admit to your stupidity

[Allen_70S]

For the younger guys, a Chevy LUV is a Light Utility Vehicle (aka a small pickup truck).

This is a great thread. If the Darwin theory were 100% efficient many of us would not be here to tell the stories. Here’s mine. Years ago the driver’s side inside door handle linkage of my ’61 T-Bird convertible (a very large/heavy door) was sticky and I usually had to push the handle forward to assure that the door was latched. On one occasion I neglected to push the handle forward. The driver’s side window was down, and fortunately I remembered to latch my seat belt. About a half mile from the house there is a tight right turn, which I took at about 30 MPH. As soon as the door started to swing out I instinctively grabbed the top of the door with my left hand. Without the seat belt restraining me, I would have been pulled from the car, bouncing along the pavement, into oncoming traffic.

[SpyderMike]

This is easy...16 years old. Parents gave my brothers and I a hand me down car - Toyota Corona MKIII. It had a manual transmission. Smart ass me gets in the drivers seat with legs crossed and starts engine. My normal clutch foot (now on the accelerator) is to the floor. My normal accelerator foot (now on the clutch), after pumping the carb, is in enough to engage the light clutch. The engine lights off and starts screaming past redline. I instictively keep my clutch foot buried (still on the accelerator), and quickly pull my normal accelerator foot of the pedal which dumps the clutch at redline or beyond. The engine let's go and needs to be replaced. Duh.

[3rd_gear_Ted]

Completed 1.5 yr. long 3.6 conversion on my SC, everything seems OK. Go to first track event for a shake down, pull away from tech inspection and clutch goes to floor with a broken clutch arm finger. Winch back onto to trailer with tail between legs and go home muttering to me, myself and I. In the end I, blamed it on Me & Myself, I never takes the blame.

[bigel]

I recently installed the cross shaft in mating up the transmission and engine, in an attempt to wrap up my engine teardown / reinstall...I had fitted up the transmission to make sure the spline lined up and meshed with the clutch assembly.

Rather than pull them back apart completely I decided I would 'fish' the inner needle bearing through the access opening at the top of the bell housing. To do so, I figured I would use my trusty probe magnet that I use to collect screws, bolts, etc. dropped into tight spaces...well, all was well until the bearing touched the large steel bolt I was using to guide the bear into place on the ear of the bell housing...because then, all of the needles decided to exit the bearing 'cup' while lining up with the magnetic field lines induced between the magnet and the bolt I was using to steady the bearing. I didn't take a photo of the bearing, but it looked sort of like the image below.



Spent the next several minutes re-lining the bearing...thankfully didn't loose any of the needles in the bell housing.

[JohnJL]

Got married.

I should clarify...got married to tina. Barbara is a relative saint.

[dicklague]

Originally Posted by BennyBroadcast

I owned a fairly rough SAAB 900 Turbo. When I bougt it, I had no idea that it was front wheel drive! I took a friend out for a blast in it and he told me, I thought it was RWD up until then, DUH. The car really went nicely however and I had a lot of fun with it. One day I go to pick up my new GF and on the way to the resteraunt she says "Whats that bumping noise?" I shrug. Next day it got really bad on the way to work. Only ONE nut left on the front right hand wheel AAAK!

Some months later I decide to back the car up the steep driveway at my house so that i can do an oil change. With the steering on full lock to swing the tail up the driveway,BANG! and the car no longer has drive. A quick check around the front shows the drivers side lower wishbone snapped at the root. CV joint is parted and so myself and two others put a trolley jack under it and push it into the garage.

Back on the road some time later and I notice that the wastegate seems to have stopped working. I know this by the fact that the boost gauge is going much higher than ever. I pick up my friend and give him a demo. I really let it wind out. The car accelerates like an ICBM as the needle on the boost gauge whips around the face and pins on the stop. WOW! but I ease off as the gearbox makes a complaining moan.

As I do this demo, the car is in the classifieds and as with all the other times I had tried to sell it, the response is weak. However I get one guy on the hook nad he comes over to take it for a drive. Car behaves, I explain wastegate issue. Guy comes back after leaving deposit to get a PPI. When he returns the car he informs me that it is not engaging second or third gears. "Maybe it's just an adjustment" he says. Hmmmm maybe not. I visit my wrench. "The gearbox bearings have collapsed" he says "a grand for labour, extra for parts" I call buyer "Listen you can have a the car for a grand less than we agreed if you still take it" "OK" he replies. I can't believe my luck. By the time I get it home it has lost all forward gears, only reverse still works. I call buyer "Mate, you'll have to get a car trailer and back the thing on when you come to get it" "OK" he says. He duly arrives a day later and we load up the SAAB. He pays me. The rig eases off down the street and when it was out of sight.............I did a little dance in the middle of the road.

I have owned 5 900 turbos, and currently own a few 9-5 Aeros....yeah I am a Saab nut. Your post is most disturbing.....I know it was a long time ago....that car is very collectible now. That is a great car too bad you did not appreciate it......well this is a thread for doing stupid things.

[bigel]

While reassembling my 3.2 I managed to forget installation of the oil pipe that runs from the block, between the block and the exhaust manifold...which had already been installed weeks ago. Needless to say I was kicking myself while removing the left manifold along with the air distributor tube.

I don't know what others experience is with that pesky air distributor tube, but I find it to be a real pain in the balls. That said, I finally got it back installed.

If the oil connection leaks onto the heat exchanger, I'll be real pissed...

[Otter74]

A few weeks ago I smashed a loaded engine hoist into my big toes (no bueno!) Posted about that in a shop-safety-reminder thread.

When I was in college I used a ramset without hearing protection. Hello, tinnitus!

[Cook&Dunning]

I just read a post here on Pelican and learned something new - again. Although I had successfully replaced my brake calipers with new Porsche Classics, replaced rotors, pads, and then did an awesome brake fluid change - I did not even think about replacing clutch fluid - shared with brakes. Call me Alexander Dumbass. Now need to bleed the clutch. Thanks Pelican for the education!

[boosted79]

-on the first engine I "rebuilt", a 1963 Ford Comet with a mighty 200 six, I threw out the oil ring expanders because I thought it was too hard to get the rings into the cylinders. There wasn't a mosquito within five miles of that car after that.
- bought a drive chain for my first Honda 750 from my buddy's father's John Deere dealership and saved $15 I think. The chain broke and got jammed between the sprocket and the case and punched a hole in the case. I did tear it down myself though and got it back together ok.

If you've never done anything stupid, you've never done anything...

[gazzerr]

Tried to snip off the end of the vacuum hose on the dizzy retard so it had a better seal on the nipple. Snipped off a big chunk of my finger instead. 5 stitches and a tetanus shot later all fixed!

[930cabman]

Originally Posted by boosted79

-on the first engine I "rebuilt", a 1963 Ford Comet with a mighty 200 six, I threw out the oil ring expanders because I thought it was too hard to get the rings into the cylinders. There wasn't a mosquito within five miles of that car after that.
- bought a drive chain for my first Honda 750 from my buddy's father's John Deere dealership and saved $15 I think. The chain broke and got jammed between the sprocket and the case and punched a hole in the case. I did tear it down myself though and got it back together ok.

If you've never done anything stupid, you've never done anything...

Thanks for the laughs, it's a miracle we survive this madness called being a guy

[Steam Driver]

One fantastic thread.

Back in the seventies, when I was using my 914-6 (gone now, since 1989) as my daily driver I began having some carburetion issues. Exploring things some, I found some large rust particles in the emulsion tube wells of one of the Webers (or maybe both of them). Now I was no stranger to working on Webers, but I didn't relish R&R-ing the carbs to get the rust out as that would require re-synching, etc. So I had a bright idea.

I had an old Sear's canister vacuum I used in the garage. Why not make a small nozzle for it and suck the rust out? So that's what I did. Except that as I was doing so I kept hearing a muffled "whoomp" behind me and eventually the suction stopped. When I looked around the canister (which was built like a plastic clamshell) was laying open!

I think what happened was that gasoline fumes were accumulating in the canister as it sucked them in along with the rust particles, and when an appropriate mixture was achieved - boom - the sparks from the motor (which was in the canister) ignited them. There was no latch on the housing; it depended only on negative pressure to keep it closed. I had actually considered this possibility and drained the float bowls prior to using the vacuum, but apparently there was enough residual to cause the issue.

There seemed to be no real harm done; mostly just amusing. I suspect that might have been different had there been a mechanical latch on the canister. And it worked - cleaning out the wells cured the carburetion issues.

So, where did the rust come from? Turned out it was from the gasket grooves in the buckets mating the carbs to the factory air cleaner housing.

[boosted79]

There's a lot more...

-I saved a lot of money by pulling a rear pumpkin at a scrap yard for a '63 Chevy Biscayne I had instead of doing the right thing and rebuilding the original. It let go and locked up at 75 on the interstate causing all sorts of fun. Called a wrecker and sold the whole car to him for $125 on the spot and took a bus home. But I kept the relatively new recaps, had to go get them later. That was a nice car too, 283 with three on the tree with OD.

-then there's the time I backed into my GF's C-class with my pickup, guess who won. Two large later she was talking to me again.

[wayner]

I heard a noise in my engine so I decided to rebuild it to 10.5:1 and twin plug.

Next time I'm getting ear plugs

[poorsha]

Sold the 911.
Bought another.
Sold the 911.
Bought another.
Sold the 911.
Bought another.
Sold the 911.
Bought another.
Sold the 911.
SOLD THE 911
Yep, I SOLD it.
Duh

[vascott01]

For many years I was changing the oil on my 930 which does not have a sump plate on the bottom. I was just changing the oil at the oil tank. Did not realize until engine rebuild that there was a bolt on the side close to the bottom that would release the oil from the engine..


Who would have figured that these cars have two places to drain after all the cars I had had and you only drain from one place. Plus I always wondered why my oil was so dark after 3-5k...Just figured OK like most of my cars the oil gets dark after so many miles..


Always do a basic research prior to doing something and do not take everyone's word as God...Amazing after just 20 minutes you can weed out the BS and find that nugget of true info..Not all cars are the same

Cheers...

[bugstrider]

Lost money out of my 911 funds.... It all starts with- " This one time.."

Recently did a test pull on a buddies 60# cam-bow. What could possibly go amiss?

Red flag #1: didn't use the wrist trigger apparatus.
Red flag #2: thought my vise like Kung-Fu grip could sefice...
Red flag #3: I was lacking my "stupid moron" thinking cap

Resultant: when letting down the draw, it went like clockwork up until the cams caught and did what they are suppose to do. Ripped the string right out of my "Kung-fu" grip like a fat kid snatching a cupcake from the chow line at summer camp. Essentially a partial dry fire. So class, at the tune of $430.00 in two new cams, limbs, strings, misc parts, labor and dialing in.... I have officially submitted my name in for the coveted D.S.M. Award.

(Dumb S%#t Maneuver Award)

But the biggest insult to injury is the fact that the money came out of my 911 funds. Does this count?


Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk

[fizeus]

Here is my cent to my stupidity

Looking at my Maintenance Logbook i saw it was time to do a gear oil change on my 911.
So I removed the fill plug then moved to the drain plug ... hey this bolt seems stuck ... maybe I need some more force ... dammit it's really stuck !!
Ok... so I decided to get the car off the jack stands to be free to use the posterior wheel as a lever from my arm and my chest... so i started to pull with all the force in my arm until .... i heard a "crack" coming from my chest...

While going to the hospital for a rib fracture i realized i should have applied pushing force to unscrew and not pulling force. :-)

[bigel]

So I'm in the process of removing my fuel lines after a failure on the first startup after disassembly...no, not rebuilding the fuel lines when the engine was out of the car isn't the stupidity of this story (debatable).

So in the process of fishing out the fuel lines I utilized lots of tools, muscle and my trusty mini-mag flashlight. This is where the stupidity comes in...so I lay that sucker on top of the alternator fan/shroud and...clink...dink...I knock it down into the engine compartment. But now I can't find the darn thing...wait a minute, you don't think...oh no!



If it's not clear what you're looking at in the photo above, I'll tell you...you're looking down the opening of the fresh air distributor tube; the nice shiny stainless steel tube that connects to the heat exchangers and runs up through the engine tin into the engine compartment. Yes, a perfect shot down the 8" length of the tube...and my exhaust is just installed and torqued to spec.

Well there is no way I am disassembling the muffler/cat and pulling the air distributor tube to get my flashlight back. Maybe I'll just leave it in there...what's the worst that could happen...no! I need to fish that thing out of there!

So I try a wad of duct tape fastened to the end of a long screwdriver...no dice, not sticky enough!

So then I try to fish it out with two long screwdrivers, a la chopstick style...no dice, not dexterous enough!

Now I am loosing it...I give up for the night and figure I'll sleep on it.

Next morning it hits me...shop vac!

But it's not going to be that easy. The flashlight is weighty for its footprint and, oh by the way, I managed to knock the little bugger laterally towards the passenger side and out of sight.

I hit it with the shop vac...try to fish the vacuum hose towards the flashlight's new hiding place...no dice, not enough suction! I'll need to get it back to where I can see the sucker!

So I jack the passenger side way up to the extent of the factory jack and start 'encouraging' the entrapped foreign object using a rubber mallet on the underside of the tube.

Finally, something is going my way...I can once again see the flashlight at the bottom of the tube. I now stick the cone-shaped nozzle of the shop vac down and can feel resistance in the vacuum.



However, as I gently pull it up with my prize, it falls back down...narrow cylindrical objects that are fairly heavy for their size don't cooperate with this short of game.

I won't be defeated, next I use a piece of 14 gauge wire fashioned with a loop on one end and am finally able to stand the flashlight up so that the face of the light is facing upwards...I then go at it with the shop vac cone attachment once more and FINALLY, the flashlight holds firm and I'm able to remove it from its metallic tomb!

What a waste of 2 hours of my life...from now on, rags in all exposed openings...not just those sensitive ones on the engine!

Bad flashlight!