016, 10:51 PM
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Run smooth, run fast
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: South Carolina
Posts: 13,447
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Thanks for sharing all that with us, Dan... she was obviously a gem.
Moms are really special... we learn so much from them... while they're with us as well as after they're gone. You'll see what I mean.
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- John "We had a band powerful enough to turn goat piss into gasoline." |
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11-16-2016, 10:56 PM
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Registered
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Charlottesville Va
Posts: 5,796
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Peace, brother. It's a journey we'll almost all go down, and not an easy one. You'll cherish the memories, and her guidance will never end.
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Greg Lepore 85 Targa 05 Ducati 749s (wrecked, stupidly) 2000 K1200rs (gone, due to above) 05 ST3s (unfinished business) |
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11-17-2016, 02:23 AM
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"O"man(are we in trouble)
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: On the edge
Posts: 16,452
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RIP Mom.
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11-17-2016, 02:29 AM
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Registered
Join Date: Sep 2001
Location: Dismal Nitch, AZ
Posts: 9,042
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Quote:
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Don . "Fully integrated people, in their transparency, tend to not be subject to mechanisms of defense, disguise, deceit, and fraudulence." - - Don R. 1994, an excerpt from My Ass From a Hole in the Ground - A Comparative View |
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11-17-2016, 02:44 AM
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Registered
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: Michigan
Posts: 14,093
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So sorry for your loss.
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1981 911SC ROW SOLD - JULY 2015 Pacific Blue Wayne |
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11-17-2016, 03:00 AM
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Join Date: Apr 2002
Posts: 30,497
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My condolences Dan...
That was a beautiful post....your parents did a fantastic job and it shows. Be well.... |
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11-17-2016, 03:12 AM
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Registered
Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: Maryland
Posts: 31,507
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She gave you a gift she knew you would appreciate...the end of her journey shared with those she loved.
Beautiful.
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1996 FJ80. |
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11-17-2016, 03:18 AM
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UnRegistered User
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Very sorry to hear of the passing of your mom.
Alzheimer's is a cruel illness, robbing people of their own past. How great it was for you to be able to be able to use some key words to reestablish contact with her during her later years. My dad is 88 and is suffering from Alzheimer's like symptoms and I do the same thing with him using the old standard jokes and one liners my dad had use for years and years. Your post brought a tears to my eyes. Thanks for sharing your experience.
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Bill K. "I started out with nothin and I still got most of it left...." 83 911 SC Guards Red (now gone) And I sold a bunch of parts I hadn't installed yet. |
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11-17-2016, 03:23 AM
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Did you get the memo?
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Wichita, KS
Posts: 32,538
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Dan, very sorry for your loss. I went through Alzheimer's and dementia with my grandmother, in the end I felt that death was a gift because her suffering was over. Take solace in the fact that she is now with God and your father. Your focus on the positive memories will help get you through the rough times. Peace to you and your family.
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‘07 Mazda RX8-8 Past: 911T, 911SC, Carrera, 951s, 955, 996s, 987s, 986s, 997s, BMW 5x, C36, C63, XJR, S8, Maserati Coupe, GT500, etc |
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11-17-2016, 03:48 AM
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Bland
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Sorry to hear about your loss. Moms are hard to lose for all of us.
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06 Cayenne Turbo S and 11 Cayenne S 77 911S Wide Body GT2 WCMA race car 86 930 Slantnose - featured in Mar-Apr 2016 Classic Porsche Sold: 76 930, 90 C4 Targa, 87 944, 06 Cayenne Turbo, 73 911 ChumpCar endurance racer - featured in May-June & July-Aug 2016 Classic Porsche |
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11-17-2016, 03:49 AM
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Registered
Join Date: May 2005
Location: Houston
Posts: 5,471
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Touching and sad but the circle of life...my deepest condolences.
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Ole Skool - wouldn't have it any other way |
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11-17-2016, 03:55 AM
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Back in the saddle again
Join Date: Oct 2001
Location: Central TX west of Houston
Posts: 56,135
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My condolences.
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Steve '08 Boxster RS60 Spyder #0099/1960 - never named a car before, but this is Charlotte. '88 targa  SOLD 2004 - gone but not forgotten
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11-17-2016, 04:09 AM
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Double Trouble
Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: North of Pittsburgh
Posts: 11,705
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So sorry buddy. It's hard to lose them both. I wish heaven had a phone so I could call them..
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I used to be addicted to the hokey pokey..........but I turned myself around.. 75 914 1.8 2010 Cayenne base |
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11-17-2016, 04:12 AM
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Thanks for sharing, Dan. My condolences to you and your sisters.
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Mat P 1988 911 Carrera |
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11-17-2016, 04:25 AM
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You sound like a great son to your mother. You did everything right.
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11-17-2016, 04:47 AM
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Dan, Sorry to hear of your mothers passing. That was a very heartfelt post, now I need a tissue.
R.I.P Mom
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A nose heavy airplane flies poorly, a tail heavy plane flies once. |
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11-17-2016, 04:59 AM
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1983 Porsche SC
Crop Duster
Kachow
1976 Porsche 930
Lexus RX350
1979 Porsche 911SC
