admit to your stupidity

[Wayne 962]

I've got a few. Well, our motto here at Pelican is "we'll make the mistakes so that you don't have to..."

Two that stick out in my mind are:

- Cutting the gas line under my 914 thinking that the ViceGrip I had placed on the line was more than effective at clamping it. I dumped about a 1/2 gallon of gas on my arm and shoulder trying to reclamp it and prevent 12 gallons of gas (full tank of course) from dumping out and down my driveway...

- Filling the 914 transmission (901) all the way up to the top of the housing because it said in the Haynes manual "fill the transmission until the fluid flows out." Well, I mistook the breather valve on the *top* of the transmisison for the fill plug. I added six quarts to the transmission, filling the entire unit up to the top. Needless to say, there was a bit of friction there, and a smoke screen behind my car so thick I couldn't see the car behind me...



-Wayne

[lateapex911]

Originally posted by Wayne at Pelican Parts
I've got a few. Well, our motto here at Pelican is "we'll make the mistakes so that you don't have to..."

Two that stick out in my mind are:

- Cutting the gas line under my 914 thinking that the ViceGrip I had placed on the line was more than effective at clamping it. I dumped about a 1/2 gallon of gas on my arm and shoulder trying to reclamp it and prevent 12 gallons of gas (full tank of course) from dumping out and down my driveway...

...



-Wayne

Oh, Wayne, nice try, but I'm afraid that is small fry compared to my "gas exploits"! Only half a gallon and only down your arm?? You're going to have to screw up a lot worse to win this contest!!!

[Icemaster]

Young kid, first car, '77 olds Cutlass with a 350 and Rochester Quad 77,000 miles on a strong, solid, but dirty engine. Kid decides to de-grease engine. Buys three cans of engine degreaser, warms car by cruising 20 miles on the expressway then pulls into the car wash. Hoses enging with the cleaner. Then pulls out the pressure wand and douses it completely with very cold water (this being February and all...) resulting in an enormous cloud of steam, several loud cracking and ticking noises from engine compartment (all masked by the noise of high pressure water...) and noxious fumes. Funny thing is, car now won't start as no electrical components were covered with baggies or other forms of protection. Car gets towed to garage where mechanic lets it sit on the lot for two days, calls and says "you want the good news or the bad news? Good news, no adverse affects on the electrical system from your little car wash incident. Bad news - seems there's this crack along cylinder #6 on your block..."

First lesson in thermodynamics.

[onewhippedpuppy]

Not a Porsche adventure because I don't yet have one, but one cold day in Kansas, I took my 240SX to my parent's garage to work on it (poor college kid, no garage). With my dad's kerosene torpedo heater spitting more fuel than burning, and his other heater nearly flat after leaping into my way when I tried to drive the car through the back of the garage (another story), my massive intellect deduced that three electric space heaters, plugged into the same 16 gauge cord of course, could surely produce the same amount of heat. Not yet understanding issues of amperage, and heat produced by plugging three heaters into one little extention cord, I left the heaters to warm my workspace, and went to grab lunch. I returned to find that I had unknowingly parked my car in a large bong. To summarize: little cord gets hot, little cord bursts into flames, God blows out flames before burning down garage. As a side note, does anyone know how much of a ***** it is to buff off the residue left behind by smoke? Matt

Mine was an expensive dip***** move... About 8-9 years ago I had a '73 911T. I heard noises from the timing chain area, so I removed the covers and found mechanical!!! chain tensioners. So I bought new tensioners and installed them. I noticed that the timing marks didn't line up exactly on both sides and said to myself, "Oh, I'm sure they don't need to be perfectly lined up..." $2000 later, I knew that they did indeed need to be lined up exactly...

-CKrause

[john70t]

In high school I took a trip with gal from Detroit to Toronto and decided to change the oil before returning (big "what was I thinking" here). Mistook trans plug for the oil pan, but the 84 Tercel made it back(minus 5th gear) with 8 quarts in the engine and none in the trans. I should have used Duralube, then I wouldn't have had to buy oil again
I also saw a friend flush his warmed up Rabbit cooling system with a hose and cracked the head, another found a major short in a VW bus by sticking the battery terminal on until the wire burned itself out(that turned out to be the whole dash).

[Paul Franssen]

Gosh, you guys are stupid!
Back in 1976, lovely summer, I had bought a used BMW 600 flat-twin aircooled motorcycle and decided to ride it up to Scotland. Sometimes I would camp, and sometimes I'd stay at bed and breakfast places. At one such B&B, I decided to get up early, had a lovely breakfast and then a morning-smoke of that famous herb, and here I am, 8:30 a.m., fully weatherclad, full-face helmeted et.al. when I last second realize I'd forgotten to check the oil (Ze book said to always check the oil level before embarking on a long ride!). So I initiate the oil-checking procedures (whilst the other guests, by now having their ham and eggs in the veranda, look on - at least, that's what I imagine-at this astronaut-like nincompoop's complex activities, mmm.. add a little oil of course, and then...yep... fully ready to go -I always liked to use the kick-starter-, get a good grip onto the gas-handle, kick hard, we have ignition WHAM whoosh roar...and everything goes black before me eyes!
I'd forgotten to put the dipstick back into i's filler-orifice and to re-screw the cap; the engine oil spewed up into the air and fully covered my perspex shield, me coveralls, as well as part of the immaculately maintained driveway, with first quality oil, the breakfasters observing the scene with, what seemed to me to be, considerable interest. Took me another half hour more or less cleaning it all up. My face was a redder shade of pink, I think.

[brawlins]

In the late 80's - Pulled my car into a full parking lot and forgot to enable the brake or put the car in gear. Came out an hour later and my car had rolled backward about twenty feet and stopped before it hit any other cars. God had mercy on my stupidity!

[JavaBrewer]

At 18 I had two vehicles, a 77 Datsun truck and a 78 VW Scirocco. Having two cars at this age means I don't have a lot of money for other things, like gas.

Rainy Saturday morning I jump into my Datsun to meet a friend for breakfast. Halfway there, ~2 miles, I run out of gas. I jog back home and pickup my VW, remember that a spare gas can is in the truck I drive back to stranded Datsun to retrieve. Trying to open the gas cap find it's kinda rusted on so I retrieve some small pliers from my toolbox and rip and tear at the rusty cap to open. Once it begins to move resort to unscrewing with my fingers and proceed to rip my finger open. Realizing I'll need some serious bandages to stop the blood flow I drive the VW home where along the way I run out of gas. Never made breakfast that morning.

How about trying to impress the girls in High School by entering the student parking lot way too fast, sliding out and crashing your babe magnet orange Datsun truck into a light pole. Yes I got their attention all right

Another morning adventure, this time a Sunday. I load up my Kawasaki KDX175 and head to Carpinteria for some riding on the beach and bluffs. Having too much fun on the beach and realize I'm late for, yep breakfast, with the new girlfriend. Motoring back I fail to see a tidepool. I remember thinking "Man that big rock looks like its underwater" as I hit the pool at 30MPH. I wake up from my brief nap laying on the far side of the pool, stand, and see my green bike in the pool center submerged in 3 feet of sea water. I get the bike out, try to kick start, yeah right. I push the bike ~ 1 mile, then up the steep hill to the parking lot. I rush home and being completely whooped on this girl and don't want to miss "breakfast", put the bike into the garage without draining the salty sea. It continued to sit like that for a good 2 weeks cause I'm just too "busy" with other priorities. Complete tear down and new top end before that bike runs on its own again. Idiot teenager!

[D7N7MASTER]

Here's another royal screw up;
I had just finished installing new carpet in our 914 and was putting the interior back together when I got a "wild hair" and decided to move the fireX to to better location... Prior to installing the carpet kit I had installed the fire extinguisher on the center tunnel. Anyway, while installing the carpet I noticed a "perfect" spot to mount the FireX right on the firewall underneath the glove box. So I grabbed the FireX bracket and my handy cordless drill. Within a few minutes I had poked a few holes & reached for a screw. As I started the first screw I noticed that my hand was wet - UhhhOhhh - FUEL!!! DOOOOHHHH!!! I had drilled thru the fuel tank. Now fuel is running out of the tank onto my garage carpeting & headed for the driveway. Quickly I removed the fuel line from the fuel pump and filled every gas can I had. Then I pulled the gas tank & found that only one of the three holes I had drilled went thru the tank. I ALMOST got lucky! Had the gas tank repaired, painted and re-installed. Moral of story: Look behind where you are about to drill or prepare for entry into the Darwin Awards.

[quaz]

OK since we have brought up drilling without looking stories I have one. In 96 I bought a new Civic EX. Well this was before the SI came out so the car didn't have any performance stuff on it. Since I was into AutoX at the time I figured a cheap upgrade would be a rear sway bar. So I got one off an Acura in the junk yard and proceded to mark the holes to be drilled to mount it on the 2 month old Civic. I drilled the first hole and hear this poping and hissing noise. Now my heart has just started puming 100mph because I probably his the gas tank. So I yell to my friend across the shop to grab a bucket. Then I begin to back the drill out, but there is no gas. ?????? Pop the trunk and look in there, nothing. Then as I am stairing in the trunk it dawns on me. I just put a 1/2" hole in my spare tire. Man I was never to relieved to drill a hole in a tire before in my life. So, since the car was leased I drove it for 22 more months and turned it in with a flat spare. I hope no one needed that thing!

[BennyBroadcast]

Drilled throught the tire, he he!!

[Jeremy Cottrell]

First screw up when I was about 14, and totally addicted to cars, but could not drive yet. My only salvation was to take up the roll of family mechanic, although my older brother had been doing a much better job for many years. I decided Mom's '67 Bug needed a tune up. I put in new plugs, points, cap and rotor, fired it up and it ran great............ for about an hour........... Mom came limping home with a very loud 3 cylinder VW. How odd, one of the spark plugs was laying in the engine sheetmetal with the plug wire still attached. Strange, I knew I put all the plugs in, that one in particular stuck in my memory 'cause it was SOOO TIGHT!!! After my brother put an insert in the head, the car ran great for many more years......

[lally911]

While changing brake fluid with a power bleeder I didn't clamp the overflow hose tight enough. A whole can of ATE Blue went right out the overflow hose.

My first oil change the dipstick went in the resevoir

I'll have more to report by spring :-)

Keith

[Hugh R]

Installing a voltage inverter in my positive ground Aston Martin DB4 under the dash, drilled a couple of holes for mounting the inverter on the fire wall. Started the car and antifreeze came pouring out of the heater vents (drilled through the heater obviously). Put some Permatex gasket sealer and ran the screws back in. Stopped leaking, been that way for 30 years. Eventually, I reversed the polarity of the car which is easy with a car that has a generator.

[svandamme]

i did a new one last week,

replaced rotor, new magnecor wires, and also decided to clean up some of those ground wires that were cluttered around my distribution cap...
one of those was like a coiled up wire, you know flexible wire.. they all attached to the bolts that hold the Bosh coil in place

went for drive, car performed like a racehorse on valium....

opened the engine lid, and that flexible one had gotten disconnected, and was hitting my fan blades.. what do they say bout grounds again???

[kpmurray]

I was rebuilding the brake system on my '54 356 and encountered a stuck piston in one of the wheel cylinders. No problem, I grabbed a piece of junk brake line, brazed it shut and screwed it on, tightened down the bleed valve, placed the whole thing in a vise and relit my torch...My wife had just poked her head into the garage as my 150 cal wheel cylinder "gun" went off! bang - and the piston is sticking partway out of the drywall about a foot in front of my wife.

She leaves me alone now when I work on my P-cars.

[lvle1416]

1-A couple of years ago I coverted my xk-120 jaguar from solid wheels to wire wheels. I put the wire wheel spline mounts on the wrong sides and one front wheel came off at about 40 mph. Luckily the frame was so strong that he kept the front up. Went and found the wheel in a field and put it back on.

2-bought a xjs jaguar with a corvette motor. Motor and trans were great but something else went wrong every week.


good news--no more jags-few problems with my 84 carrera. I got a PPI and well worth it for peace of mind.

[kstar]

Admit to my stupidity?

OK.

Two words: "Motor Meister".

BR,

Kurt

[Emission]

For my second oil change on my first car ('84 Rabbit) I didn't have a new crush washer for the oil drain plug. I put the used one back on - and it leaked (of course).

I decided to buy a new one and put it on. In my brilliance, I decided I could unscrew the drain plug, remove it, swap the washer, and re-insert it back into the oil pan - and only lose a few drops of that fresh oil....

So, parked on a hill (you know, you put two wheels on the curb so you can climb under your car without jacking it up) and I unscrewed the drain plug. I use my right thumb to hold the (burning hot) oil in, as I try to use my left to one-handedly pull the old washer and replace it. Too bad I dropped the plug - and it rolls down the street...

So, there I am, under the car with my thumb stuck in the drain hole (burning on the hot oil). I wait a few minutes for someone to wander by... Nobody does. I decide to "quickly" make a dash for the drain plug. Of course, all four quarts drain onto the sidewalk in the minute it takes for me to scoot from the car, recover the plug, and get it all back together. Cleaning it up was a *****.