I've got a stalker what do I do ?

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[RANDY P]

Straight up tell her. Knock it off or he finds out.

If she doesn't well do it.

rjp

[dad911]

I would reply to text, tell her not interested and you are blocking her number. Then block the number.


Don't know your wife to offer advice there. I could tell/show my wife, and she would laugh about it.

[stomachmonkey]

When they get that crazy the husband threat is useless.

Years ago one of my best buds, B, and I worked at the same place. Our Director, D, was also a great friend and his wife was awesome.

We used to hang out together all the time.

One night during the week we are supposed to hit happy hour but I had to bail.

I get into the office the next morning and both B and D are there, still in the same clothes from the day before, looking like absolute hell.

I assume they got royally hammered and maybe spent the night in the pokey cause that's what they honestly looked like.

So I'm like "whats up" . B just looks at me shakes his head and mouths "I'll tell you later"

The three of them are out, having a great time as usual when D's wife looks at him and say's "I want a divorce, I'm in love with B"

It did not get better from there.

You need to tell your wife what's going on.

You can not avoid the drama.

If she finds out from somewhere else, (like your buds crazy wife), what was going on and you did not tell her she will be just as, if not more pissed than if you tell her now.

[wdfifteen]

"Your texts are making me uncomfortable. I am 100% devoted to my wife and marriage. I will defend them in any way I have to. I am afraid your attention is a threat to my marriage and to the life I have worked so hard to create for us. Please stop."

[drkshdw]

If he is truly a bro before hoes, he deserves to know what his wife is doing behind his back. Put yourself in his shoes...would you want to be told about it? Either way, if there is trouble in the relationship this could be used against her to save himself from the courts a little bit. And the sooner you tell your wife, the better. May not be easy today but it'll be easier than waiting til tomorrow.

[ckelly78z]

It's just like Dear Abby, show your wife this post, and some of the replies as well. This will keep her from getting mad at you, by showing that you are at wits end trying to figure out what to do.

I don't know if it would be wise to show your wife the stalker's texts just yet.

[Chocaholic]

I have no such experience but....the longer you avoid telling your wife, the guiltier you look when she eventually finds out. Tell her now.

[Clint Lando]

Tell him

[Seahawk]

I'll pile on the "you must tell your wife" advice.

Do it today.

[Steve Carlton]

It's crystal clear to me that your wife needs to be made aware. Not telling her could put doubt in her mind, even though your intentions might be good. What would you think if she was being pursued and didn't tell you? I don't know what the best advice is regarding telling her husband. You could warn her that you will if she continues, then it will be on her, but something tells me that won't motivate her. If you tell her husband, it would likely ruin their lives (which really are already ruined), but you might get blamed for it.

[GH85Carrera]

Originally Posted by wdfifteen

"Your texts are making me uncomfortable. I am 100% devoted to my wife and marriage. I will defend them in any way I have to. I am afraid your attention is a threat to my marriage and to the life I have worked so hard to create for us. Please stop."

This, only forget the please, use a stronger word that I can't type on the site. Block her number. Tell your wife.

[wayner]

I now have a firm rule for myself that as soon as there is a threat of any sort, I neutralize it.
Much like in the movie ransom, I go full mel gibson.


I can now never be blackmailed, coerced or emotionally co-opted in a situation of any sort.

My thinking is that if situations are going to blow up, I'll blow them up early.

-Property dispute raised by me, countered by neighbors wife claiming well then, your flagpole must be on my property...immediately dig up flagpole and ask "what else ya got"

-Now that I am single, a woman I was starting to date is unhappy that I was away on a four day motorcycle trip with no contact, when I return says WELL, i Guess you have different priorities!" YEs, I guess I do, goodbye.

-Friend of mine's wife who tries to use me as a pawn to beat down her husband while we are all out at a group table for dinner says " when are YOU taking me out" is met with me calling her out in front of the group for her terrible treatment of him, Do not implicate me in this.

(Many people covertly try to manipulate you into going alone g with things because your too nice to make a scene.

I'll make a scene every time now...just watch me.

SO, my advice, make a scene.
go to their house while the two of them are home and invite yourself in
or alternatively invite them out. Then when all three of you are cozy, call her on her bull**** in front of him, flash the phone, tell your buddy you are there for him isf he needs to talk, pay the bill and walk out.

DONE!

[flipper35]

Be careful Glen, using the F word with her might be taken as an invitation.

[GH85Carrera]

Originally Posted by flipper35

Be careful Glen, using the F word with her might be taken as an invitation.

I was thinking more of the C word, that is spelled much like aunt. Or the B word that is often used to describe female dogs used for breeding. Better yet, both words. From experience, most women HATE the c word, a lot.

[legion]

-Tell your wife exactly what is going on.
-Reply in her texts in Spanish you are a small dry-cleaning service and you have no idea what she is saying.
-Consider getting a new cell phone.
-Keep all texts. Print them out. Keep a log of when you see her and what she does (like driving by the shop at night). You will need this later. There's a good chance someone this crazy will accuse you of rape or something else when she realizes she isn't going to get what she wants.
-Set a deadline for the behavior to end (like two weeks). If it does not, call the police. Show them the texts and your log. Get a restraining order.

[fintstone]

You guys seem to have much more interesting lives than I do.

[Jim deCordova]

What ever else you do save those texts. Because as soon as her husband finds out, by what ever means she is going to say you started it.

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[flipper35]

When I read the title my first thought was this is another vash thread.