After 21 years... she's leaving

[Eric Coffey]

Originally Posted by Seahawk

I had Bo-Hoy, great appetizer, with my chick once, we wuz at a Chinese joint. So I sez to her, you know, nice like after the Bo-Hoy: Hickory Dickory Dock...

I thought that was you:

[T77911S]

Originally Posted by LeeH

Most, but not all of our mutual friends on Pelican already know this...

My wife and I have been married for 21 years. Things haven't always been perfect, but I thought they were pretty good. She came home from her 2.5 months of 747 training in Miami and announced she'd been happier without me and felt the opposite as soon as she returned home.

I tried to give her everything she ever wanted and have been her biggest supporter/cheerleader in all of her endeavors. We had our differences. I worked hard to accept them as such... differences, not things that needed to be changed or fixed. Sadly, I don't think she was able to get to the same place.

I'll refrain from going into details of our history, but after hanging out with you lot for the past 16 years felt the need to post the news here.

that always scares me when my wife goes home for a week or 2. worried she might realize she is happier when I am not around,

sorry to hear,.

we did have some problems years ago. we sat down and talked about it. thing is you BOTH have to want it to work.

[serene911]

Just posted this on our music thread, but it seems like timely advice for
this thread as well. Listen to it all the way thru. Fun song, but rock solid advice as well. Enjoy !!

[Oh Haha]

Cool song serene911!

Thanks for sharing that.

[flatbutt]

bo-hoy? = boo-hoo?

[serene911]

Appreciate it Oh Haha , it was originally written by a Chicago Tribune journalist
around 1997. As I recall ,she stated she was high on M and M's and coffee and was
was listening to many commencement speech's and decided to write her own. I think
she pretty much nailed it. Especially the one line " Don't be reckless with other people's
hearts and don't put up with people who are reckless with yours"
The song was put together by Baz Luhrmann and was on an anthology cd.

[Gretch]

Lee, hope all is well in your head. You are in charge of your frame of mind, man......... BE IN CHARGE.

[syncroid]

Originally Posted by serene911

Just posted this on our music thread, but it seems like timely advice for
this thread as well. Listen to it all the way thru. Fun song, but rock solid advice as well. Enjoy !!

Love this!

[kevin930t]

Lee i turned my x wife into a nunn.haha i am still scratching my head over that.There alot of chicks that love guys with Porsches so if u dont have one get yourself one it will keep u buissy always trying to figure out why it ran good one minute and runs like shart now..Haha

Sent from my SM-N910T using Tapatalk

[tevake]

While we guys are scratching our heads, trying to figure out just what is happening relationship wise .
This piece of insightful info comes to light for our on going puzzelment.

https://www.facebook.com/viralthread/videos/vb.363765800431935/1035332353275273/?type=2&theater

Life is mysterious indeed.

Cheers Richard

I know I may be buying into stereotypes a bit, but find it classic that the bloke is Aussi.

[Baz]

[Oh Haha]

spammer igonail reported

[LeeH]

Originally Posted by McLovin

How's it going, Lee?

We filed last week, on 11.16.16. AZ has a 60 day waiting period so everything should be final around the middle of January.

We had a 2.5 hour mediation session and that was it. There was some give and take on both sides, but I think the outcome was fair to both parties. In lieu of support, she did not contest an inheritance I had from years ago as my sole property and valued her 401K at face value instead of after tax value.

So I get the house + inheritance. She gets her 401K. Everything else will be split 50/50.

Parenting time is dictated by her work schedule. She's generally gone 17 days/month, so I automatically come out ahead there. The trade off is that my schedule for the next couple of years will revolve around her work.

We got along fine throughout the process. Came out on excellent terms... friends. I'm confident we'll stay that way.

Emotionally, I'm in great shape. I found a divorce support group on Facebook. This isn't a sit around and a circle and cry sort of group, but a social group. It's just been incredible. Tons of new friends, events, dinners, camping trips... I'm having a blast getting to know all of these people. They've all been through it so it's been the perfect place for me to be. Can't imagine I'd be as emotionally well at this point had I not found these folks. I'm sure many of the friendships I've developed there will last a lifetime.

Been on a few dating sites too. Have met some great women... the majority are way more into me than I was into them! Feels weird... cool, but weird. For me the chemistry was lacking with all but one. We'll see how that turns out. Taking things super slow. We've only met in person once, but dinner lasted 3.5 hours and thankfully the staff of the restaurant didn't kick us out when they closed an hour and a half before we left! I'm cautiously optimistic about her. Not getting my hopes up, but it's nice to experience the chemistry that was lacking with the others I've met. If things ultimately go nowhere with her, I at least have a new bar for how things should feel. Thanks for your concern, but please... no lectures on transitional relationships, rebound, etc. I'm aware... she's aware. It's something we've talked about.

[KFC911]

Good for you Lee....

"Sail on down the line" brother

[sc_rufctr]

Good news Lee.

[911boost]

Glad to hear it, sounds a lot like my experience. Shoot me a pm if you ever want to bs about it.

Bill

[billybek]

I can almost guarantee that she is a little upset at how well you are getting on with your life.

Good for you. Been there done that and it is all for the best in the end.

[recycled sixtie]

Sounds like you are doing well Lee. Initial separation is really tough on both of you but you survived. Better times are ahead.

[Oh Haha]

I'm glad to hear you are getting through this. Best wishes for a successful recovery.

[masraum]

It's fantastic to hear that things seem to be going really well, not only on the personal front for you, but that the actual divorce itself seemed to go so quick and easy.