How UPS Stole Christmas – My Missing SW Chip

[imcarthur]

My Tale:

I saw a post on Rennlist: “Anyone need a Steve Wong chip?”

A Rennlister had sold his ‘89 & had a SW chip left over. He was selling it for the bargain price of $200. It was tuned for a cat bypass & stock muffler. That just so happened to be the intended route for my ’87. I have thought about a chip. I have read the threads. All 500 of them. And I always thought that I some point I would pull the trigger. But it has always been . . . next year. This summer was a stereo & turbo tierods & surprise CV boots. The previous summer was surprise front tires & brake lines & a gaggle of other stuff. There’s always something. But $200 . . .

So I saw the post & I jumped. The cash was in a FedEx envelope heading south the next day. I studied the dyno charts on 911chips. I dreamed about the extra horsepower that would hurtle my car . . . well, hurtle might be a bit strong, but I was in Power Lust. I even waited 2 days to break it to my wife. I had to tell her that two weeks before Christmas – and we both had agreed to not buy anything for each other (or ourselves) – I had just spent $200 for a chip for the 911. To make the already “terrifying” (her exaggerated words) Porsche go even faster. Undaunted & being a professional salesman, I waited until just the right time & slipped it into the conversation during a commercial break in Brothers & Sisters or something. “Oh, by the way . . . “ And, I sold it! No resistance. I had hit the jackpot!

Then . . .

T’was the day before Christmas
When all through the house,
We were cleaning like banshees because 16 people are coming to Christmas dinner.

On the menu: A 4 rib beef roast & a big ass hunk of cheap ham that we cook “Hungarian” style. Boil & then bake. Succulent. And the rib roast . . . well, I’m a master. And I’m the cook, btw. I did Nanaimo bar (aka NY Special) yesterday & my stunning (all of my sister-in-laws are jealous) shortbread today. But I digress . . .

We returned home from our Christmas Eve errands: pick up 18 loaves of bread, drop off video rentals, buy cat litter. And lo & behold . . . wedged into the screen door . . . a bubble envelope! Could it be . . .

With the eager anticipation of a kid on Christmas morning, I dumped the crap I was carrying (the cat litter – no, it’s in a bucket so I didn’t really dump it, I just put the d*mn bucket down) on the kitchen table & reached for scissors to slice & dice the envelope. But it was feelin’ kind of thin . . .

Yes. The angels went silent. The elves were all dead. Christmas was on strike. The reindeer were all hamburger on some Laplander’s plate. The envelope contained nothing but the instructions for the installation of the chip. The envelope had been torn & taped somewhere along the way from Austin to Toronto. The chip was gone. Some Grinch had stolen Christmas from a 53 year old boy . . .

Ian

[red-beard]

bummer dude!

[imcarthur]

The evidence:



Note the rip at the top & the clear tape. The seller in Texas wrote: "There was a white envelope inside the brown envelope. Both of these envelopes are what the chip originally came shipped to me in. the Chip was in the white envelope inside a special black plastic container designed for the chip." Gone.

Ian

[Joeaksa]

Thats easy! Call UPS and claim the insurance on it. You DID get insurance for it I hope???

Believe that every package is insured for $100 min, so at least you get half your money back if it was not insured for the replacement cost.

Joe

[Fritz Peyerl]

That's why you never ever use UPS. The short version of UPS stands for

UNITED PROBLEM SERVICE

It is the biggest rip off courier service in the world. Just getting a parcel across the border means an extra mortgage on your house. all those fees and extra charges are insane.

Never have problems with USPS. It might be slower, but cheaper and less hassle.

I will not deal with a supplier if he does insist of shiping via UPS.
I canceled orders from Sto....d, because they wanted to ship with UPS.

[imcarthur]

Originally Posted by Joeaksa

Thats easy! Call UPS and claim the insurance on it. You DID get insurance for it I hope???

Believe that every package is insured for $100 min, so at least you get half your money back if it was not insured for the replacement cost.

Joe

Yes & no. Since it was crossing a border, I asked the seller to declare value @ $50. This saves 14% on the tax hit & saves UPS's border clearance charges which border on rape. I have under-declared dozens of times - especially if duty is involved too. I emailed UPS to file a damage report about the theft & I will see what their response is.

If I had thought it through, I should have insisted on USPS.

I guess I'll be chipless for another year.

Ian

[Porsche-O-Phile]

Sorry to hear of your troubles. I went through something similar with a person on here from whom I bought a 911 turbo tail. Sent via DHL. They LOST IT. How exactly one loses a turbo tail for a 911 (they're not exactly small) I don't know, but they lost it. Major bummer. Good news is the guy is refunding me and will be able to take it up with DHL.

Personally I think someone in DHL's employ took the liberty of a "five finger discount" and it's probably sold on ebay or craigslist by now. So I can relate. It bites.

[Joeaksa]

Ian,

I may be mistaken but a "declared value" and insured value are not the same. One is for customs and the other is for insurance.

I would still try to get at least $100 back.

Would a chip for a 85 model DME unit work in your car? Since we are in the holiday mood this week, I might have an extra lying around the house that I do not need.

[imcarthur]

"AN INCORRECT ROUTING AT A UPS FACILITY CAUSED THIS DELAY / THE PACKAGE WAS MISSORTED AT THE HUB. IT HAS BEEN REROUTED TO THE CORRECT DESTINATION SITE"

Looks like the thief was in Mesquite.

I'll have to see what insurance (if any) the seller put on it. My docs don't show it. I am pissed & UPS will pay.

Ian

[imcarthur]

And Joe . . .

Thanks for the kind offer but 85s were 28 pin chips.

Ian

[Oh Haha]

I have to ask:
What in the heck would someone do with a chip for a specific setup for a 911? How would they know what was in the package? No offense to the seller but was the chip in the package to begin with?

Who has a 911 at the UPS in Mesquite? Bastard!!!!

[john70t]

There is employee theft, but a lot of UPS losses are from their outdated and worn-out engineering:
-big boxes under 150lbs and smaller envelopes are processed together,
-6ft wide belts feed into 4ft wide belts with everything crushing together,
-broken equipment that never gets fixed,
-hiring temporary help from the gutters to break union-mentality moral, etc...

They netted 4 billion one year but our building never saw a dime in equipment.
The MO is push the employee to the limits (regardless of package-handling) and never spend a dime on equipment unless it is absolutely necessary. That is probably why your chip is missing.

[WolfeMacleod]

Originally Posted by Fritz Peyerl

That's why you never ever use UPS. The short version of UPS stands for

UNITED PROBLEM SERVICE

Never have problems with USPS. It might be slower, but cheaper and less hassle.

We call them United Parcel Smashers in the music industry.

+1 for USPS. Thousands of packages shipped, not a single one damaged, ever, and only one loss in the last seven years or so.

UPS on the other hand...I get packages all the time...boxes mashed to bits on 90%