Nursing homes are creepy

[peppy]

My mom has been in one since May, and I really get the creeps there.

I guess technically it is a retirement home.

Mom has been moved to the Alzheimer's wing (she wonders off) and every time go I to visit someone asks me to take them somewhere.

Anyone else find them a bit creepy?

[bell]

My wife works for a county hospice in FL, she sees nice homes and horrible ones, their level of creepyness depends varies......hopefully your mom is in a nice one.

[red-beard]

Yep, My grand-dad was in the "rest home"

[peppy]

bell, she is in a good one, just some of the residents are.....well it is part of the disease.

[Seahawk]

Originally Posted by peppy

Anyone else find them a bit creepy?

For years I would go pick up my wife's Grandfather at his nursing home, bring him to our home for the day, nearly every weekend.

The only thing I found creepy was the abandonment, the warehousing of fine people.

Grandpa Jack was a man all of you would have been honored to know. He loved the Targa, still had enough hair for the wind. I can say that if god has a sense of humor Jack was at the head of the line. Irish. Most days he'd ask to take the long way back.

We should all be so lucky.

[Sunroof]

My grandmother died in the nursing home at the age of 94. Amazingly, she had all her faculties and an amazing sense of humor. It gave me the creeps to walk in since their was a certain sterility to it, more like a hospital setting or ward, but you seemed to get past all that once you sat in the room with her which added the great human element. It was in essence the place for the elderly to live out their remaining days as morbid as that might sound. That was over thirty years ago, so I will assume that today's nursing home or care center might have a warmer or homier feel to it. I have to wonder though if the quality of care is any better. She died of a urinary track infection, which was due to neglect on behalf of the home, but charges were never filed back then.

I'll take the old veterans home instead , if they still exist!

Bob

[kach22i]

Originally Posted by peppy

My mom has been in one since May, and I really get the creeps there.

I guess technically it is a retirement home.

Mom has been moved to the Alzheimer's wing (she wonders off) and every time go I to visit someone asks me to take them somewhere.

Anyone else find them a bit creepy?

I took a tour of one of those places, a higher end one, real nice.

My grandmother is in a less nice place, but it's clean and well run, more sad than creepy - four in a room to save cost.

If you can define the creep factor in architectural terms I'll keep it in mind (architect). I'm trying to get a project started in this area, have a few zoning hurdles first.

[Zeke]

I took a contract to do some painting in one. The problem with that is painters traditionally wear white uniforms. We had people begging us all day long for anything you can think of. It was hard to turn away, but we had to.

I'll never go in one again if I can help it.

[rcecale]

I always thought that a great video for "Already Gone" by The Eagles would have been a story of an old person escaping from one of those sterile nursing/retirement homes...

Well, I heard some people talkin' just the other day
And they said you were gonna put me on a shelf
But let me tell you I got some news for you
And you'll soon find out it's true
And then you'll have to eat your lunch all by yourself
'Cause I'm already gone
And I'm feelin' strong
I will sing this vict'ry song, woo, hoo,hoo,my my woo,hoo,hoo

The letter that you wrote me made me stop and wonder why
But I guess you felt like you had to set things right
Just remember this, my girl, when you look up in the sky
You can see the stars and still not see the light (that's right)

And I'm already gone
And I'm feelin' strong
I will sing this vict'ry song, woo, hoo,hoo my my ,woo, hoo,hoo

Well I know it wasn't you who held me down
Heaven knows it wasn't you who set me free
So often times it happens that we live our lives in chains
And we never even know we have the key

But me, I'm already gone
And I'm feelin' strong
I will sing this vict'ry song
'Cause I'm already gone
Yes, I'm already gone
And I'm feelin' strong
I will sing this vict'ry song
'Cause I'm already gone
Yes, I'm already gone
Already gone
All right, nighty-night



Randy

[pwd72s]

Funny...I always thought of that as a breaking up song....but it fits here, doesn't it?

[widgeon13]

My 97 YO mom is in an Alzheimer's unit. I see her for an hour or so every couple of weeks. It is exhausting to spend that time, not because I don't enjoy the time but it's just emotionally draining. She recognizes me but the conversation is limited.

Just guess we'll all possibly be there someday!

My father's mother died at 109 and never spent more than one day in a hospital. She lived in a home for single retired women. Kilda was my grandmother. Hope I have her genes.

[VINMAN]

I hate them!. Unfortunately we are tryin get get my dad into one. He needs 24 hr care now. His demetia and physical capacity are forcing us to. I dread it.

We have a few in my town that we are in at least once or twice a week for fire calls. Most are false alarms. Whats really sad is, a lot of the alarms are from the residents activating the pull stations, because they know the firemen will come and they will have someone to talk to. So they pull them on purpose. When we get there they think that we are their children or relative. It can be pretty heartbreaking at times. But I learned to try to ignore it.

They also vary in atmosphere too. Few of them are your typical cold hospital like setups, where they residents just linger in the hallways like zombies. The others ones are more like country clubs. Very nice places.

Either way I hope I croak before I have to end up in one of them

[peppy]

I don't think this is a bad place. It has about 25 residents and they are all in different stages of Alzheimer's.

I always get asked to take someone somewhere, or were something is, and when I tell them that I can't they get mad and walk away.

A few weeks ago I am visiting mom with my 2yo. A lady comes in the room and uses the bathroom with the door open #2.

I guess I just haven't gotten used to it yet.

[TheMentat]

My grandmother is in a pretty sweet one... I'd definitely move in if all those single folks were about 50 years younger!

[Rick Lee]

I dread ever having to deal with this for my folks. I was in two nursing homes in China in January, one for the party elite and one for the regular folks. The former was pretty good, almost as nice as ours. The latter was the kind of place you really don't want to ever see. I've been to a few in eastern Germany too and they were pretty sad.

[Hugh R]

Had my MIL in one for recovery from some issues for about a month. She lives with us now and is pretty mobile. The place she was in had old people in their 90's or more, strapped into wheelchairs with bladder bags attached. I don't know if those people were even aware that they were alive. The threads earlier about rationing healtcare, and spending $100K's in the last few months of some people's lives give you something to think about.

[onewhippedpuppy]

Creepy and sad. Many just seem like waiting rooms for the funeral parlor. As Paul said, many just seem full of people abandoned by their loved ones.

[Tidybuoy]

Long, long time ago, I delivered the San Francisco Examiner (an afternoon paper). I had a few customers in a rest home and for a little boy, it was scary. They all acted like they knew me and would grab me as I ran down the hall to deliver the paper. It was a real live horror house.

[VINMAN]

One of the homes we respond to had a resident, a old guy probably in his late
80's that was always in the lounge by the front door. When ever we pulled up with the firetrucks, he'd run to the door and stand outside and yell at us to get in formation, and prepare for inspection. We'd say hello to him and walk past him, then he would start screaming that we were disobeying orders and would be court martialed. When I was Chief he'd tell me I'd better get my platoon in line. He did this every time we went there. It was hysterical. We called him the colonel
We always saluted him, and a few times stopped to humor him. Id stand there listen to his war stories and talk with him. Then one day went on a call there and didnt see him. I asked the clerk where he was, and she said he passed away a few days ago. That killed me.

[on2wheels52]

A different vein than the Eagles, from John Prine

"We had an apartment in the city,
Me and Loretta liked living there.
Well, it'd been years since the kids had grown,
A life of their own left us alone.
John and Linda live in Omaha,
And Joe is somewhere on the road.
We lost Davy in the Korean war,
And I still don't know what for, don't matter anymore.

Chorus:
Ya' know that old trees just grow stronger,
And old rivers grow wilder ev'ry day.
Old people just grow lonesome
Waiting for someone to say, "Hello in there, hello."

Me and Loretta, we don't talk much more,
She sits and stares through the back door screen.
And all the news just repeats itself
Like some forgotten dream that we've both seen.
Someday I'll go and call up Rudy,
We worked together at the factory.
But what could I say if asks "What's new?"
"Nothing, what's with you? Nothing much to do."

Repeat Chorus:

So if you're walking down the street sometime
And spot some hollow ancient eyes,
Please don't just pass 'em by and stare
As if you didn't care, say, "Hello in there, hello."

Jim