The Dreaded Friend Zone - Page 5

KaptKaos · 12-27-2011, 05:27 PM

Ever consider the fact that you're being played?

boba · 12-27-2011, 06:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tweezers74

Simply put, the last girl was the one. Cheated on him, got married to the other guy. Burned.

Damn kids. You answered the question yourself tweeze, he needs time and distance from this experience. He likes you or he would not be spending the time with you. You need to date and see other people AND keep up the friendship. If he can work through the fear of betrayal and come out the other side there may be something between you two, if not you will have a long term friend and that ain't a bad thing. If you meet 'the one' in the meantime still good.

genrex · 12-27-2011, 06:09 PM

Or the next time you're sitting next to him, just place your hand on his frontal protuberance... and leave it there a moment, and smile, and see if there's a hot fire burning down below.

Next thing you know, you might be saying, "I do."

turn9 · 12-27-2011, 06:31 PM

Can't believe that after 80some posts the light hasn't shined through!!!

The guy doesn't want to be used AGAIN!!!

Do you want him for ever ( not according to your posts) or just as a bedpost notch??

He's been there, done that!! Search your heart and if you don't love him, accept his frienship and don't hurt him again.

flatbutt · 12-27-2011, 06:49 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tweezers74

YES! I need to get myself on Armando (my snowboard) and work on my toe edge and forget this silly boy!!!

Just be careful with that toe edge. I've done a bunch of face plants!!

Did I mention that I'm single?

Danimal16 · 12-27-2011, 07:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tweezers74

Simply put, the last girl was the one. Cheated on him, got married to the other guy. Burned.

IMHO this is a big deal, she didn't respect him. Alot of good insight on this thread. It is very complicated, don't think he is playing a game on you.

He may just not be ready for the next step. I would offer for discussion, that even if he is dating other women, he may value you your presence more. The comment about intimidation is valid; again in my opinion.

If I can be so brazen; is he worth waiting out? Is he great as a friend? Could you accept either? Like I say, no easy answers. (But it is kinda romantic)

speeder · speeder's Garage

If I run across any women in need of self-esteem, I'm sending them here. You guys are really obsequies.

john70t · 12-27-2011, 07:15 PM

Oh the possibilities:
-He's wants to better understand his feminine side.
-He's true shy, sensitive, and tenative to letting his feelings be hurt again by a woman.
-He needs to be "caught" and you're not trying hard enough.
-He's a raging anti-feminist deep inside and practicing holding back from strangling you.
-You share the same social groups and he has "secrets" to be kept(limpy dinky winky/bottom in S&M/crossdessing/other).
-He just doesn't need additional complications or projects right now. Period.
-He really likes your friend better, and he's already gotten you lined up as plan B.
-You inspire him emotionally as a buddy, but not emotionally -->physically.

You sound agressive, he sounds passive.
Could be anything.
-

Danimal16 · 12-27-2011, 07:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by boba

Damn kids. You answered the question yourself tweeze, he needs time and distance from this experience. He likes you or he would not be spending the time with you. You need to date and see other people AND keep up the friendship. If he can work through the fear of betrayal and come out the other side there may be something between you two, if not you will have a long term friend and that ain't a bad thing. If you meet 'the one' in the meantime still good.

Spot on!!!!!!

If he is worth waiting for, consider waiting. Keep in mind life is short.

If not, move on!

But if he is worth having as a friend, that is pretty good. Friends are hard to come by.

nostatic · nostatic's Garage

Quote:

Originally Posted by speeder

You guys are really obsequies.

It's better than being obsidian...

1990C4S · 12-27-2011, 07:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by XXXXXXX

You guys are really obsequies.

We are so obsequious we won't even spell it correctly.

nostatic · nostatic's Garage

speel

SPEEL

get it write!

genrex · 12-27-2011, 07:31 PM

Go for it. Both of you want it. Enough with the words. Do you want to make memories that you'll smile and laugh about together when you're 80 years old? Or do you want to be tentative and many years from now cry about an opportunity lost? It's your life. Do you want him? Then be direct about it. Enough with the nice-nice asexual behavior. Kiss him - hard. Make memories!

speeder · speeder's Garage

Quote:

Originally Posted by 1990C4S

We are so obsequious we won't even spell it correctly.

I'm blaming this one on the new iphone. It has a mind of its own when it comes to spelling. (Not to mention completely different words/meanings).

WolfeMacleod · 12-27-2011, 11:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by widebody911

Take your clothes off. If he won't hit it, he's gay.

This.
Plus about.. a million.

Jim Bremner · 12-27-2011, 11:47 PM

He's cought the GHEY! Show up nekkid.

Schumi · 12-27-2011, 11:53 PM

All of a sudden my relationship threads are no longer nearly as interesting.

speeder · speeder's Garage

I'm straight and I've turned down some action that would apparently make you guys think I'm gay. Not much, mind you, but sometimes it just isn't worth it or it's just wrong for one of several legitimate reasons.

Our Miss Tweezers is an attractive woman with plenty of self confidence but chemistry is either there or it's not. I could tell you guys stories of straight guys passing on dating opportunities with beautiful women that you obviously would never believe. Not everyone has the same opportunities in this world.

One of my best friends is one of those guys who "does whatever he wants", as the old saying goes. He had Elle McPherson when she was fresh off the boat in the early '80s and he was in college at Brown. He dumped her for someone else that you guys would think was a downgrade but he was in love with her. Elle was beautiful but boring, he said. Not implying that tweezers is boring, (what's up with that name?), just that attraction and romantic interest is not as simple as some are making it. I realize that this is the Internet and there is plenty of joking but I don't think it's helping the young lady in this case.

What I get from your posts, Tweezers, is that you have a good head on your shoulders and that is so much more valuable than physical gifts alone. If you don't mind my asking, what sort of work do you do? How did you find this place? Car enthusiast? Enquiring minds and all that...

sc_rufctr · 12-28-2011, 12:27 AM

Men can be friends with women... But often either the man or woman is hoping the friendship will blossom into something more.

I've got lots (4 right now) of female friends who I go out with but often one will drop away with no explanation or more commonly because she met someone.
Seems even a friendship can be challenging to a new partner.

DanielDudley · 12-28-2011, 02:21 AM

Men are idiots, but they NEED to be the one who decides. Don't push, and stop being so available. Play hard to get, and see what happens.

You have a biological clock that is ticking. He doesn't. If he figures it out too late, Oh Well...

There have always been certain people in my life that I have been interested in to a level that if they weren't interested in me, I was not going to hang out.

Be honest with yourself, and be willing to move on if you can't be casual. There are only Billions of other men out there...