need a list on how to please a woman

[CamB]

Originally posted by stevepaa
Okay, I need serious suggestions.

My daughter's boyfriend does not have a clue on how to woo a woman. No flowers, no cards, no suprise dinner outs, the guy is lame. They are both in mid 20's.

This makes me think of a couple of things:

1) I hope the three items aren't a complete list of what my wife is expecting from me, 'cause she only gets the flowers and only about 1x per year I am a constant disappointment to my mother in this regard

2) If a girlfriend - or worse, her father or mother - ever handed me a book on what I needed to do to make the girlfriend happy, I'd be pissed off

Other than that, I can't decide whether he is a lazy ass or your daughter is unrealistic (a problem affecting a vast percentage of both the male and female population, IMHO).

(edit) in case it matters, I'm (only just) still in my late 20s and my wife is mid 20s. She was under 20 when we started going out.

[911pcars]

A friend (woman) sent this to me today. Seems appropo:

<<
Subject: Mens New College Courses
For those of you who are married, were married, or are contemplating marriage - under the assumption that men need (or ought) to be trained for marriage. Southwest Tech is offering a new 2 year associates degree....

TWO YEAR DEGREE: Becoming a Real Man. That's right, in just six mini-mesters, you too can be a real man as well as earn an associates degree in MA (Male Arts). Please take a moment to look over the program outline.

FIRST YEAR:
Autumn Schedule:
MEN 101 Combating Stupidity
MEN 102 You, Too, Can Do Housework
MEN 103 PMS-Learn When to Keep Your Mouth Shut
MEN 104 We Do Not Want Sleazy Under things for Christmas

Winter Schedule:
MEN 110 Wonderful Laundry Techniques
MEN 111 Understanding the Female Response to getting in at 2AM
MEN 112 Parenting: It Doesn't End with Conception
EAT 100 Get a Life, Learn to Cook
EAT 101 Get a Life, Learn to Cook II
ECON 001A What's Hers is Hers

Spring Schedule:
MEN 120 How NOT to Act Like a Buttface When You're Wrong
MEN 121 Understanding Your Incompetence
MEN 122 YOU, the Weaker Sex
MEN 123 Reasons to Give Flowers
ECON 001C What Was Yours is Hers

SECOND YEAR:
Autumn Schedule:
SEX 101 You CAN Fall Asleep without It
SEX 102 Morning Dilemma: If It's Awake, Take a Shower
SEX 103 How to Stay Awake After Sex
MEN 201 How to Put the Toilet Seat Down
Elective (See Electives Below)

Winter Schedule:
MEN 210 The Remote Control: Overcoming Your Dependency
MEN 211 How to Not Act Younger than Your Children
MEN 212 You, Too, Can Be a Designated Driver
MEN 213 Honest, You Don't Look Like Tom Cruise or Billy Dee
MEN 230A Her Birthdays and Anniversaries Are Important

Spring Schedule:
MEN 220 Omitting %&*! from Your Vocabulary (Pass/Fail Only)
MEN 221 Fluffing the Blanket After Farting Is Not Necessary
MEN 222 Real Men Ask for Directions
MEN 223 Thirty Minutes of Begging is NOT Considered Foreplay
MEN 230B Her Birthdays and Anniversaries Are Important 2

Course Electives:
EAT 201 Cooking with Tofu
EAT 202 Utilization of Eating Utensils
EAT 203 Burping and Belching Discreetly
MEN 231 Mothers-in-law
MEN 232 Appear to Be Listening
MEN 233 Just Say "Yes, Dear"
ECON 001C Cheaper to Keep Her

Just a thought for all the women out there...
MENtal illness, MENstrual cramps, MENtal breakdown, MENopause, GUYnocologist (poetic spelling).

Ever notice how all of women's problems start with men? Send this to
all of the women you know (and men with a sense of humor) and brighten
their day!!!...and when we have real trouble, it's a HISterectomy.
>>


Sherwood

[tabs]

Show her your non Gruppe sticker and tell her you don't belong to any Gruppe....

[widebody911]

Then again, how involved should you be with stepchildren?

[stevepaa]

widebody911
Not stepchildren, my two daughters were adopted as infants.

[stevepaa]

Sherwood
Thanks. That was good for a chuckle. I'll send that to all my kids.

[Superman]

Yeah, it's kinda funny. But then, I've grown tired of both man-bashing and woman-bashing. And again, I'm not sure how supportive I can get toward folks who view relationships as contests to see what you can get the other person to do, or stop doing. Mercifully, I am bearing down on the (usually) mature age of fifty, and it looks like both males and females in my age group are tired of playing games.

[widebody911]

Originally posted by Superman
Mercifully, I am bearing down on the (usually) mature age of fifty, and it looks like both males and females in my age group are tired of playing games.

At the ripe old age of 37, it looks like things are just warming up. Seems like most of the women in this age group have been through their starter marriage by now and are anxious to make the Big Kill to keep them shopping for years to come, and they need to do it soon before they age much more and hit the big 40. Some of these are pretty comical; near-40-somethings going out and getting tatoos and nose rings in a last ditch effort to avoid being thrown overboard into the the Sea of Middle Age.

[tabs]

I got news for you boyz.....it seems that men like the new models that come out every year....leaving plenty of used and still servicable women available.....it really tends to get easier.....