Getting old sucks

[stomachmonkey]

Originally Posted by red-beard

Step 1. Cologuard

Step 2. Colonoscopy

The nurse made a comment as the doctor signed me up for this crap.

"Now you know how we feel, every year!"

Getting old sucks...

Best 30 minutes of sleep I've ever had in my entire life.

Totally worth the hassle.

[911 Rod]

The worst part is time goes by faster the older you get. For me anyway.

[SiberianDVM]

I was in good health until I turned 65, then somehow I blew out 1 IVDisc in my neck and all 4 Lumbar discs. I went through 4 surgeries in the next 3 years before finally deciding to retire. This February 8 I had my 5th surgery and it was a doozy: laminectory and fusion on all the Lumbar discs, a 10 hour surgery and 5 days in the hospital. The pain has gradually reduced, but I still can't walk well.

Today was the first day I actually walked outside and worked on a car in almost 2 months.

[Tobra]

Originally Posted by 911 Rod

The worst part is time goes by faster the older you get. For me anyway.

Dad told me this when I was a kid and I was sure he was a liar. Another thing he was right about.

[Racerbvd]

Originally Posted by stomachmonkey

Best 30 minutes of sleep I've ever had in my entire life.

Totally worth the hassle.

Yep, very true. Had my doctor not insisted that I had it done in my 40s, polyps would have won.

[GH85Carrera]

One big change of age is as a 20 something to 30 something even and all nighter meant staying upp all night and stopping for breakfast then getting home after sun up.

Now it means sleeping all night and not having to get up to pee.

[jhynesrockmtn]

Originally Posted by kimlangley7

with the exception of my knees - I'm in fairly good shape for 71.. knees are shot though.. yeah - I know of knee replacement , but not a fan of the knife .. I'm currently getting the steriod/ lube shots in my knees and they help some.. but knees are still shot.. That's what 30 years Army - Airborne SF.. too much rucksack humping.. 1000+ parachute jumps.. too much abuse over the years..

My son is 7 years into this exact career path and some days I think he's got more aches/pains at 28 than I do. My aunt had the double knee surgery a few years back. The recovery sucks but she is so glad she did it. She's back to hiking, skiing, etc. You should think about it and meet with some folks who've gone through it. Thanks for your service seems trite but there you go. I appreciate the sacrifice as a parent with a son going through it. I've seen what it takes to have done what you did and am amazed. Cheers.

[GH85Carrera]

[red-beard]

Guys...I was mostly pissed off for having to poop in a bucket...

[masraum]

I once had someone tell me that toothless was the bomb, but I am not looking to test the theory.

Originally Posted by red-beard

Guys...I was mostly pissed off for having to poop in a bucket...

Wait, what?!?

I've known folks that had colonoscopies, but never heard of having to poop in a bucket. What The Sheisse?!?

[red-beard]

Originally Posted by masraum

Wait, what?!?

I've known folks that had colonoscopies, but never heard of having to poop in a bucket. What The Sheisse?!?

I present...Cologuard

[masraum]

Originally Posted by red-beard

I present...Cologuard

"collect your sample and send it to the lab"
"are you ready?"
"Its GO time!"

ROFLMAO!!

Look at it this way. It could have been worse. They could have given you that gallon of stuff to drink for the colonoscopy and then wanted you to put the resulting "movement" into the bucket.

Where they really missed out on that much too perky video was not having the actor that was the Smilin' Bob in the old Enzyte commercials.

[masraum]

LMAO. I'm still laughing, thanks Red!

[red-beard]

The indignity...for Mrs. Beard who had to deliver it to UPS...

[masraum]

Originally Posted by red-beard

The indignity...for Mrs. Beard who had to deliver it to UPS...

Could have been worse. They could have had huge letters on the outside announcing what it was. The box should have been decorated with:

[herr_oberst]

That's funny. Different labs must have different patents and procedures. I was given a kit that among other things had a popsicle stick and instructions on putting a small sample of a floater into a small bottle. (still humiliating, but a much smaller end result)

Are you sure your doctor wasn't just having a laugh?

[red-beard]

I feel bad for whoever receives that. Or imagine something at UPS breaking that box open!

[masraum]

Originally Posted by red-beard

I feel bad for whoever receives that. Or imagine something at UPS breaking that box open!

You should have had Taco Bell for lunch that day!

[Bill Douglas]

Or an excellent prank would be to leave the UPS marked box on your doorstep for the deliveries thief to steal.

[red-beard]

Originally Posted by Bill Douglas

Or an excellent prank would be to leave the UPS marked box on your doorstep for the deliveries thief to steal.

With a small tannerite charge...