What would you do?

[Gretch]

Originally Posted by legion

She should slap him and yell loudly every time he does something. Nothing is going to happen until she makes it uncomfortable for both the predator and HR.

/\ /\ This... and put a LOT of stink into it...........

I (husband) would have wanted to attend a company outing early on and had a private word with the guy.........

[Evans, Marv]

You wife should have been (& hopefully has been) documenting every aspect of the situation in real time. That includes each episode involving the perp. and her interactions with HR. This is just common sense. In any environment where ongoing and required interaction with other people and where negative behavior creates hostile interrelations, documentation should be (is) the first line of action. If she hasn't done this, she should sit down and document as best she can what has transpired being up front about it being a history after the fact, then begin documenting the situation in real time. Then I would consult with an attorney before taking it to higher ups and let them know I had done that as a result of lack of effectiveness at the lowest levels of reporting it.

[scottmandue]

At my work HR does the same... talks a big story but very little action.

Telling management you are talking to a lawyer (even if you are not) usually makes things happen.

[Seahawk]

I am not a litigious person there is a point where some companies do not act until the weight of a lawsuit is brought to bear.

I would do what everyone here has said: Document all past occurrences from the Chaplin and all meetings with HR concerning the Chaplin's actions and their response.

Then, camera and recorder up and if verbal, recorded warnings don't stop this putz, issue the recommended slap and an additional very loud warning.

Take evidence as far up the food chains in and outside of the company as necessary.

Everyone has the right to a safe work space, free from d-bags.

My program office had over 400 people supporting my programs. When I got command I met with each team and outlined my sexual harassment and racial policies in writing.

I them met with each new employee in person that came to work for me over the next five years and made sure they understood my command climate...both ways, by the way. Women can be predators as well, especially in military and governmental settings were they can wield tremendous influence over careers...with people that do not have the ability to quit and get work in the "other" Navy.

I never had an issue because they all knew I was serious. Bullying is at the heart of sexual harassment - I hate f'ing bullies, every last one of them.

I never had a complaint because bullies are cowards and they knew the house would fall in on them.

[fastfredracing]

Originally Posted by Gretch

/\ /\ This... and put a LOT of stink into it...........

I (husband) would have wanted to attend a company outing early on and had a private word with the guy.........

This is what I was thinking. It would be hard to not make contact and have a heart to heart.
"I am asking you man to man, to never touch my wife again, and please keep your future contact with her, clean . Our next step will be legal action, or.....

[JeremyD]

70 year old guy - I'd fix the problem if it was my wife. Tough to come back from a knee injury when you are 70 years old.

I'd recommend he retire - if not I might retire him

[steveo12345]

Thanks for all the replies! She has things fairly well documented. I told her I would pay him a visit and take care of it my way but she said no. They only have one company event a year that spouses can attend and I do not want to wait for that. We don't want to have to resort to legal action. She just wants it to stop and and that may require involving a lawyer.

[recycled sixtie]

As one of the above says she should take up ju jitzu or some marshal arts. My daughter and her coworkers got mental abuse from a more senior male worker. My daughter went to the big boss and told him. He was given a warning and he seems better since.

However your wife decking the minister may end up with her being charged with abuse herself.

Talking to his boss would help and be the safe route. Do it now.

[jamesnmlaw]

Nothing better than a man-to-man. A little micro-camera with sound at the meet. Have your wife wear the camera thereafter. Have your wife complain in writing to HR. File a police report after the next incident (if recorded). Take out restraining order. Prepare to lose job. Sue the company. Document. Document. Document.

[Tobra]

Originally Posted by wdfifteen

Visit the perp at home, show him the list you posted above. Tell him this crap has to stop immediately.

This is perhaps the worst advice ever given on this site.

DO NOT confront the old geezer, there are far too many downsides.

Document and get an attorney. Have attorney write letter to the appropriate parties. You have already done all you can short of this. Depending on where this is happening, the state may have someone you can speak to about it.

[steveo12345]

Originally Posted by Tobra

Document and get an attorney. Have attorney write letter to the appropriate parties. You have already done all you can short of this. Depending on where this is happening, the state may have someone you can speak to about it.

Thanks again everyone for all the great advice. I really think this is the way to go. I'm going to run it by the wife and see if I can get her to agree. **** has got to stop now. I hate that she has had to put up with it for so long and feel frustrated that I can't step in and do something.

[Baz]

An anonymous letter sent to the perp informing him of his distasteful behaviour might also do the trick. Of course, leave specifics out regarding OP's wife.

Just a generalized warning that he better clean up his act or else.

Keep a copy.

[rfuerst911sc]

Nothing say's " no " like a swift kick to the nuts She's told him no many times , she's had to push him away the guy is not getting the message...........give him the message LOUDER ! Geez a religious perv......... so unheard of

[1990C4S]

Vest cam and a shirt that says "I live in a one party consent state"

[stealthn]

Let’s be clear, HR is about protectng the company NOT it’s employees. If they have done nothing, file a police report so you have something documented, let them come in and talk to HR.

[Por_sha911]

HR is all about protecting the company. 100%
If the company is at risk of a lawsuit because they didn't protect an employee from harassment then HR will wake up quickly. You just have to call their bluff and start making legal prep moves.

[flatbutt]

Paper trail. She must document her efforts at giving the company a chance to stop the harassment. Then she has the power.

[Por_sha911]

Originally Posted by flatbutt

Paper trail. She must document her efforts at giving the company a chance to stop the harassment. Then she has the power.

looks like they did that

Originally Posted by steveo12345

Thanks for all the replies! She has things fairly well documented. I told her I would pay him a visit and take care of it my way but she said no. They only have one company event a year that spouses can attend and I do not want to wait for that. We don't want to have to resort to legal action. She just wants it to stop and and that may require involving a lawyer.