Dating over 60. Not sure I have a point, or just venting.

[cockerpunk]

so the normies are all in an uproar about the viral "places to not go a first date"

https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/nation/2023/10/30/list-of-where-not-to-go-on-a-first-date-viral/71382293007/

which i fully agree with. but thats also because i would never go to any of these places anyway.

[KNS]

Originally Posted by Capt. Carrera

As for venting? I invited him for dinner yesterday. In route he called to say he couldn't make it. His car's check engine light had come on. I was disappointed, but understanding. Okay, fine. If it was me, I would have ignored that stupid little light. In my world there's no problem unless I see smoke or smell antifreeze. But we can't all be daring like me. Some of us are lawyers, haha.

That's kind of crappy. If he was being sincere and wanted to see you again he'd say something like "I've got car problems and can't make it - when can we reschedule?"

However it's only been one day. If you don't hear back by tomorrow with him wanting to reschedule - move on.

[Steve Carlton]

Show up at his house with an OBDII scanner.

[flatbutt]

Originally Posted by Steve Carlton

Show up at his house with an OBDII scanner.

you kill me Steve.

[911 Rod]

Originally Posted by Steve Carlton

Show up at his house with an OBDII scanner.

Wearing something frilly.

[Steve Carlton]

And coke-bottle glasses.

[Dixie]

Originally Posted by 911 Rod

See the how to deal with liars thread.

Maybe there was something about you he did not find appealing. Works both ways.

I find this post particularly interesting. No, not the second part. Everyone's known that since the age of seven or eight.

It's the part about lying. See, I never said he's lying. I don't know if he is or not. But apparently a crazy little tweener girl lives in your head too. 😘

[Dixie]

Originally Posted by Steve Carlton

Show up at his house with an OBDII scanner.

Kitty Forman Debra Jo Rupp GIFfrom Kitty Forman GIFs

[Baz]

I know you are not asking/interested in my opinion here, Dixie.......but the guy "sounds" like a little wuss.

Pretty sure you can do better.

Just my 2 cents......

[Dixie]

Originally Posted by Baz

I know you are not asking/interested in my opinion here, Dixie.......but the guy "sounds" like a little wuss.

Pretty sure you can do better.

Just my 2 cents......

I appreciate everyone's input Baz, be it good, bad, or ugly. That said, supportive replies like yours are the best. Thanks

[Dixie]

Originally Posted by cockerpunk

so the normies are all in an uproar about the viral "places to not go a first date"
{Snip}

Admittedly unique to where I live, I've learned a "Beach date" means, "I'm broke and can't even afford to splurge for a picnic lunch," haha.

[scottmandue]

Originally Posted by KNS

That's kind of crappy. If he was being sincere and wanted to see you again he'd say something like "I've got car problems and can't make it - when can we reschedule?"

However it's only been one day. If you don't hear back by tomorrow with him wanting to reschedule - move on.

Seeing as I'm on a life reboot and without transport if I really want/need to be somewhere I just take a Lyft.
Just sayin...😋

[jhynesrockmtn]

[sc_rufctr]

Originally Posted by fastfredracing

My date left abrubptly after a few hours and a few drinks . The only thing I can think of is me saying " nice rack" . I am of course kidding .
I was polite and friendly . Conversation was kind of labored, but it was a noisy bar with a halloween party going on . Her idea .
She is kind of quiet and reserved. I thought I would not hear back from her again, but low and behold , she is texting today , wanting to get together again .
I had no idea what was going on with women 30 years ago, im even more lost now . Good luck to all of you navigating these waters. Luckily , I am totally cool being single for as long as needs be

It sounds like you could get lucky. Just go with it.

[sc_rufctr]

Originally Posted by cockerpunk

so the normies are all in an uproar about the viral "places to not go a first date"

https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/nation/2023/10/30/list-of-where-not-to-go-on-a-first-date-viral/71382293007/

which i fully agree with. but thats also because i would never go to any of these places anyway.

1. Cheesecake Factory
2. Applebee’s
3. Chili’s
4. Chipotle
5. Olive Garden
6. The Movies
7. Your House
8. Any Fast Food Chain
9. Buffalo Wild Wings
10. Wingstop
11. Red Lobster
12. A buffet
13. IHOP
14. Denny’s
15. The gym
16. Church
17. Starbucks
18. Coffee dates
19. Ice cream dates
20. Family functions
21. Movie night (Netflix, Hulu, and etc.)
22. Somewhere that requires a long drive
23. Bowling
24. Nightclubs
25. Hookah Bar
26. A bar for just drinks
27. Waffle House
28. Sports events

I generally agree. "A bar for just drinks" has worked well for me. "The Movies" for a first date sucks because you're not talking to each other.

"The gym" or "Church" for first date?

[john70t]

All that I know about dating is from alpha chad advice on the internet. "The good ones" on both sides are already taken and keeping their pies shut for safety lol. So no applicable advice here. But my thoughts:

1). Everyone is single for a reason at this point. Some for very good ones and histories of doing everything right. Some because they are murderous psychopath professional cons with mob debt who want to boost all their problems on you as soon as you let your guard down. "Nope. We've just met and I'm here to spend time together, not fly your niece back from a Caracas prison from last week." Childproof your home and don't accept 'mild curiosity'. Best thing is neutral ground for a while.

2). Go slow and neutral before warming things up and dabble easy without giving too much information away. It is the game the men should learn 'cause the gals are already pros. Gals love mystery and inspiration. That is what a complimentary long term relationship is for. It take two to tango and everyone must be willing to put skin in the game. Have a truthful cover story and don't go beyond that for a while. There are so many "What do you do for a living?" straight to "How much do you earn?" to "We should invest in real estate together with my five kids" type people on the dating scene.

3). Watch for warning signs and hints. Do they stare in the rear-view mirror too much? Flirt with the waiter? Treat people like crap? Argue on the phone? Give way too much attention with their existing crowd? You want a real person and everyone has flaws. Or does none of that happen, and they are just way too smooth at everything. Both can be indicative of true personality you weren't bargaining for.

4). What you see in the window isn't what is delivered in the mail. Someone can be a mean sum'itch at work and perfect on the ball, but during downtime they melt into uselessness or bad habits. There is a place and fit for everyone in life. Sometimes it works but often it doesn't. https://www.japannihon.com/why-do-japanese-say-you-have-3-faces/

5). Expect a s-test within the first five times together to test your worthiness. And be prepared to give them back. Take a road trip together for that $100 ice cream cone. The stressful situations both of you need to get through. That's where true personalities often come out.

6). Ignore all of the above. You've been on social media too much.

[stevej37]

I agree with most of the list...except the number 1....Cheesecake Factory.
It's a good quality restaurant with an expensive feel to it.

I'm almost sure that they have a chicken pot pie on the menu.
If she doesn't like that...take a hike.

[sc_rufctr]

That's really good advice John.

IME there are always lots of people looking who in reality are in no position to be looking.
They basically haven't taken enough time to deal with the past.

A while ago I met a lady "online". After a few really nice dates she invited me to her place for drinks. I arrived on time and she greeted me at her front door with a smile. She invited me in and the first thing I noticed were her wedding pictures still hanging on her wall. I didn't make a comment and I followed her into the living room and sat down. The place was messy and cluttered with moving boxes stacked and lined up on one wall of her living room. No big deal really but it was notable. After a few drinks and a bit later she said "Please excuse the mess but my ex husband moved out 2 weeks ago and some of his junk is still here" - We had been dating for about 4 weeks.

[Tobra]

Showing up wth the OBD scanner was the first thing popped into my head too. Does that make this the wrong crowd, or the right one?

Baz said the second thing

[GH85Carrera]

Originally Posted by Steve Carlton

Show up at his house with an OBDII scanner.

NO! Don't do it. Even if you figure out the problem, when he has a tail light go out next week it will be because you plugged in the scanner.

I made that mistake of working on a girlfriends car. From that day forward every random issue on her POS car was my fault.

I work on my two cars as they have a combined age of 75 years, and a combined mileage of 574,000 miles, and there is always something to tinker on or maintain.

I have done a couple of oil changes on my wife's Macan, but that is all it has needed from me.