10 Years Gone

[KFC911]

Originally Posted by legion

Yep. I'll consider meeting up with him in another ten years, but he's already caused me to waste more time on this than was merited.

Me too! Keep it too yourself next time

Well, maybe not....hard to pass a train wreck without looking...

[legion]

So after setting dates three times and not hearing from him, Bob contacted me in July and said he was in town and asked if I could grab a bite that evening. I said sure. I met up with him and had dinner, we each paid for our own meal.

On the plus, Bob owns a house, is married, and has a kid. He has managed to hold down the same job for 5 years. (When I previously saw him, he had never held down a job for 5 months and in high school he had trouble keeping one for five days.)

On the minus side, it's clear that he doesn't care about wasting other people's time. He still depends on other people to tell him when he should do things. I imagine his coworkers shoulder most of his workload.

He's asked me to take him shooting. The easiest way for me to deal with this is to tell him "yes" and then simply not follow through. (Telling him "no" might actually motivate him.) He's texted me three times asking for dates that I can take him. I give him a date, and the date passes. A few weeks later he asks for another one. I figure I'm doing him a favor, so I'm not going to babysit him and remind him. Knowing that he doesn't respect my time, I also make no effort to keep the date open. I give him a date 3 weeks to two months out that is open at the time I give it. If something else comes up along the way, I do that instead. In the off chance he actually tries to hold me to a date, it's TFB. I'm definitely not going to bother with rearranging anything for his sake. We've never even gotten to the point of discussing a time and a place.

[Evans, Marv]

I'd tell him you've decided to give up on the shooting activities and are looking around at other possible interests. So you don't have anything on the horizon and let him flow on down the river of past social contacts.

[sammyg2]

I'd prolly handle it a little differently.
Instead of stringing him along I'd say "go away and leave me alone, I don't like you".

But that's just me

[ckelly78z]

I am rigidly punctual, and always follow up. One of my biggest pet peeves is chronically late people who don't respect other's time. Life is too short to string along leeches.

[legion]

Originally Posted by sammyg2

I'd prolly handle it a little differently.
Instead of stringing him along I'd say "go away and leave me alone, I don't like you".

But that's just me

Then he'd get it in his mind that he'd need to convince me otherwise. And I'd have to argue with him. It might actually motivate him to follow through.

It's far easier to take advantage of his natural laziness.

[vash]

if he wrote you a bad check as a gift..how did that end up costing you $25? did i mis-read that part?

anyways..i would meet him. what do you have to lose. hell, buying him a beer isnt a big deal. be prepared to tell him how it is. i cant hide crap..my face tells most of the story, usually

[legion]

Originally Posted by vash

if he wrote you a bad check as a gift..how did that end up costing you $25? did i mis-read that part?

anyways..i would meet him. what do you have to lose. hell, buying him a beer isnt a big deal. be prepared to tell him how it is. i cant hide crap..my face tells most of the story, usually

That's the fee my bank charged me for depositing a bad check.

And I did meet him. And I have quite the poker face. I try not to let people know what I really think of them.