Things are getting pretty bad..."Dad, I can't live like this anymore..."

[924slover]

right now it sounds like you are on a runaway train and your wife is heading the train for a cliff and she doesn't care if she takes the kids it's very heartless to not care about what the kids are exposed to. all i can say is get the kids and tuck and roll.

[M.D. Holloway]

She starts going off on me tonight for not yelling at our Son for going out side on the patio in his socks. In my calmst voice I say "I'll talk to him and please don't talk to me like that in front of the kids."

She freaks, yells some more, calls me a bully (not sure what that means) and slams the bedroom door.

A little while later our lil one is heading for bed. Mommy stops in mid tracks and starts in and again I say calmly "please, lets talk about this later - not in front of the kids please." Totally emotionless. she breaks down and starts crying saying "Fine, you won! What ever you say master. You won." WTF?

She storms away and I am in my lil ones bedroom. I look down at her and she says "I hate it when Mom is like that, it makes my stomach feel really weird." "OK, lets brush our teeth pretty girl." I say changing the subject. After a few silly jokes she seems OK. she gets ready to read in bed and mommy walks in. I didn't want to make her choose so I said I had to get our Son something to eat.

Later on, I went into our bedroom to get to our bathroom walking by her. She told me to get out. I again requested that she not speak to me that way and again she starts yelling saying I am bullying her, calling me an ******* and to get out. I swear on all that is holy that I did not bully her - the only thing I said was that we should talk about stuff away from the kids and she goes completely non-linear.

I walk out to the living room where our Son is watching The Office. I look over at him and he just looks at me smiling. I say "Did you hear that?" "Yup" "You OK buddy?" I ask. "Yup, Mom seems like she's just trying to work some stuff out."

Later on when I tucked him in we talked a little bit - "We just have to be patient Son. Things will work out we just have to all be there for each other. Please make sure when I'm not around to not back talk Mommy or get sassy with her even if you don't agree with her." "OK Dad."

[924slover]

i really feel for you , it seems she has reached a point where nothing even makes sense in her mind anymore. she thinks things are happening that aren't but she believes her own lies.

[porsche4life]

Mike you have the patience of a Saint. I would have blown a gasket right there. Grabbed the kids and left.

[Schumi]

Originally Posted by LubeMaster77

"Yup, Mom seems like she's just trying to work some stuff out."

Unfortunately it sounds like she's not trying to work it out, at all.

My friends and I describe women in the dating with this behavior (much less severe than your case) as chicks with 'their poles and zeroes in the wrong plane'. It's a controls joke. Given any input, the function 'blows up as t increases.

the crazy ones are said to not pass the Routh-Hurwitz stability criterion.

[svandamme]

i hate to say this, but you need to document this on video so you have "evidence".

[Joeaksa]

Agree. Would get one of those "pen camera's" that are selling on Ebay that she would not notice and start carrying it in your pocket. Video several of these impromptu outbursts to show what is happening with her.

This sure appears to be a train wreck in the making and you need to look at saving your kids and yourself.

[M.D. Holloway]

She went off on me this morning about buying our Son the Guiness Book of World Records 2010. He had his Scholastic book form - I went through it with him and the only book he wanted was that one. Mind you, he got another book ordered from our Daughters form. Mommy set a $20 limit for our lil one and though that we should keep the same limit for him. Well his book on her form was $15. I figuered that the GBWR would be cool for both and he agreed to share it. Needless to say she freaks about it - I'm not keeping her in the loop I guess. She told me to go through it with him and sign a check. Her bone of contention rests with the fact the he won't actually read the GBWR but rather look at the pics. He should get books he can actually read and get Reading Points (a program a school). She goes back to her premise that I am buying his love and that I am favoring him over her. I call BS on that. Our lil one is special to me and if anything I favor her.

I was supposed to take her to the eye doctor today - she told me she would take a cab. The shyt never ends...

[M.D. Holloway]

Red - those pens are inexpensive - @$35! Can I get them at Best Buy you think?

[red-beard]

Pen? Do you mean Joe?

I know we both look like Dr. Phil, but neither of us plays him on TV.

[M.D. Holloway]

I just figuered you know better...

[Porsche-O-Phile]

Originally Posted by svandamme

i hate to say this, but you need to document this on video so you have "evidence".

I've said this before.

You can get a memory recorder (an actual video camera - I have one) for about $400 with a tonne of memory. It's silent and can sit in the corner of a room or on a bookshelf to document anything she does against the kids. I hate to point this out (it will probably sound callous and that's not intended) but if she's visually impaired, how would she know?

You're heading down a path - like it or not - that will lead to war. Start stocking up on ammunition.

[Schumi]

Might not wanna just set a vid recorder on a shelf- even if she is visually impaired, if she finds it, sh**'s gonna get real. Best to have a pocket recorder or something a bit more discrete.

Best to not have her find that until it's brought up as Exhibit A, or never at all...

[Rikao4]

[QUOTE=LubeMaster77;4930755 it makes my stomach feel really weird." QUOTE]

you know that's an ulcer waiting to go big time...

Rika

[Gogar]

$99 bucks, about the size of your cell phone. Has a microphone and hooks up directly to your computer, and records 1 hour of video at a time.

It's really sad to think this way, but if you know it's going in the ditch you need to arm yourself. This is America, and you're the man, and the odds are against you even if you're right.

[M.D. Holloway]

so I called her up to see if she wanted me to drive her to the eye doctor. She says she'll take a cab. "I have to do is sooner or later." I pleaded with her to drive her but she just kept calling me a bully. Finally I asked what she wanted me to do "Jump off a building and die!" She says. This is not the first time she has wished me dead. Pretty harsh. After about a few minutes of silence on the phone from her side I finally hung up. She immediately calls back and asked why I hung up. "You said you wanted me to die. I tried to continue to talk to you but you were not saying anything so I hung up." "OK, I'm sorry I said that." News flash - first time she has apologized in ... I can;t remember the last time. This may be a first actually. She then says "Your killing me on the inside. I feel like dying!" and she hangs up. I call her back and she just hangs up on me. What am I supposed to do now?

[bivenator]

Don't call her back for starters. Her apology may be a sign of ongoing self examination. I know that you want this to work, you have done well to get to this point. Hang in there, maybe she will come around.
My own marriage is on shaky ground, but the kids remind me of the importance of success. I have been following this thread with a heavy heart as it parallels many of the same challenges that I'm facing.
A hearfelt good luck to you sir.

[Heel n Toe]

Originally Posted by LubeMaster77

What am I supposed to do now?

Maybe go back through the posts here and jot down the many things people have thoughtfully advised you to do and decide for yourself.

[vash]

jesus...lube. the stories you tell seem fabricated, unreal. they are that bizarre.

i'm a quitter. i would have bailed on page one of this thread. i feel for everyone, especially the kids.

[Schumi]

Your preservation / patience is amazing.

I think, after 16 pages of this, we may be missing an extra part to how it is you're sticking around:

is she hot? :-P j/k


She apologized for something, that could be a start of a turnaround in her head. There may be resolution for this yet.