Boating and chipping in for gas

[Flat Six]

Originally Posted by McLovin

Sure, showing up with a bottle of wine is often done for a formal dinner party. But not always. It depends.

But you don’t slip the host a $20, pay a utility bill or mow the lawn.

My rules:

1) I never show up empty handed. Wine, beer, flowers, dessert, something.
2) I always ask how I can help. After dinner when the host starts clearing, I don't ask -- just start clearing too.
3) I follow up with a 'thank you' a day or two later. Used to send a thank you note via snail mail (yes, even to close friends), now it's a text, email, or phone call. I must be getting soft.
4) I try to find a way to reciprocate -- dinner at our place next time, something like that.

How I was raised. I don't necessarily expect the same from others, but I appreciate it when they treat me the same way. If they don't, no big deal. But after a couple of instances where a guest makes no meaningful effort to acknowledge my hospitality (BTW, this is the situation the OP describes, in my opinion) or to reciprocate in some way, they don't get invited back. Totally different if an outing or event is a gift of some kind, but that's how I roll.

[Flat Six]

Originally Posted by Baz

The world is divided into two types of people.

Competitors and collaborators.

I like having collaborators as friends - not competitors.

Same thing in business.

^+1

Same concept, but I view as people who take and people who share.

[Skillet83]

Originally Posted by dmcummins

My wife wants me to take her friends husband fishing. I’ve taken him 3-4 times in the past. He stops and buys about $10 in bait. We go out for the day and when we get back he heads to his car.

I generally burn at least $200 if I go offshore. Guides here get $1,500 to $2,000 per day.

I told my wife I’m not taking him anymore, it bothers me that he doesn’t offer to help clean the boat or chip in for gas. He has owned a boat in the past, and he can well afford it. So he should have a idea what it cost and time to clean and flush the boat.

He is a nice enough guy, but except for our wife’s being friends we do nothing together.

My friends always chip in, and my son at least cleans the fish and helps out with the boat and gets bait.

I’m going out this weekend and taking my son, my wife wants me to ask this guy to go along. It doesn’t cost me anymore to take him, but I said no. The wife’s not mad, but she’s not happy either.

Am I being unreasonable expecting something. I’d be happy with $50, i don’t know why it bothers me so much, but it does.

Now I gladly take friends out for a boat ride or load up to go to the sandbar or beach and I don’t want anything for that. But this bothers me.

I would be more pissed off that he does not help with the cleanup, getting things squared away after a day on the water. Total dik move.