Scientology Rocks!

[Sapporo Guy]

They probably donate to charities and churches so they don't pay taxes.
*assumption of course

Joke? No, I do believe that some people really do believe in Xenu and becoming a better Thetan!

* list of questions
Are they out of order?
It seems that there is a pattern in there. 2-3 questions that nail you for being a thetan then the next is to nail you for being in allegiance with Xenu.

When I pee, I see a yellow glow .... hmmmm .... am I in trouble ???

[legion]

Originally Posted by Sapporo Guy

* list of questions
Are they out of order?
It seems that there is a pattern in there. 2-3 questions that nail you for being a thetan then the next is to nail you for being in allegiance with Xenu.

I think part of it is that they can use the e-meter to contradict what you actually say and "prove" that you have thetans.

[Porsche-O-Phile]

So if I had sex with L. Ron Hubbard's dead body, does that make my inner Thetan especially cool?

[Sapporo Guy]

lolo, I just thought it was a way to get you to admit to things
And then add in the thetan for some good measure.

[9elf]

Let's start our own religion - Porscheotology.

I believe anything the good Dr said.

Porsche Engineers are mythical.

I have willingly given many hard earned dollars to the cause.

Every day I think about how I can bring even more 911 speed into my life.

If it came out that 911 engines were forged from 75 million years old volcano's, I wouldn't be surprised.

[Sapporo Guy]

Who's the great leader?

[Hugh R]

Seriously, make it a religion and we can all deduct "donations" to our church. Imagine how much we could write off! We'll make Wayne our Christ! He'll be the next thing after whats-his-name in Texas. The Branch Dividian nut.

[Jeff Higgins]

I don't think I would like it if the FBI shot Wayne.

[imcarthur]

"In 1967, L. Ron Hubbard further distanced himself from the controversy attached to Scientology by resigning as executive director of the church and appointing himself "Commodore" of a small fleet of Scientologist-crewed ships that spent the next eight years cruising the Mediterranean Sea. Here, Hubbard formed the religious order known as the "Sea Organization" or "Sea Org," with titles and uniforms. The Sea Org subsequently became the management group within Hubbard's Scientology empire.

He was attended by "Commodore's Messengers," teenage girls dressed in white hot pants who waited on him hand and foot, bathing and dressing him and even catching the ash from his cigarettes. He had frequent screaming tantrums and instituted brutal punishments such as incarceration in the ship's filthy chain-locker for days or weeks at a time and "overboarding," in which errant crew members were blindfolded, bound and thrown overboard, dropping up to 40 ft. into the cold sea, hoping not to hit the side of the ship with its sharp barnacles on the way down. Some of these punishments, such as imprisonment in the chain-locker, were applied to children as well as to adults."

from Wiki

[1fastredsc]

Originally Posted by 9elf

If it came out that 911 engines were forged from 75 million years old volcano's, I wouldn't be surprised.

So volcano's leak too?

[CurtEgerer]

Indoctrination video for new recruits ....

"We're here to help"

http://gawker.com/5002269/the-cruise-indoctrination-video-scientology-tried-to-suppress

[David]

I tried to read Dianetics. I made it a few pages in before I realized what a fuched up ideal it is. And I don't use that misspelled curse word lightly. These are some really messed up folks!!! No offense to any scientologists here, but if the shoe fits.

[trekkor]

Anybody notice that "thetan", sounds like "Satan" with a fierce lisp?


KT

[rouxroux]

Originally Posted by trekkor

Anybody notice that "thetan", sounds like "Satan" with a fierce lisp?


KT

Let's see...was'nt Thetan Saddam's lover on South Park?

...not that there's anything wrong with that

[john walker's workshop]

so, does anyone here embrace scientology? might answer some questions......

[nostatic]

you guys all just made a list somewhere.

oh wait....

[red-beard]

• Have you ever enslaved a population?

Define population

• Have you ever debased a nation's currency?

yes

• Have you ever killed the wrong person?

Define person

• Have you ever torn out someone's tongue?

not on purpose

• Have you ever been a professional critic?

took my 1st wife all the time

• Have you ever wiped out a family?

not enough toilet paper

• Have you ever tried to give sanity a bad name?

Do you even have to ask?

• Have you ever consistently practiced sex in some unnatural fashion?

define unnatural? or really, define natural?

• Have you ever made a planet, or nation, radioactive?

yes

• Have you ever made love to a dead body?

does my 1st wife count, the night she left me for someone else?

• Have you ever engaged in piracy?

Not in any was the RIAA can prove!

• Have you ever been a pimp?

for shizzle, mo dizzle

• Have you ever eaten a human body?

every sunday

• Have you ever disfigured a beautiful thing?

yes, I had sex with them

• Have you ever exterminated a species?

I HATE FRIGGEN FIRE-ANTS

• Have you ever been a professional executioner?

No, not professional

• Have you given robots a bad name?

I called one "scheissen-frau", does that count?

• Have you ever set a booby trap?

BOOBS!

• Have you ever failed to rescue your leader?

Yes

• Have you driven anyone insane?

Haven't I done enough damage here to prove this?

• Have you ever killed the wrong person?

define wrong?

• Is anybody looking for you?

EVERYBODY wants me!

• Have you ever set a poor example?

See the defacing beautiful things

• Did you come to Earth for evil purposes?

I am not a woman

• Are you in hiding?

Obviously not

• Have you systematically set up mysteries?

Every chance I get at work

• Have you ever made a practice of confusing people?

See above

• Have you ever philosophized when you should have acted instead?

see above

• Have you ever gone crazy?

see above

• Have you ever sought to persuade someone of your insanity?

see above

• Have you ever deserted, or betrayed, a great leader?

see above

• Have you ever smothered a baby?

I love my baby

• Do you deserve to have any friends?

you be the judge

• Have you ever castrated anyone?

I like 10% off everything

• Do you deserve to be enslaved?

I deserve to be served

• Is there any question on this list I had better not ask you again?

just about everything

• Have you ever tried to make the physical universe less real?

Yes, I cannot run for president

• Have you ever zapped anyone?

My wife, just this morning

• Have you ever had a body with a venereal disease? If so, did you spread it?

Every chance I get

[nostatic]

• Have you ever enslaved a population?

yes, but she asked for it

• Have you ever debased a nation's currency?

currently? no.

• Have you ever killed the wrong person?

No. Well, there was that one time in Yuma, but they couldn't find a jury of my peers

• Have you ever torn out someone's tongue?

I prefer to use a nice sharp blade, Clairice.

• Have you ever been a professional critic?

I'l invoice you after I tell you

• Have you ever wiped out a family?

Divorced twice...what do you think?

• Have you ever tried to give sanity a bad name?

I'm no tabs.

• Have you ever consistently practiced sex in some unnatural fashion?

no, but i have unnaturally practiced sex in a consistent fashion.

• Have you ever made a planet, or nation, radioactive?

You'll have to ask The Firm.

• Have you ever made love to a dead body?

Divorced twice...what do you think?

• Have you ever engaged in piracy?

Of course. I'm concerned about global warming.

• Have you ever been a pimp?

That's Dr. Pimp Daddy to you.

• Have you ever eaten a human body?

My g/f says, "yes, regularly"

• Have you ever disfigured a beautiful thing?

Have you seen my track car recently?

• Have you ever exterminated a species?

No, but I've examinated some feces.

• Have you ever been a professional executioner?

No, I only do that in my free time. Everyone needs a hobby.

• Have you given robots a bad name?

Bite my shiny metal ass

• Have you ever set a booby trap?

Divorced twice...what do you think?

• Have you ever failed to rescue your leader?

Yes, when the hook gets caught in the kelp.

• Have you driven anyone insane?

Divorced twice....what do you think?

• Have you ever killed the wrong person?

Accidently or on purpose?

• Is anybody looking for you?

Why, have you heard something?

• Have you ever set a poor example?

You're talking about my life's work.

• Did you come to Earth for evil purposes?

This is earth? Damn, another wrong turn at Albuquerque.

• Are you in hiding?

Boo!

• Have you systematically set up mysteries?

yes. no. maybe. yes.

• Have you ever made a practice of confusing people?

yes. no. maybe. yes.

• Have you ever philosophized when you should have acted instead?

Let me ponder that.

• Have you ever gone crazy?

Is this a trick question?

• Have you ever sought to persuade someone of your insanity?

I usually didn't need to persuade them very hard.

• Have you ever deserted, or betrayed, a great leader?

Mom, is that you again?

• Have you ever smothered a baby?

Have you seen my track car?

• Do you deserve to have any friends?

No, but life really isn't fair, is it?

• Have you ever castrated anyone?

Just my career.

• Do you deserve to be enslaved?

You bet!

• Is there any question on this list I had better not ask you again?

Ask me about my mom again. I dare you.

• Have you ever tried to make the physical universe less real?

Couldn't really be much less real, could it?

• Have you ever zapped anyone?

Yes, with my first rap album.

• Have you ever had a body with a venereal disease? If so, did you spread it?

Like peanut butter...

[TyFenn]

ZOANAS'S avatar is my religion! Please excuse me while I go 'pray'!

[Sapporo Guy]

What about 1fastredsc's ??

I gotta get my GF to do that for me