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John Rogers's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 1969
Location: chula vista ca usa
Posts: 5,141
Some of mine....now that I have gotten to the point to be considered an old fart!

- Any fool can go fast in a straight line but it takes a well coordinated fool to fast around corners.

- Once a Marine, always a Marine, even in line at Walmart.

- California's DMV is about as useless as tits on a tom cat.

- When in the Navy: If you buy new under shorts, buy some of those iron-on hash marks so no one will steal them.
Old 09-12-2018, 06:35 AM
  Pelican Parts Catalog | Tech Articles | Promos & Specials    Reply With Quote #21 (permalink)
"O"man(are we in trouble)
 
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Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: On the edge
Posts: 15,575
Slipperier than cat shlt on linoleum!
Old 09-12-2018, 06:41 AM
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Counterclockwise?
 
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: Keswick, Ontario
Posts: 1,878
Garage
If you're not handsome, you'd better be handy.
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Rod
1986 Carrera
2001 996TT
A bunch of stuff with spark plugs
Old 09-12-2018, 06:49 AM
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Actual Porsche owner
 
wdfifteen's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SW Ohio
Posts: 19,346
Garage
"Slicker that slug guts on a brass doorknob."
"Independent as a hog on ice."
"Cold as a witch's tit."
"Cold enough to freeze the ball off a brass monkey."
"Poor planning and lack of foresight does not constitute an emergency."
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Old 09-12-2018, 06:53 AM
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Posts: 48,046
In my yoot I worked around cranes quite a bit. One guy I worked with had a habit of saying "raise it down" or "lower it up".

I thought it was funny at the time, but we had to put a stop to it because of the obvious safety implications.

BTW don't try it, turns into a bad habit real easy.
Kinda like getting a song stuck in your head you can't get rid of.

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nike sux.
Old 09-12-2018, 07:11 AM
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Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: Clinton, NJ
Posts: 8,761
"If you're looking for sympathy, you'll find it in the dictionary between schidt and syphilis."
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Dave

1969 911T Coupe
1972 911E Targa
Old 09-12-2018, 07:49 AM
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Craig T's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Ventura County, CA
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If you're gonna be a bear...You might as well be a grizzly.
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Craig T

Volvo V60 - Daily Driver (I love it!)
997 Turbo - FVD Exhaust, GIAC Tune - 542 dyno hp on 93 oct
1972 Chevy K-10 Pick-Up Truck Hugger Orange
Old 09-12-2018, 08:25 AM
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Join Date: Jun 2008
Posts: 3,225
another tired old joke

Had a friend in school who couldn't wait for a new rookie teacher to mention
Pi R2 (Pi r square). He would jump in with "Pie are not square, pie are round, cake are square"
Old 09-12-2018, 10:13 AM
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Location: Castaic, Calif.
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It's easier to put on slippers than it is to try and carpet the whole world.
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"When everything seems to be going against you, remember that the airplane takes off against the wind, not with it."
~ Henry Ford
Old 09-12-2018, 10:22 AM
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Driver, not Mechanic
 
Join Date: May 2013
Location: SF Bay Area
Posts: 1,761
Quote:
Originally Posted by dafischer View Post
"If you're looking for sympathy, you'll find it in the dictionary between schidt and syphilis."
- Major Payne
Old 09-12-2018, 10:57 AM
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Join Date: Apr 2001
Location: Linn County, Oregon
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"Youíve got to be very careful if you donít know where you are going, because you might not get there." -Yogi Berra

"I'd have won that tournament if all those better players hadn't shown up." -My "honorary nephew" Matt, a BCA grand master, after entering a Chinook Winds casino Open. Paid $20,000 for first, so a batch of top pros showed. Hell, he placed 5-6. Won $2,600. Not bad for a weekends work.
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"Now, to put a water-cooled engine in the rear and to have a radiator in the front, that's not very intelligent."
-Ferry Porsche (PANO, Oct. '73) (I, Paul D. have loved this quote since 1973. It will remain as long as I post here.)
Old 09-12-2018, 10:57 AM
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Ubi bene ibi patria
 
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Sticks like snot to a hot oven door.
"If I knew I was going to live this long, I'd have taken better care of myself" (Thanks to Mickey Mantle)

Cheers
JB
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Nothing can be more absurd than the practice that prevails in our country of men and women not following the same pursuits with all their strengths and with one mind, for thus, the state instead of being whole is reduced to half. -- Plato
Old 09-12-2018, 11:41 AM
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Location: SW Cheese Country
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Friend from HS. "It don't make me no nevermind".

Others:

"Like a monkey playin' a banjo"

"You can lead them to water but all they do is drown"

"Wrong sized glass" when referring to glass half empty/full.
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Brent
The X15 was the only aircraft I flew where I was glad the engine quit. - Milt Thompson.
Old 09-12-2018, 11:50 AM
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My Dad to me almost always when leaving the house. “Be good, if you can’t be good at least be careful.”
This took on a new meaning when I started dating.
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2004 996 Turbo CAB X50
2003 996 cab 6 speed Sold
1972 RS 3.2 twin plug short stroke crank fire, roll bar, sold
DE instructor since 1985
Frank

Last edited by FPB111; 09-13-2018 at 12:10 PM..
Old 09-13-2018, 12:08 PM
  Pelican Parts Catalog | Tech Articles | Promos & Specials    Reply With Quote #34 (permalink)
Nice guy eddie
 
speeder's Avatar
 
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Location: los angeles, CA.
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You forgot, “if you can’t be careful, be prepared.”
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"It was either Voltaire or Charlie Sheen who said, 'We are born alone. We live alone. We die alone. And anything in between that can give us the illusion that we're not, we cling to.'" -
-- Gabriel byrne
Old 09-13-2018, 12:30 PM
  Pelican Parts Catalog | Tech Articles | Promos & Specials    Reply With Quote #35 (permalink)
Nice guy eddie
 
speeder's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2001
Location: los angeles, CA.
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“That’s the most degrading thing I’ve ever done five times.”
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Denis
"It was either Voltaire or Charlie Sheen who said, 'We are born alone. We live alone. We die alone. And anything in between that can give us the illusion that we're not, we cling to.'" -
-- Gabriel byrne
Old 09-13-2018, 12:31 PM
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Steve Carlton's Avatar
 
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Location: SF east bay
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Quote:
Originally Posted by wdfifteen View Post
"Poor planning and lack of foresight does not constitute an emergency."
I think that's supposed to be "Poor planning on your part does not constitute an emergency on my part."

"Slicker than snot on tile."

"Rare as rocking horse manure."

"Nervous as a long-tailed cat at a rocking chair factory."
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08 HP2 Sport
95 Triumph Tiger
85 911 Carrera
Old 09-13-2018, 12:37 PM
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That makes as much sense as a screen door on a submarine...
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Eddie
2007 Trailblazer SS
70 914/6 3.2
19?? VW woods buggy
1989 Cherokee Crawler

Last edited by dheinz; 09-13-2018 at 12:59 PM.. Reason: Sp
Old 09-13-2018, 12:51 PM
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Never left, but not right
 
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Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: Long Beach CA
Posts: 30,563
When it's obvious what you are doing and someone asks what you're doing, my dad would say, "Making a pair of pants for a fish."
Old 09-13-2018, 12:55 PM
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Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Orlando, Fl
Posts: 286
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It's raining harder than a bull pi$$ing on a flat rock.
Old 09-13-2018, 01:10 PM
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