Stijn!!

[GH85Carrera]

Tweeze, I watched the new version of Total Recall. Is that the guy you like to look at? I forgot his name but I think he is the lead in the movie.

[Porsche-poor]

Evening all.

[slodave]

Okay time to ***** and complain. I get to do that, since I feel like crap and my patience level is at 0%.

Why do the people at Subway not listen??? I clearly say: "mustard, lettuce, and bell peppers"... Yet, almost always, they pick up tomatoes after putting on the lettuce. Did I say tomatoes??? No! I said: mustard, lettuce, and bell peppers. If I wanted tomatoes, I would have asked for them!

[slodave]

You can't say b1tch? WTF? It's a female dog! What if I wanted to refer to a female dog? I'd get censored. ****!

[Porsche-poor]

I have the same issue with bell peppers.

[RKDinOKC]

You can say bell peppers without getting *ed.

Readers would fill in the *s much better with ***** and moan than ***** and complain. It's a context thing. Moaning is more common.

Found very few burger joints seem to be able to make a cheeseburger without ****ing pickles. ****ing McDonalds even put ****ing pickles on their ****ing Bacon ****ing Cheese ****ing Burger for **** sake. Who puts ****ing pickles on a ****ing BACON Cheese Burger, ****ing McDonalds, that's ****ing who. Oh yeah, and Yellow Mustard too, ****ers.

Talking like a Sailor and talking like a Pirate are completely different with a few exceptions like the use of the word tits.

[slodave]

You're even allowed to say ***** on TV! It's been said five times in a row on New Girl right now.

* eight times.

[Flieger]

I only caught the last couple minutes last night. Zooey Deschanel and The Simpsons are the only reasons I will watch fox.

[HHI944]

Take my 04 VDP to dealer with an weird 5-6-5 shift problem, starts to shift then reverts, only at higher RPMs and under load. Local dealer resets adaptions checks the intake elbow for tightness at the throttle body per ZF bulletins FOC because they just did a fluid change and tells me that if problem persists I'll likely need a new transmission, but everything seems fine.

A few days later, I take the car out of town and experience the problem again. I then drop it off at the dealer in that town with the copy of the service write up. They reset adaptions again and tell me that if the problem persists I'll need a new throttle body. Pick it up and the problem occurs again within just a few miles....and of course that's also within me handing over a nice chunk of change for their 'trouble' I go immediately back, the tech tries to read codes and says there are none...he's not sure what's going on but wants to replace the throttle body. I tell him that I need to get some lunch and think about my course of action. While at lunch, 8 trillion things go through my mind and I conclude that there simply must be an air leak somewhere past the MAF...so I remove the intake elbow in the cafe parking lot to inspect for cracks/pinholes etc....while loosening the MAF side clamp, I notice a warping in the elbow....and a very small pebble drops out when I pull the elbow off... I quickly wipe down the mating surfaces and reattach the elbow with the MAF side clamp just a little cock eyed to hold the warped section tight and go for a drive......perfect....and I seriously ran the car through the paces as well. Ordered a new elbow with my local shop, will be in Friday and I'll use a can of BG Throttle body cleaner and give her a new air filter as well just for good measure and peace of mind.

2 Jaguar certified gold technicians-0
Jackass me with a beer-1

When I told the second dealer I'd like my money back since they didn't actually properly diagnose and fix what turned out to be a very simple problem, I was told to pound sand. I managed to lay hands on the personal cell number of the owner of the dealership and he told me to pound sand as well.....CC told me they'd have the cash back in my account in 48 hrs based on my recorded statement.

[HHI944]

Anyone got any good ideas about what to do with this guys phone number?

[porsche4life]

Write it on lots if truckstop bathroom walls with free bj written next to it?

[slodave]

No, but I have an idea that you should sell that Jaguar. You'll still come out ahead at this point.

[HHI944]

I've thought about it a good bit and quite honestly, almost all of the problems go back to service issues and those that don't just aren't that onerous for the mileage I've put on the car. I'm gonna buy a mongoose cable, dedicated netbook and a pirate copy of IDS/SDD and just do stuff myself from now on.

Sid, I was thinking a few dozen craigslist ads for cars on their lot with his personal number might be fun.....or maybe one of those automated wakeup services set to call every 15 minutes from midnight to 5AM

[Rick V]

Morning Y'all

[Jim Richards]

Hey Rick. How's everything?

[Rick V]

Morning Jim, same as it ever was, how goes things in the land of the government?

[Outback Porsche]

Morning Gents.




Got this in a email this morning. My inner nerd had a giggle.

Subject: C# New Statements

Conditional Statements
WHAT IF
Used in simulation languages. Branches before evaluating the test condition.

OR ELSE
Conditional threat as in: "Add these two numbers OR ELSE"

WHY NOT
Executes the code that follows in a devil-may-care fashion

WHO ELSE
Used for polling during I/O operations

ELSEWHERE
This is where your program really is when you think it's here

GOING GOING GONE
For writing unstructured programs. Takes a random branch to another part of your program.
Does the work of a hundred GOTOs

Case Statements
JUST IN CASE
For handling afterthoughts and fudge factors.
Allows you to multiply by zero to correct for accidently dividing by zero

BRIEF CASE
To encourage portable software

OPEN AND SHUT CASE
No proof of correctness is necessary with this one

IN ANY CASE
This one always works

HOPELESS CASE
This one never works

BASKET CASE
A really HOPELESS CASE

Loop Statements
DON'T DO WHILE NOT
The loop is not executed if the test condition is not false (or it's Friday afternoon)

DIDN'T DO
The loop executes once and hides all traces

WON'T DO
The program stops because it doesn't like the code inside the loop.
Execution can be resumed by typing "MAY I" at the command line

MIGHT DO
Depends on how the program is feeling.
Executed if the CPU is "up", not executed if the CPU is "down" or if its feelings have been hurt

DO UNTO OTHERS
Used to write the main loop for operating systems to antagonize all programs in a uniform manner

DO WAH
Used to write loops for computer generated music (e.g. Rag Timing)

[Outback Porsche]

Then there was this email....

[Jim Richards]

My eyes!!!

Originally Posted by Rick V

Morning Jim, same as it ever was, how goes things in the land of the government?

Looney as ever. One massive "reality" show.

Yo ho, Jeff! Great email (the software one). It brings back memories of my code-slinging days. I had a coworker who would use highway names as integer variables in his FORTRAN code. He seemed to get a kick out of statements like GOTO US66, etc.

[Rick V]

Jeff, that picture is just WRONG!, I think I just threw up in my mouth a lot