Need an outsiders opinion on something...

[pwd72s]

Vinny...there is no precedence for this?

I tend to go with those saying the service is really for those left behind.

[nostatic]

At the risk of getting parfy, I think that judgement is likely best left to someone else.

If he served his profession honorably then he deserves the standard. Any actions are essentially being directed at the family, not at him (he's gone). Would any of the guys who don't want to do it be comfortable with walking up to one of his kids and telling them to their face that their dad was dishonorable?

[Targa Me]

Originally Posted by VINMAN

The issues really isnt the firefighters service. The main issue is with the honor guard. A lot of the guys are against it, because they feel he selfishly destroyed his childrens lives. Which is not an "honorable thing to do.

He obvisouly had serious mental issues and problems he felt he couldn't cope with.
I say full service with honors for his family. I'm certain, in the past, he has put his life on the line for others during his service, so an honor guard is due.

My prayers go out to his wife and kids.

[Jim Bremner]

Ask his surviving kin what THEY want.


By the way, I'm torn. I do feel that I deserve the "right" to check out when I want. As a follower of Christ, I know it's wrong.

Yes, he F'up Christmas for his kids...ut maybe there were worse things in the mans heart. He didn't take anyone else out with him.

[cstreit]

Yes. Hell, as long as we're postulating, it could be the stress of the job and time away from home that caused it... If anything, do it for his family.

[masraum]

Absolutely. People that resort to that solution are not thinking rationally. To get to that point the despair and depression that someone must feel would over power any rational thought.

[syncroid]

Sorry to hear this news Vinny. I think the first two posts sum it up pretty clear. I feel for those left behind.

[Seahawk]

It is a time of need.

[DanielDudley]

I'll pray for him and his family. I do not know what protocol is about the funeral, but being a Firefighter can be a tough row to hoe.

[Rapewta]

Full service with honors with his family present.
How do you do this with a wife and children? I don't know the answer but being mentally unstable is very complicated.

[Racerbvd]

Originally Posted by azasadny

Yes, the family deserves it. They didn't choose the way he would die...

Do it for the family, Honor them..

[Groesbeck Hurricane]

IMHO right now it is about healing the family as well as the station.

[Oh Haha]

Man, that's just so sad. I'm sorry for you and the man's family. I' ve been through this with relatives, like others here and it's just so tough for us to understand.

My humble opinion is that he earned the full tilt funeral for putting his life on the line for the community.

Send him out honorably as "brothers". How he died does not diminish what he did while here.

[VINMAN]

Thanks for the replies guys. Much appreciated and also along my line of thinking.
Unfortunately we have no dept protocal for this, as this is a first for us.

The guy showed no signs at al,l other than the fact that he has been going through a very nasty divorce. A bunch of the guys were hangin out with him only a few hours beforehand. He was having a good time. Never would have expected it.

[sammyg2]

No. He did not die in the line of duty.
What he did was not honorable and deserves no honor.
To do otherwise would be dishonest and hypocritical IMO.

[VINMAN]

Sammy, you hit on what the sentiment is of most guys ive talked to feel. Why should someone who takes that way out, be afforded the same honors as someone who dies heroicaly, or in a non "self inflicted " way?

[mossguy]

Dying in the line of duty is in itself a self-inflicted death, even if it was not intended to be that way.

[Oh Haha]

I agree on suicide not being honorable, at the very least...It's the coward's way out.

Honoring his service to the community and not how he died is the way I see it. As others have said, do it for his family.

[nostatic]

Originally Posted by VINMAN

Sammy, you hit on what the sentiment is of most guys ive talked to feel. Why should someone who takes that way out, be afforded the same honors as someone who dies heroicaly, or in a non "self inflicted " way?

Are you honoring his death or his life?

Seems to me that funerals and memorial services focus on the life of the person. Sometimes the circumstances of the death are not even mentioned. If he died "doing something he loved" would it be any more or less tragic for the family left behind?

"Judge not, lest ye be judged."

[LWJ]

Yes. Suicide is the worst. The survivors need all the help they can get.
Larry