My friend does crazy stuff

[trekkor]

So he catches this baby rattle snake in his yard.
He figures he'll let it go somewhere else. ( first mistake )

He puts it in a tupperware type container. ( second mistake )

He puts it in his van and heads out. ( third mistake )

Then he leaves it unattended in the sun ( fourth mistake )


The lid came off and the snake is *somewhere* in his van.

Now he wears boots while driving and has to wear thick gloves when looking for tools or supplies.

It's been a few days...


I asked him: "what did you learn from this?"

He said something about putting a rubber band around the container next time


KT

[slodave]

I hope that your friend knows that baby rattlers don't control their venom and give you the complete load. More deaths occur from babies than from adults.

[DasBoot]

LOL.

[trekkor]

What kind of crazy things do your friends ( not you of course ) do?


KT

[DasBoot]

Originally Posted by trekkor

What kind of crazy things do your friends ( not you of course ) do?


KT

A buddy tried to kill a cockroach on his (very dry) wooden fence with a propane torch. Cockroach caught fire and took off into a knot-hole/crack and disappeared. A few hours later, while sitting inside his home, buddy hears "crackling" sound from the backyard. Fence is engulfed.

Cockroach - 1
DumbAss - 0

[Heel n Toe]

That's pretty funny about the baby rattler escaping from Tupperware Jail.

It won't live very long in his van without a source of water.

He will know it's dead when it starts to stink... he should keep wearing the boots and gloves until then. He should also be aware of where the nearest hospital or Doc-In-A-Box is at all times. It would also be a good idea to find out who has a good stock of antivenin and if he needs to be able to tell them what subspecies the snake was... it probably doesn't matter, but I would at least find out.

Or not... it might be too small to generate very much odor.

Just for laughs, tell him someone told you they like to climb and that it will probably drop down from the visor and bite him in the face.

[bell]

get a rattlesnake ringer for your cell phone........
hide in truck...........
call it

[Porsche-O-Phile]

Darwinism at its finest... Only if he gets bitten though. Preferably on the balls so he won't breed.

I've got a rubber snake I can sell ya that's about 3' long. I think it'd fit in his underwear drawer nicely if you want to have some fun with this...

[cl8ton]

Originally Posted by DasBoot

Cockroach caught fire and took off into a knot-hole/crack and disappeared.

LOL! Shudda used Berrymans...air wrenches best friend...insects worse nightmare

[trekkor]

He told some crazy rattle snake joke about two guys in the woods, one gets bit on the...


KT

[trekkor]

He's trying to become an EMT.
He told one of his buddies: "If you hear a call about a car crash with a snake bite...It's me!"



KT

[onewhippedpuppy]

I'm not sure if the snake or fence story is better. Good stuff.

[Jeff Higgins]

Reminds me of the recording of the 911 call where the guy hit a deer with his car. Thought he killed it, so he put it in the back seat to bring it home and butcher it. It wasn't dead...

[legion]

I was always the guy in college who talked my friends out of stupid stunts and kept them out of jail.

Where to start...

Two friends were out at the bars in downtown Normal. Our apartment was a short walk (maybe 2/3 of a mile) down the train tracks. As they were walking home, they noticed a freight train on the tracks just starting to pick up speed and heading in the right direction. If it's a short walk, it's an even shorter train ride, right? Well, those things apparently accelerate faster than one would think, and by the time they reached the apartment, they had to jump and role, not gently step off as they had hoped.

***

Cory...

Cory does two things when he drinks, he takes off his clothes, and he wanders off--rarely at the same time (thank God). The second time we went to Jimmy Buffett, we rented a bus to take the group. Cory wandered off halfway through the concert inside the venue. After the concert, we decided to form 3 search parties to look for him. The people who opted not to got settled in and started to remove coolers and chairs from under the bus. We opened one of the doors to the underside of the bus and there was Cory, passed out and asleep.

The weekend before graduation from college, Cory came down to visit. For the first time ever, we were heading back from the bars WITH CORY. We were in the back of my friend Doug's pickup truck. We stop at a red light...and Cory hops out of the truck and takes off running. We found him at 5:00 in the morning running around a baseball diamond miles away with a stop sign--pole and all--running the bases.

A few years later at Jimmy Buffett, we had made it back to the bus after the concert. Cory did not run off this time. I was standing at the door to the bus and suddenly something is thrust into my hands. It's Cory, he says: "Hold this." I then realize I have his shorts and boxers. He then proceeds to go streaking in the open area around our bus with only his shirt on. This presents a problem, so he lifts his shirt like he is doing a curtsy and proceeds to frolic in the field--without any pants on. I later heard that he had been pestering his wife to let him streak. "Can I get naked? Can I? Please? Can I get naked?" Apparently she rolled her eyes and said: "Okay." That's when he handed me his clothes.

The last time Cory came down to visit (about 4 years ago), he was a firefighter/EMT by this point. He had a habit of flashing his badge to bouncers and walking into bars, leaving his friends to wait in line. Often, by the time we got into the bar he had already moved on to another one. So this is how he ditched us that time. (I had tired of Cory's antics by the second time I met him. My other friends thought they were HI-LAR-I-OUS for years.) Cory has this habit of turning off his cell phone when he wanders. We pretty much said screw him and went back to my house. (Other people were finally tiring of his antics too.) He started calling us to come get him--but intentionally confusing directions so that it was a "search". We finally found him. My friend Nick was livid. He left Cory in the back of his pickup truck to sleep off the booze, and it was February.

[legion]

Dan, Mike, a box of firecrackers, and a 16th floor dorm room...

Dan and Mike had this genius idea to toss firecrackers out of Dan's 16th floor dorm room window. Of course, the designers of the building had thought of this possibility and mounted permanent screens on all of the windows. Mike figured out that if he wedged himself against the wall and put his feet against the screen frame, he could created a 1 inch gap at the bottom of the screen. So Dan would light firecrackers and drop them through the gap. They would go off before hitting the ground. Well, one missed the gap, bounced off the screen, and landed on Dan's bed. When it went off, it set his sheets on fire. Dan and Mike put out the fire and came down to my room to wait out the smoke clearing. Perhaps the funniest part of this story was that Dan was able to repair his bed sheets. He had a pair of flannel boxer shorts that were the same exact pattern as his sheets that he used to cover the burned portion.

[Eric 951]

At a party in downtown Pittsburgh during college, we are hanging out in a second-floor apartment, which is directly above a main street(Forbes Avenue) and bar. There are always cops in front of the bar working the door(off-duty, but in unifrom). The party was packed and my buddy (who disliked police at the time but is now a detective) comes into the living room quickly and says "we have to go NOW" so we proceed down the back stairwell. As we are exiting, I see several cops running UP the front stairs, and my buddy is laughing hystericaly...turns out he dumped a beer on a cop from the second story. Never did find out who got busted for it.

[Rick Lee]

Originally Posted by Eric 951

At a party in downtown Pittsburgh during college, we are hanging out in a second-floor apartment, which is directly above a main street(Forbes Avenue) and bar. There are always cops in front of the bar working the door(off-duty, but in unifrom). The party was packed and my buddy (who disliked police at the time but is now a detective) comes into the living room quickly and says "we have to go NOW" so we proceed down the back stairwell. As we are exiting, I see several cops running UP the front stairs, and my buddy is laughing hystericaly...turns out he dumped a beer on a cop from the second story. Never did find out who got busted for it.

Which bar was this? I went to Pitt and spent plenty of time in every bar on Forbes, playing with my band, playing pinball at CJ's and hitting the happy hours.

Back when Univ. Beverage Center was on Forbes Ave. and I was pledging, a few of the brothers actually managed the place. I got sent there to buy cups one night. While standing on line to pay, I heard over the store intercom, "Pig! Get the f*ck into the back office". The brothers had seen me on their security monitors. I went back to the office, where they had a keg tapped and made me do some power drinking with them. They used to take a few beers off the top of each keg. Ah, good times.

[notfarnow]

Originally Posted by legion

I was always the guy in college who talked my friends out of stupid stunts and kept them out of jail.

Ha, I was the guy they talked INTO stupid stunts

2am on a thursday in Montreal, so drunk I couldn't spit, wearing a short skirt, lipstick and a 4 day beard, leaning against the cop car as they typed my name into the montreal prostitution database.... my friends taking pictures from the balcony above.

I won the $20 bucks though

[arerrac]

So, my buddy and I driving around in my GTI in high school. He's got a bottle-rocket he wants’ to shoot off.

Before I know what's going on, he decided to hold it in his hand and shoot it out the window. He gets it lit, it takes of (burning his hand) hits the top of the door frame, zings across to my side ricocheting off my window, back down to his lap where it goes off. Blow's a hole in his pants and burns his thigh.

I'm cracking up as the smoke cleared. Never tried that on again.

-W

[onewhippedpuppy]

Myself and my friends nearly all had old trucks in high school. Every 4th of July, we'd have roman candle wars. In our trucks. While driving. Good times.......