Quote of the year Contest!

[livi]

I have spent the better part of an hour trying to find a post by John Walker on reversing the windshield wipers. I think it was at least one or two years ago. John was giving advice to pay attention so as not ending up wiping the front hood. I remember laughing so hard. John has a talent for stating the facts with an undertone of dry humor that is very much to my taste.

Alas canīt find it.


(spell check kaput)

[notfarnow]

Originally Posted by livi

I have spent the better part of an hour trying to find a post by John Walker on reversing the windshield wipers. I think it was at least one or two years ago. John was giving advice to pay attention so as not ending up wiping the front hood. I remember laughing so hard. John has a talent for stating the facts with an undertone of dry humor that is very much to my taste.

Alas canīt find it.


(spell check kaput)

I have to agree with that. John has a way of posting really helful info with a dry wit that just knocks you down. I have laughed out loud at some of his wry comments in 911 technical & engine rebuilding section.

[rammstein]

The year is coming to an end soon, and I've seen a lot of great quotes that you guys should be submitting for the committee to consider.

I'll offer this up as well- there will be a PRIZE to the winner. A real prize. I swear.

[CJFusco]

I had a gem not too long ago, but it seems to have disappeared into the aether. Someone was talking about stirring up a legal pot or something (might have been that class-action suit against x3m, who was paid for supercharger systems and never delivered) and my reply was "let the record show that (so-and-so) wants to legalize pot."

I think the thread-in-question ended up being deleted/locked

[rammstein]

That's the task for everyone basically, finding the quotes and posting them here... the committee cannot be expected to do any legwork. Think of me like the federal government!

[CJFusco]

But the thread is locked! It was in the 944 forum... surely someone can come to my rescue?!?

[Overpaid Slacker]

Originally Posted by rammstein

That's the task for everyone basically, finding the quotes and posting them here... the committee cannot be expected to do any legwork. Think of me like the federal government!

So we're going to have to pay tax on the PRIZE?

Typical.

JP

[Palum6o]

I'm trying to find a good one from Charles Kieffner

[Porsche_monkey]

Originally Posted by Palumbo

I'm trying to find a good one from Charles Kieffner

Is that the guy that doesn't have a cap button on his keyboard?

[Porsche_monkey]

Originally Posted by charleskieffner

for a measly 18 pack of beer.............i will bring my mapex drum kit w/7 "Z" cymbals over and i will guarantee by 1am he will never bother YOU AGAIN!

if he has dental fillings...................make that 10pm! LOL!


better yet for more effect find hot rod rat/roach VW bug/buggy/buggette/rail and slap a straight out TRi-MIL exhaust on it and tune it up at 11pm!

this sounds like alot of fun.............who can be louder!

My choice...although I never took him up on the offer.

[Christien]

Man, I forgot about this thread, and just had a great laugh re-reading the nominations!

The cratch-slapping poem is classic, stuff of legends. But for a real punch-line-type belly laugh, Jake's handjob post takes it, as far as I'm concerned!

[rammstein]

Please keep submitting them- the prize is going to be cool- don't miss out! As always, the official nominations are on the first post.

[Porsche-O-Phile]

I found the post defining "fluffer" in response to Livi's (innocent) post mentioning wanting a job being one to be both educational and entertaining. Nominated.

[Joeaksa]

Jake,

Just found this and glad to help! Worked with me an might as well pass it along!

Originally Posted by notfarnow
Joe,

I've had a splinter on the sole of my foot since Saturday. I've tried pressure, tweezers, needles all to no avail. It's been fking torture every step I take... I was considering going to the doctor.

I just went out to the garage and tried the Mityvac. Got the bugger out first try

if you were nearby I'd give you a fking handjob

BTW, a beer will do fine, no need for the other although I appreciate the thought! Had a lady friend take care of that situation last night...

~~~~~~~~~

Don't go around saying the world owes you a living, the world owes
you nothing; it was here first
- Mark Twain (1835-1910)

I find that the harder I work, the more luck I seem to have.
- Thomas Jefferson (1743-1826)

Copy from one, its plagiarism; copy from two, its research
- Wilson Mizner (1876-1933)

Research is what I'm doing when I don't know what I'm doing
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The secret of success is to know something nobody else knows
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Imagination is more important than knowledge

Make everything as simple as possible, but not simpler.

There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing
is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle.

The mistakes are all waiting to be made
- Chessmaster Savielly Grigorievitch Tartakower (1887-1956) on the
games opening position

A little inaccuracy sometimes saves a ton of explanation
- H. H. Munro (Saki) (1870-1916)

You got to be careful if you don't know where you're going, because
you might not get there
- Yogi Berra

It is not enough to do your best; you must know what to do, and THEN
do your best
- W. Edwards Deming

All my life I've wanted to be someone; I guess I should have been
more specific.
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Whether you think that you can, or that you can't, you are usually right
- Henry Ford (1863-1947)

Do, or do not. There is no try
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Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same.

A cynic is a man who knows the price of everything, and the value of nothing.

The only way to get rid of a temptation is to yield to it.

Experience is the name everyone gives to their mistakes.

The only thing worse than being talked about is not being talked about.
- Oscar Wilde (1854-1900)

Everyday I get up and look through the Forbes list of the richest
people in America. If I'm not there, I go to work.
- Robert Orben

Opportunities multiply as they are seized.
- Sun Tzu

The best way to predict the future is to invent it.
- Alan Kay

Whatever is begun in anger ends in shame.
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There is no free lunch.
- Milton Friedman

This world is a comedy to those that think, a tragedy to those that feel.
- Horace Walpole

When all think alike, no one is thinking very much
- Walter Lippmann (1889-1974)

Men talk because they have something to say; fools, because they have
to say something
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When people are free to do as they please, they usually imitate each other
- Eric Hoffer (1902-1983)

The only fool bigger than the person who knows it all is the person
who argues with him
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If history repeats itself, and the unexpected always happens, how
incapable must Man be of learning from experience?
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disagree all the time, then both are useless
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If a man does his best, what else is there?
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The nicest thing about egotists is that they don't talk about other people
- Lucille S. Harper

Criticism is prejudice made plausible

The cynics are right nine times out of ten
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A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity, an optimist
sees the opportunity in every difficulty
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Love is what happens to a man and a woman who don't know each other

Love is only a dirty trick played on us to achieve the continuation
of the species
- W. Somerset Maugham

[911Rob]

This one made me burst out laughing........

Originally Posted by Rick V

This entire thread works
http://forums.pelicanparts.com/showthread.php?t=361107&highlight=slutty

I also think Legions post from Lendaddy deserves to qualify!!
That was funny!

Cheers

[charlesbahn]

From Rino757

Originally Posted by reino757

Does anyone want a free gererator? Yep, there could be a device coming to market this year; a generator powered partly by Kinetic energy! The first 1.6 mil. people that sign up to witness the technology are allotted the FREE use of said device and will NEVER have to pay another electric bill... This sounds too good to be true, but I do believe it will happen this year!!! here's the link for more info.........http://www.bizarrefun.com/FreeElectricity.htm

[rammstein]

Submitted and approved by committee:

Originally Posted by cairns

Be sure to see how many lights it has. Lights are important. That way you know the equalizer is working.

[rammstein]

The 'gererator' quote, while hilarious and certainly of high enough caliber, falls outside of the allowable date range.

Remember, the date has to end in 2007. Meaning xx/xx/2007.

Only a couple more weeks to go people- scavange for your favorites, and have your eyes open for other winners. I caught one today.

You have to submit them for them to be considered.

Just go to the post you like. Click quote. Highlight the quoted reply text. Copy it. Come back here. Hit reply- paste your copied text. Say "here you go, dear committee".

[Joe Bob]

Originally Posted by rammstein

If someone can point me to this, the committee would like to see it in it's original context.

He's listed as a screen name of "The Howard Agency", he sadly passed away just a bit ago....OT poster and 914,2.0; 914,v8 and 996 pilot.

[craigster59]

I like this one posted by 125shifter in the "boycott thread"

Quote: "I boycott them too, but only because their beer tastes like crap . Believe me, when I boycott a beer company, it shows up in their quarterly reports."