need advice guys...(long) - Page 2

ronin · 09-27-2005, 08:04 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by slakjaw
your right cool chick not ALL woman play head games. Only 99.99997% of them do. Another thing that he better get used to.

they all do. some just don't realize it

BRPORSCHE · 09-27-2005, 08:09 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by ronin
not with you anyway

Ouch ronin, that was harsh!

Well i guess the OT board has made up there minds. And now I have to see what I am going to tell her tonight. Thank god we don't go to school with each other...
thanks for the help guys!

vash · vash's Garage

i promise, when you are in you latter years of college hanging out with a bunch of hot young women that are more secure with who they are, and what they want, you will not even remember this girls name. you'll probably forget you are catholic too

legion · 09-27-2005, 08:21 AM

I had a very similar situation in high school.

Run.

Do not pass go.

Do not collect $200.

If you stay will her, the mind games will:

1) Get worse.

OR

2) Get worse.

I wasted two years of my life trying to "fix" a relationship like this. When I could have been single and much happier or dating other girls and much happier. Her goal is to turn you in to her lap dog. She wants to see how much she can get you to beg; how much she can control you.

I did learn some valuable life lessons from that experience:

1) Run from psycho chicks.

2) Ultimately, one person is in control of a relationship. It can operate as a partnership most of the time, but when the $h!t hits the fan, there needs to be someone willing to take charge. That person needs to be me.

3) There are better women out there, you don't need to hang on to what you've got now. In the words of a very wise man: "There is a time and a place for everything. That time is college."

Mule · 09-27-2005, 08:23 AM

Remember, women give sex to get love. Men give love to get sex. Not many people your age know this. Use it to your advantage.

BRPORSCHE · 09-27-2005, 08:27 AM

thanks for the tip mule! Also how many guys would of stayed around for three months like I did knowing that she might not go back out with me. And still I bought her expensive presents. Jesus looking back on it now i am very crazy. How do i get out though? Break up with her tonight, and just walk away and not come back?

Groesbeck Hurricane · 09-27-2005, 08:33 AM

Expensive presents: BAD
Nice flowers, little things: GOOD

Don't spend tons of money on her. You're young, live and enjoy life. Keep it at friends with some benefits, you might be the whole thing and not have to be a permanent fixture. I operated that way for years when younger. You'll get more of an eyeful of her as her friend than her "steady" (do they still use that term?)

slakjaw · 09-27-2005, 08:38 AM

nah haven't had sex...we are both catholic...and she is very, very catholic...so yeah no sex.

Quote:

Originally posted by ronin
not with you anyway

DITTO THAT

BRPORSCHE · 09-27-2005, 08:41 AM

Ok guys, well I need to go to Physics I will be back in about an hour and a half...don't try to thrash me to badly!

09-27-2005, 08:50 AM

Pay someone to give her herpes.

mikester · 09-27-2005, 09:06 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by BRPORSCHE
thanks for the tip mule! Also how many guys would of stayed around for three months like I did knowing that she might not go back out with me. And still I bought her expensive presents. Jesus looking back on it now i am very crazy. How do i get out though? Break up with her tonight, and just walk away and not come back?

Just the stupid ones - which in reality is probably most of us at your age.

Run man; You'll be better for it. Cut it short and get used to cutting it short with girls who do not give you what you want (not really referring to sex there).

Not all girls play head games but at your age you can bet they all are doing it to some extent but not necessarily on purpose. They are just like you, immature and stupid. So - since you're asking you obviously recognize something about it isn't right. Which means you've evolved past it. Most guys fight this evolution and remain stupid and chase girls who have already decided they aren't going to give it up. So move on man; she's already decided.

I'm a firm believe that guys and girls can very rarely just be friends - especially after romantic entanglements.

I can count my female friends I think on one hand. Most of those are my wife's friends who are around alot. Friends I have who are female who were friends of mine before I met my wife are two. One who is just a friend and one who is an old flame of sorts.

Now my wife is closer to these girls than I am but they were my friends first. I remember a lot of girls saying "Let's just be friends."

Uh; what exactly is the point of that?

I know CoolChick is going to take issue but I'm prepared for that. There are exceptions but for the most part - I just don't see the point to it.

RANDY P · RANDY P's Garage

when she calls, treat her like one the homies - like a dude you just met but barely know.

"hey what up dood?" that sort of thing.

Then bring other chicks around.... Be pleasant the whole time.
Spend on everyone but her..

rjp

cool_chick · 09-27-2005, 09:09 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by ronin
they all do. some just don't realize it

Well if all women do, I'm not sure what you mean by "headgames", then I can certainly attest to the fact that all men play games too.

I've had my share of male crap.

Guess all humans play headgames, huh?

vash · vash's Garage

oh, that ipod money should have gone to your 911. hell, it would be better spent going to MY 911.

reminds me of my favorite CHEERS line:

(first name?) malone, "women"
woody, "hey that reminds me of what my uncle used to say!"
malone, "yeah woody? what was that?"
woody, "women"

Moses · 09-27-2005, 09:12 AM

situation:
Me and this girl dated for 9 months. She broke up with me the day before our 9 month. Started seeing another guy the very next day. Was kind of cheating, but not really. He is a senior so he decides that he doesn't want to start anything serious before he goes off to college. She calls me up 5 days later. Can we go out? We start going out, (First mistake, and a big one) break up after a few days on the july, 4. (You should be starting to get the message here. )

About a month later me and her start to become very good friends again, (Your "idiot light" should have been flashing at this point. ) and are very much so considered friends with benefits by this point. She starts talking to another guy, this guy is the shiznit...fast car ('98 supra TT), brand new Z-71, money coming out of his a$$, and he races dirtbikes. Ultimate chick magnet. They start dating and I totally disappear. (Personally, I'm shocked. Just shocked.) I leave the state for a few days, I come home and she calls me crying. I told her that now it was fair, and we got in a big fight, which ended up by me asking her out. (Brilliant! I never would have thought of that!)"No."

Since then we have been talking every night, and are now very much so friends with benefits. I went out and bought her a IPOD mini and she absolutely loved it.( It's generally easier to buy sex that affection, but you're young so I'll give you a pass.) I slept over her house when rita came ashore. That is about all I can say about that night....

Today it was 3 months exactly since we broke up. And it would of been our 1 year.( Awww, your anniversary!) the varsity football game was pushed back to tonight because of the hurricane. I had a decision to make, LSU game or h/s game. I chose the h/s game and she didn't know it. During her half time routine i left a simple daisy on her bag, along with the ipod. (You should strap a Timex to your head)She immediatley knew it was me and started looking for me. Tonight I asked her out...again.( It takes a lickin' and keeps on tickin'.) But tonight I got. "Yes." But now i don't know what to do. I know things are goign to be different. ( I'm pretty sure it'll work out this time, champ.)

thanks for the advice in advance guys, I just have been through so much crap I just don't know what to do.

slakjaw · 09-27-2005, 09:12 AM

I would like to say that Cool Chick is not one to play head games. SO, Not ALL girls do it. I am sure you will run into someone that will treat ya right. Thats why I say ditch this one man!!!!

RANDY P · RANDY P's Garage

The fastest way to recover from a woman is another woman...

Work on that...

rjp

RANDY P · RANDY P's Garage

Quote:

Originally posted by cool_chick
Well if all women do, I'm not sure what you mean by "headgames"

And we're off!!!!

BlueSkyJaunte · 09-27-2005, 09:51 AM

Dude. Dump her. Get over it.

Find something with big hooters and hit it.

cool_chick · 09-27-2005, 09:54 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by mikester
Just the stupid ones - which in reality is probably most of us at your age.

Run man; You'll be better for it. Cut it short and get used to cutting it short with girls who do not give you what you want (not really referring to sex there).

Not all girls play head games but at your age you can bet they all are doing it to some extent but not necessarily on purpose. They are just like you, immature and stupid. So - since you're asking you obviously recognize something about it isn't right. Which means you've evolved past it. Most guys fight this evolution and remain stupid and chase girls who have already decided they aren't going to give it up. So move on man; she's already decided.

I'm a firm believe that guys and girls can very rarely just be friends - especially after romantic entanglements.

I can count my female friends I think on one hand. Most of those are my wife's friends who are around alot. Friends I have who are female who were friends of mine before I met my wife are two. One who is just a friend and one who is an old flame of sorts.

Now my wife is closer to these girls than I am but they were my friends first. I remember a lot of girls saying "Let's just be friends."

Uh; what exactly is the point of that?

I know CoolChick is going to take issue but I'm prepared for that. There are exceptions but for the most part - I just don't see the point to it.

I agree about young girls. They have no clue as to what they want.

I don't take issue as it's your life, your business, if you feel that way, then that's your gain or loss. To me, I see it as a loss.

My life: I lived with a guy 2 1/2 years, before he broke up with me. I met my husband, and my ex boyfriend was at our wedding. Those two became rather close. My ex-husband met a girl 4 months after we broke up, she's awesome. I am the one who ended it and was grateful that she helped him to get through it. To this day we're friends. A month ago (get this LOL) I attended a birthday party at HER mother's house. Actually, her mother was rather welcoming to me.

After my ex-husband, I dated a guy for two months....he was such a jerk to date, but was soooo cool to hang out. I remember thinking, omg this guy would be a great friend but sure is sucky to date. Needless to say, guess what, we're friends today. We go out about every third weekend or so, and mosttimes his girlfriend joins us. She's the one who's telling him to call me....LOL

Moral of the story? To me, it's difficult to say I love someone (or really care for them) then to turn around and say I now hate them. This means to me that I must've never cared about them in the first place. I'm just not like that. The reward is having that wonderful friend in my life and seeing them happy with their new girls (well the ex-husband, it's been about 3 years for those two now so I guess that's not so new anymore).

That's the point to me. Wonderful people who care for me and I care for them.