Price of bacon in California fixing to spike in 4 months

[masraum]

Originally Posted by KC911

Beggin Strips! You'll never know it's not real bacon

The Sneeze - Half zine. Half blog. Half not good with fractions.

Beggin' Strips are bacon-shaped, bacon-flavored treats for dogs. In the commercial a dog runs around the house like a maniac shouting BACON, BACON, BACON, BACON, BACON! It's weird, because I do the exact same thing.

Beggin' Strips slogan is "Dogs don't know it's not bacon!" Newsflash: Dogs are retarded. Mine used to eat his own vomit, and wag his tail while he did it. I'll be the one to decide if this stuff tastes like bacon or not.

I know these snacks aren't made for human consumption, but while I was in the store the ingredients list looked pretty tame so I wasn't too concerned. Somehow I had missed one extremely dubious word sitting there all by itself. "MEAT". That's all it says... meat.

Meat is a pretty large umbrella. Beef is meat. Pork is meat. Horses, monkeys, and allegedly Arby's roast beef are meat. Even Rosie O'Donnell's ball sack is meat. Okay, maybe I've gone too far. I have no idea what that is they are serving at Arby's, but you get my point.

Alas, there is no turning back now. Despite the fact that I am a grown man with children, I'm off to go eat dog food. And what better way to have Beggin' Strips than in a Beggin', Lettuce, and Tomato Sammich!

I'm back. And I'm sad to report that I did not run around the house yelling "Bacon!" I did, however, run around the house yelling "Call 911!"

GodDAMN these are foul. Don't try this at home. I'm not sure it's safe, and I am sure your tongue may kill itself.

While they were a little too artificially colored red to pass for real bacon, I was pleased to see they were not all the same shape. Similar to slices of real bacon, they each have their own curvy and shriveled identity. (Just like my aunts and uncles.)

And somehow these Beggin' Strips also managed to smell just like bacon. Oopsie. Typo. I meant to say "the smoky puke of a thousand maniacs."

To put it simply, this is the devil's bacon. Even a healthy dose of bread, mayo, lettuce and tomato couldn't come close to masking the evil. The bitter nastiness literally got worse with every chew, and I was overcome by the urge to go in the backyard and eat grass until it was all out of me.

The following is a message to all dogs who read The Sneeze: First, sit. Sit! Good boy. Now listen to me. Beggin' Strips do NOT, I repeat, DO NOT TASTE LIKE BACON. You are all being played for chumps! Alright, now give me your paw. Okay, roll over! Good boy! Now go take a steamy dump in your master's shoe. Go on! Get!

In closing, the only silver lining to this dark dark cloud is I have figured out why so many dogs lick their own *******s. They are trying to kill the taste of Beggin' Strips. (By the way, it doesn't work.)

[Joe Bob]

Originally Posted by MBAtarga

It's not just bacon - it's any pork, it's chicken, and it's eggs.

Yes, but the chicken and egg producers are mostly in compliance. It's pork producers that have to get their act together. Last I checked only 4% will be able to "export" pork byproducts to Kommiefornia.

Kind of like their refineries.....they've screwed themselves.

[expatriot98]

Pork prices in CA will skyrocket.

People with money won't care and will pay whatever the cost while less affluent people can't.

Enterprising folks will drive to adjacent states and bring back illegal pork for black market.

Sounds all third worldy.

[GH85Carrera]

More pork BBQ for us! Cool.

Sweet Sour Pork is pretty good too.

The government can't keep heroin, crack and all the hundreds of other illegal drugs out of Cali. They will never stop the sale of pork or ham. The price will just go up.

[speeder]

Originally Posted by ckelly78z

The crazy vegans/PETA members in Kalifornia can't fathom eating a porkchop, and find it offensive....so they make laws to make it difficult for everyone else.

Rather than living, and let live, they must change the laws to suit their sickness, and keep from being offended.

Or maybe we like pork chops but just are not into corporate pork factories torturing the fk out of animals to make an extra couple million for the CEO each year. I know it doesn't matter to you as long as bacon doesn't cost a dollar more but some of us are animal lovers.

I'll gladly pay more for humane pork just like I pay more now for humane beef. Some of you losers would eat the ass hole of a cow that's been tortured as long as the price was right. This law makes me proud to live in California.

[Sooner or later]

Cali is too big a market to ignore. Producers will make required changes and jack up to price to all of us to cover the additional costs.

[stevej37]

[Tobra]

Originally Posted by Norm K

With the glaring exception of DC, I expect.

_

Good one Norm

Originally Posted by pavulon

How much bacon does a person need to eat every day, week or month for this to warrant an ounce of concern?

Funny you should ask. Bacon comes from a magical animal.






You can get bacon, pork chops, ribs, ham, all from the same magical animal.

You seem to have missed the part about chicken and eggs being impacted also.


This is effectively a regressive tax on protein. Who gets hit with regressive taxes the hardest? Poor people, f**k those poor people though, they can eat rice and beans.

Originally Posted by pavulon

new Inane Post of the Year (IPOTY) front-runner.

Relax, your title is safe.

[herr_oberst]

Originally Posted by Tobra

eat rice and beans.

I love Cuban food.

[pavulon]

Originally Posted by Tobra

Good one Norm

Funny you should ask. Bacon comes from a magical animal.






You can get bacon, pork chops, ribs, ham, all from the same magical animal.

You seem to have missed the part about chicken and eggs being impacted also.


This is effectively a regressive tax on protein. Who gets hit with regressive taxes the hardest? Poor people, f**k those poor people though, they can eat rice and beans.

Relax, your title is safe.

Meanwhile, Randy has competition for forum crybaby DH.

[Jeff Higgins]

[Jeff Higgins]

[cabmandone]

They're tryin to push me to plant based bacon! You can take my gas powered car.... but you can never take my bacoooooooooon!

[Jeff Higgins]

Understanding that pig sourced meat products (from pork to ham to hot dogs and more) are a real staple of the less well to do owing to the lower costs associated with farming pigs, one has to marvel as the selfish "hooray for me to hell with you" attitude of wealthier Californians. Their breakfast bacon is a luxury item that they are well able to afford, and any increase in cost is no more than a topic for side conversation over breakfast in some swank restaurant while they quaff $10 lattes. Those conversations will include, of course, no small measure of virtue signaling their concern for the plight of the less fortunate. They'll prattle on regarding BLM, "immigrants' rights", the homeless, single working mothers holding down two jobs, yada yada yada, never even making the connection as to how their "woke" new law just made it oh so much more difficult for these poorer families to feed themselves. They've once again shown their true colors - they care more about how "woke" they appear to their contemporaries than they care about these poor families, proudly proclaiming how "this law makes me proud to live in California".

[Joe Bob]

Fookkenthem....I got's 40 pounds in my deep freezer right next to Jimmy Hoffa..

[Norm K]

Originally Posted by cabmando

They're tryin to push me to plant based bacon!

Wait'll you melt some vegan cheese on it, Nick. You'll be a changed man!

_

[cabmandone]

Originally Posted by Norm K

Wait'll you melt some vegan cheese on it, Nick. You'll be a changed man!

_

Had vegan cheese pizza one time. Hellllllllllllllllllllll No.

[Por_sha911]

Between the regulations on pork and the jacked up minimum wage, a Bacon, Egg, and Cheese Biscuit at your local fast food place will soon cost $8-10 in Kalifornia. LOL
(disclosure for the trolls: yes I know that my numbers are inflated. Its to make a point.)

[pmax]

Good to see there's consensus on this.

[jyl]

Originally Posted by Sooner or later

Cali is too big a market to ignore. Producers will make required changes and jack up to price to all of us to cover the additional costs.

Yup.

Like it or not, diets are going to gradually have less meat and more veg/other. Meat animals are a really inefficient way to produce food, and the average American eats much more meat then they actually need. Of course, you and I eat and drink all kinds of stuff that we don’t need, and we may want to continue doing so. If you have enough money, no problem. That’s going to be a global thing, not just a USA thing.

It’s not oppression of the lower income. People don’t need giant quantities of bacon to be healthy, rather the opposite.

I find that I eat significantly less meat than I did even a few years ago. By choice. The only negative is that cooking vegetables well is different than cooking meat, and harder. I’ve had to elevate my cooking chops.

My daughter had to prepare all kinds of dietary meals for campers because, Berkeley families and their crazy dietary restrictions. It made her into a much better cook.