Up Talking = Obnoxious!

[dennis in se pa]

NPR Media Player

My daughter has picked up this HABIT? You KNOW? Where she ends all of her sentences as if she is asking a QUESTION? It is obnoxious. It is worse than "Valley Girl" talk.

Maybe I am just getting old. And grumpy. And mean.

Here is another. Enjoy!

http://www.bing.com/videos/search?q=up+talking+obnoxious&FORM=VIRE3#view=detail&mid=ADB1FEEEBEFD9B48B4E1ADB1FEEEBEFD9B48B4E1

[widgeon13]

I feel your pain.

[Gretch]

A reflection the speaker's lack of audience interaction and self centered nature. Something to be expected from a young person, really off putting in a so called "adult".

[74-911]

Originally Posted by dennis in se pa

......Maybe I am just getting old. And grumpy. And mean.

Bingo !!!

[Oh Haha]

Disclaimer>>>>>>I grew up in a border town to Canada.

Many Canadians I have talked with over the years speak this way. Yes, they use "ay" at the the end of sentences but when they don't it still sounds like a question versus a statement.

I never found it obnoxious, just different.

[Rick V]

Yeah it gets on my nerves as well and for the most part it is a regional accent and I try to let is pass as such but when my daughter started doing it a few years ago I reminded her she was born and raised in Va not the UP of Mish and stayed on her about it until she quit

[Oh Haha]

Ha, I did the same with my daughter. I asked her if she was making a statement or asking me a question. She gave me the deer in headlights stare for a moment.


I did not nor do we live in the UP.

[Rick V]

You don't live in the UP, you simply exist

[dennis in se pa]

UP thing? I live in SE PA. It is all over here with the kids 14-28. My son is 27, thank God he doesn't talk like this.

So 74-911 is this how you speak?

[recycled sixtie]

I think discipline or correction is needed if your child's talk irritates you. A lot worse is no discipline where the parent thinks the child can do no wrong and goes through life uncorrected. Dennis and Rick you are doing it right.

The Canadian ay/eh thing does come up with some folks up here. I think it stems from a different approach to life. Americans I think generally are more independent minded. They don't need consensus to carry on. Some Canadians need that consensus or opinion from others because they feel the need for others input. To a certain extent I agree with that but I don't use the eh/ay? word but just simply ask "what do you think".

It's just a different culture here. Amazing differences between the two countries delineated by a border.

Guy

[pavulon]

It's not just kids. It is adults as well. In adults, it imparts a message of insecurity in the topic. personally hear "I'm telling you this but have no confidence in what I am saying--effectively, I'm thinking aloud because organizing this stuff in my head before speaking is too much work and I need to be in this conversation because I need your attention more than you need this half-baked information"

[74-911]

Originally Posted by dennis in se pa

UP thing? I live in SE PA. It is all over here with the kids 14-28. My son is 27, thank God he doesn't talk like this.

So 74-911 is this how you speak?

No but my grandkids do sometimes....

the "bingo" also describes me.

[Drisump]

Originally Posted by Oh Haha

Disclaimer>>>>>>I grew up in a border town to Canada.

Many Canadians I have talked with over the years speak this way. Yes, they use "ay" at the the end of sentences but when they don't it still sounds like a question versus a statement.

I never found it obnoxious, just different.

Don't hang this on us buddy.....LOL. That "Valley girl" ending on a sentence is enough for "extreme prejudicial" comment when it is performed. I don't personally use "ay" but somehow (within our culture at least) doesn't seem to infer the same BS. ie "do you understand this very simple concept?" Perhaps "ay" has such a long and illustrious history it is accepted as a cultural oddity and no one notices....don't let the valley girl uptalk become a permanent and accepted part of yours Cheers

[john70t]

Handwriting analysis is sometimes a predictor of a person's personality:
-Tight and square letters equals the same mentality.
-Ditto with sloppy.
-Starting large and ending small equals a lack of self esteem.
-Sentences ending with an upswing on the line equals a positive outlook.

I view the Canadian "aye" thing as positive and same as "am I right" or "what do you think".
It's more of an open ended statement instead of a bossy declaration of empirical fact.
It also imparts both a desire to connect with the other person and an ability to self-reflect and adapt to others.

The conversation is two-way.

[scottmandue]

So yaknow it's totally like yaknow like yaknow?

[Rick V]

Originally Posted by scottmandue

So yaknow it's totally like yaknow like yaknow?

As if, like totally gag me with a spoon.....ay

[Z-man]

Up talking is one of my most annoying pet peeves?

I really hate it?!

When I hear it on the radio in the car I start to mimick them?

And yell to myself STOP ASKING QUESTIONS!!!!?

[recycled sixtie]

Originally Posted by john70t

I view the Canadian "aye" thing as positive and same as "am I right" or "what do you think".
It's more of an open ended statement instead of a bossy declaration of empirical fact.
It also imparts both a desire to connect with the other person and an ability to self-reflect and adapt to others.

The conversation is two-way.

Thanks for that John. It's like you opened the window and let the fresh air in.
Guy

[wdfifteen]

Few people I know in person up-talk. My wife only does it when she's talking to Siri. She makes, "Siri, navigate to Someplace," sound like a question instead of a demand. I hear it more on reality TV shows than in person.

BTW John I liked your response.

[911SauCy]

Originally Posted by pavulon

It's not just kids. It is adults as well. In adults, it imparts a message of insecurity in the topic. personally hear "I'm telling you this but have no confidence in what I am saying--effectively.

Spot on.

Get her to stop by helping her understand what it infers. Yes, I'm serious.

My boss "up-talks", he sounds like an idiot and is unfortunately (bc he's actually very smart) viewed as one with most of our clients.

At least where I'm from (Northeast) up-talking/inflecting volume at the end of a phrase/sentence infers a question. Making the other party aware that you are talking about something but really don't have confidence in your message or are looking for their assistance to complete. So, you come across as a talking head instead of a knowledgeable resource...

I become more valuable as these diminishing social intelligence trends continue.